The love experienced between two reunited twin flames is like a wild beast.
It can’t be captured. It can’t be contained. It can’t be tamed. Instead, it burns fiercely with an unquenchable form of intensity that is both exhilarating and formidable. The love experienced between twin flames is like Holy Fire: it burns you to ashes, but it also forges you into a new creature, like a Phoenix emerging out of the dust.
Although every twin flame relationship is unique and can’t be simplified, there is a general pattern that tends to emerge in these unions. As a person who went through a twin flame fusion, I know how overwhelming (and even terrifying) such an experience can be. I would have loved to read an article on common tell-tale twin flame signs when I was going through such a disorientating experience. But back then I knew nothing of twin flames or their significance. So here I would like to provide you with what I lacked: a general map that can help to guide you and pinpoint where you are right now.
PLEASE NOTE:
Although the idea of having a Twin Flame can be helpful, especially as spiritual partnerships are a beautiful avenue of growth, please keep in mind the following when reading this article:
- Firstly, “twin flame” is a theoretical mental idea meaning that it isn’t objectively true, but is instead a helpful label that can describe a unique relationship we might experience in life – as such, please try not to attach too strongly to it, otherwise it can cause you suffering (aka. take it all with a grain of salt!)
- Secondly, twin flames don’t “complete” you, instead, they help to support your spiritual evolution – no one and nothing “completes” you and you don’t need a twin flame in your life as a prerequisite to evolve or feel happy
- Thirdly, please try to avoid misusing the concept of having a twin flame to (1) dream of a “better” and “more spiritual” partner, (2) sabotage your current relationship, (3) pressure your pre-existing partner to fit into the twin flame role – this is all an unnecessary mind game, so please love and cherish what you have already (provided it’s a relatively healthy relationship)
With that said, enjoy. :)
8 Major Twin Flame Stages
Twin flames are said to be beings that aid our souls in finding completion. Ancient Greek philosopher Plato first created the idea of souls “split in two” that eternally yearn to find their “other halves.” These days we still carry around this idea of “find our other half,” but unfortunately we believe that it is absolutely imperative for us to find another person to be complete. Please keep in mind that while twin flames do help us to experience unconditional love and grow immensely as people, not all of us find our twin flames, and not all of us need twin flames to feel complete. Please read “7 Common Myths Embellishing Twin Flame Relationships” to read more about this.
Also, it helps to remember that the degree to which you can experience harmony in your twin flame relationship is dependent on your level of soulful maturity. For example, two old souls will have a much easier time at “holding it all together” than two young souls. You can read more about soul ages.
So keeping this in mind, what are the eight major twin flame stages that you’ll likely experience in your relationship?
Stage One – Yearning for “The One”
In this preliminary stage, you have spent your entire life pining for “The One” that doesn’t yet exist in your life. You have this strange sensation that someone who is perfectly molded to you is “out there” but you don’t quite know where or when they will appear in your life. Although you ache for your twin flame, you have a feeling they will appear to you at some point.
This stage is also sometimes spent “preparing” for the arrival of the twin flame on an unconscious level. In my instance, I had to learn how to love myself before I met mine. For others, this stage of preparation involves the development of self-awareness, discovery, and understanding.
Stage Two – Glimpsing “The One”
At some point, you will have a brief glimpse of your twin flame. Whether this is through a dream signal, or through a real-life meeting, suddenly the Beloved can be sensed. The result is profound. Wonder, joy, anxiety, and intoxication quickly ensue. For those cautious among us, a lingering sense of intense curiosity and desire to get to know the person better is the result. You don’t know what it is exactly, but this person is extremely special. Like me, you may even sense that this person will play an immensely important role in your life – even before you know them properly.
Stage Three – Falling in Love
When you fall for this person, you will fall very, very hard. You will fall harder than you have ever fallen for anyone – and the impact will knock the breath right out of you. In fact, as you get to know your twin flame better, you will fall more and more deeply in love with them. As a result, you’ll find it hard to stand with two feet on the ground. You might feel disorientated, lovesick and “unlike yourself.” You may even try to resist the attraction, but eventually, you’ll accept the reality that you’re deeply and madly in love.
Stage Four – The Fairy-Tale Relationship
As both of you eventually make your feelings known and enter into a relationship, life will feel like a fairy-tale. Your relationship with them will be perfect in every possible way. It will seem as though your twin flame fulfills every single need you have and everything you ever possibly wanted. This taste of “paradise” is what the matured twin flame relationship looks like after the next few stages of turmoil.
Stage Five – Outer Turmoil and Inner Purging
In this stage, there is trouble in paradise. As the ecstasy from the initial meeting period wears off, egos start to flare up. Suddenly differences in opinion, taste, and personality arise, and old core wounds emerge out of the gloom. While our twin flames share and mirror our deepest needs, desires, and dreams, they also tend to mirror our shadow selves. For example, if you are an emotionally repressed person, your twin flame will likely be emotionally explosive. If you tend to be arrogant, your twin flame will most likely be uncertain and quiet. In this way our twin flames challenge us, riling up our insecurities. This can be infuriating, devastating and very painful.
While all the arguing and fighting in this stage may seem disastrous, the truth is that it is necessary for our growth. Without being provoked, without seeing ourselves for who we “really” are, we live in illusion and fail to grow soulfully. But this is certainly hard to realize while you’re going through such turbulence in your relationship!
Stage Six – The Runner and Chaser
As tensions mount it is common for one partner (or sometimes both) to emotionally or physically withdraw and “run” away, and another to pursue in a game of cat and mouse. Sometimes this involves emotional shutdown and silent treatments. Other times this involves physical separation and in extreme cases, the permanent termination of the relationship. In this stage, twin flames experience a trial by fire. While some relationships last and are strengthened, others crumble to pieces. As I mentioned at the start, this is all dependent on each partner’s soulful maturity. Sometimes one partner leaves for many years and then returns, only to repeat the cycle once again. The chaser, on the other hand, tends to be the more mentally and emotionally mature partner of the two, trying to sort everything out and make amends.
Stage Seven – Surrender and Dissolution
Once the shadow of your relationship has been revealed, you may experience a period of surrender. After so much anguish, distress and provocation, you both begin to open up about your wounds and insecurities. In this stage, it is common to experience a lot of ego dissolution and soulful expansion. As the ego relaxes, powerful lessons are learned about the nature of oneself and the nature of the “other.” As you begin learning how to work through your differences, the maturity of your relationship deepens and thus strengthens.
It is common to go through stages six and seven many times throughout your relationship.
Stage Eight – Oneness
As the problems in your relationship become increasingly easy to deal with, you will enter a period of soul reunion. In stage eight it is common for you to both find a shared meaning, passion or cause that brings you a mutual sense of fulfillment. As the ego continues to relax, virtues such as forgiveness, understanding, empathy, and patience are learned. The more you both work through each issue that comes your way vigilantly, the more you experience the sensation of “Oneness,” or ego death.
This is a true miracle.
Need More Help?
If after reading this article you still feel stuck, have questions, or need help, see our twin flames book. In this book, we’ve taken the ancient idea of soul mates and the modern archetype of Twin Flames, stripped away the non-essentials, and presented the very heart and soul of what it means to be in a spiritual partnership … and how to gracefully move through these twin flame stages, see through the shadows, and experience the transformative power of love.
Our Twin Flames and Soul Mates book is a down-to-earth, heart-opening, and authoritative guide to the power of love as a force of awakening. Be sure to check it out if you need more guidance.
***
Have you found your twin flame? Which of these twin flame stages have you experienced in life and what insights can you share? I’d love to hear from you below.
I met my twin flame in 2018 when I started a new job. The moment we locked eyes I felt a intense love and need for this person. It was imminent to both of us that the connection was undeniably fierce. We fell so helplessly in love for each other so fast and I knew I wanted to be with him for the rest of my life. We lived together for two years and it was the best two years of my life. I never pictured my life without him. We opened up the deepest part of each other, and this made us realize where we needed change and growth. Near the end of our relationship in 2020, my partner was struggling with drug abuse and after a emotional talk with my partner about his struggles he decides the answer to his internal work was to rejoin his childhood religion, that I neglected to even know about. He wanted me to convert so we could spiritually grow together but the love we shared never felt so conditional at this ultimatum. I denied this plea. he moved 8 hours away to be with his mother that also follows his religion. As… Read more »
Well I met the person who is my TF online, it was weird as we felt this full on connection even before we met in person, we were blown away by it. We met and it we were madly in love. I moved 1500kms to be with my TF but after a while the triggering began…the running by my oartner started and the relationship ended, however we tried a few.morw times but need to do more growing. We acknowledge the connection and we can not explain it as we feel this energy when we meet, still!! We are just friends but cant stop being pysical with each other and we speak nearly every day….my.live for hwr is unconditional. We have some weird simularities in our lives and its like I know what she is thinking, my intuition is madness….I know what she feela before ahe tells me….she had attraction for someone else and I knew it before she told me. I just have this feeling no matter what will happen in our lives we will always have deep connection no matter how much she tries to run away! Ha its unexplainable, my freinds and family dont understand it! Lol
I truly believe we have found each other. 23 years ago our pays vrossed, we were drawn to each other intensely. Sadly or
More accurately devastatingly it ended, w a level of pain so deep that 23 years later there are pieces that still
Have not been healed. 10 years ago she resurfaced, once again we were drawn. About 11 months ago I gave in. Now as date would Have it once again we are dealing w a separation. Of course it is a complicated and complex situation which offers almost manic levels of happiness and pain. I long for the reunion stage when we settle in and ride off into the sunset so to speak. The most amazing part which has brought me to this twin flame idea, 23 years later the love never died, if anything it gained strength and depth.
Thank you for the article on twin flames. It explains completely a relationship I have just had, it was an affair, and that has ended, but we want to remain friends because we know we have another level of connection than just the romance. We both have recommitted to our original partners and are happy, but we know there is a special love between us, and we want to keep it and nurture it. Thank you
Thank you for the article. I met my twin flame 1.5 year go, I didn’t know it was until I accepted that love my twin flame. I felt the awakening in my soul and I felt complete, no more searching even we are not together now, it’s ok for me because I found the one that was for me and that encounter changed me forever. I know my twin flame has to continue with the path and we will meet again but for now I don’t need nobody else just bring the memory to me and that makes me happy.
I am 71. Throughout my journey there have been strange moments . Some of those time frames changed my life. Real wind romance . One instance I recall,he could find me in a crowded mall.
Visiting someone in hospital ,person next to them I had connection with their loved one that was in car accident.I did not know this person or even knew his name. The accident was many years before. I remember feeling sick that people were running to see this maingled up man. I stood behind. I finally had to ask the lady and could not understand how I knew. I was in my early twenties.
First of all I wanted to thank the authors of these articles on twin flames. It was a real relief to read it and a AHA moment. I met my twin flames 4 years ago and this meeting changed my life, everything changed starting that point in time. At that time we were both in a relationship, married with kids but we have fallen in love like we have never experienced before. But very complex situations and it has led to the separation. We did not speak to each other for two years and a half and we have reconnected since one year. Our personal situation have evolved, we are now both single, but we are still facing difficulties in communicating without our ego and fears. So far, we have not decide to be in a romantic relationship even if we love each other unconditionally. But still, we are knowing this runner-chaser dynamic. Personaly I have the chaser energy very much, I have known the dark night of the soul and can tell how much it is difficult time. Nevertheless, what I wanted to share here is, even if you feel surrounded by darkness and you don’t see the end… Read more »
I didn’t know I met my twin flame until last week. I have been with this man for 1 1/2. We had to hide our relationship and lie to our families . He is my Ex boyfriends brother. He approached me and from then on we have been together. I kept telling him that it’s so weird how comfortable I am whenever I am with him. I told him it feels like it’s meant to be through out our relationship. First it was suppose to be a friends with benefits kind of thing but it turned into a love story and heart ache. I told his brother 3 months ago and now their relationship is not good. My loves feelings towards me has changed and now we are at the separation phase. At first he was the chaser and d was absolutely in love with me and then The tables turned I am the chaser and can’t give up on him. So now I am giving him his space and hoping he will come back soon.
I feel as though I might’ve found my twin flame, but at the same time the stages have moved so fast, and we are only able to talk online. It’s hard to know for certain if I’m just stretching it to fit my desires, or if it really is. Any ideas on how to figure it out if you can’t see each other in person?