Why You Should Quit Searching for “Purpose” This Year

It’s the start of a new month. A new year. Everyone is screaming at you to “set goals,” “define your yearly objectives,” create lists, and journal about what you want to change.

Others are totally rejecting the “new year, new you” propaganda and going in the opposite direction: “you’re fine as you are,” “resolutions don’t work,” “do X instead.”

Yeah, it’s predictable. But it still leaves you in the same place: wondering how the f*ck to navigate your inner work journey ahead.

If you’re like most sensitive folk, you feel lost right about this time of year. Perhaps a little overwhelmed and inundated with all the info.

But deep down, you still ache to do some soul-searching and find your purpose and pursue it. So I’m going to keep this short and sweet and cut through the noise.

My Experience With Losing Purpose

I used to want to find my purpose.

Sometimes, I still buy into this fantasy, thinking it will be the solution to my problems.

But purpose is a fickle creature.

Would you believe that I’ve lost and regained my purpose about ten or more times through my years running lonerwolf? This struggle is a silent despair that happens behind the scenes – one that feels like a rollercoaster of joyful highs and deep lows.

If I were to base my life on “finding purpose,” I would have probably shut down lonerwolf years ago in one of those low moments of grief and self-doubt. 

But I’ve kept going. Why?

I keep doing what I do because I know my deeper truths.

I know that my core needs center around being creative and making a difference, and my core values focus on love, freedom, and contribution.

Sure, there are other elements at play here that I won’t go into right now. But without knowing these guiding lights, I’d be totally lost in the dark.

Why You Should Quit Searching for “Purpose” This Year

It’s not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are. — Roy Disney

Let me get straight to the point here. Searching for your “purpose” is a poor use of your time and energy because it’s an externally driven goal. 

Purpose isn’t something you “find” out there.

It’s something you internally “feel” as a result of living in alignment with your core needs and values. 

Purpose isn’t a destination – it’s a side-effect of alignment.

Read that sentence again, slowly.

Directly seeking purpose is like chasing a rainbow. You never catch it! But if you stand where the sunlight hits water droplets (aka, alignment), you get the pleasure of seeing that beautiful multi-color miracle over and over again.

Here’s another analogy: 

So many people try to build the ‘house’ of their lives (Purpose) before they set the foundation (Values). But without that solid base, the house just comes crumbling down when the winds of life come.

This is why you keep struggling to find your purpose in life: you’re searching for external answers to an internal problem.

You don’t have a purpose problem. You have a values problem.

What I Recommend Doing Instead

Your soul knows the geography of your destiny. Your soul alone has the map of your future. ― John O’Donohue

Firstly, stop trying to “find” your purpose. It’s a crazy-making exercise that results in tons of wasted time and energy. It’s a sucky way of starting the new year.

Instead, start clarifying your core needs and values. This is a much wiser use of your time.

The first helpful question to ask yourself is this:

 “If you could live by three values for the rest of your life, which would you choose?” 

Do this for your core needs as well.

Next, to test the strength of your choices, you can ask this question: 

“Without this in my life, do I feel a fundamental part of me is missing, drained, empty, or unfulfilled?”

If your answer is a quick “yes,” then great! If you still hesitate or aren’t sure that your response is confident enough, then go back to reflecting. 

Here I’ve given you two powerful questions to start with.

But if you find yourself hesitating, feeling chronically stuck in life, or in the dark, you don’t have to figure it out alone. 

Sometimes, we need a clear path to help us bypass the mind’s confusion and get straight to our Soul’s truth.

If you want to stop guessing and know, with 100% certainty, what your foundation is, I’ve created a specific process for this. The Soul Work Compass is designed to take you out of the ‘seeking’ loop, into clarity and alignment.

Stop searching for a purpose. Start building your inner compass.

To support you in building this foundation as we enter the New Year, we’re offering the course at 15% off for a limited time.

You don’t need a “new you” this year. You just need to find and align with your Soul’s inner compass.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ “I am finding out so much about myself and having so many realisations about my life that tie in to the course material … I already know it is what I’ve needed for so long.” – Jen N.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ “I really love the depth this course offers through what appears to be such a simple path.” – Elisa F.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ “I felt like I really dove into finding my true authentic self and my true purpose.” – Stephanie M

Get the Soul Work Compass (15% Off)

Alignment, Direction, Purpose

Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony. — Mahatma Gandhi

Alignment – not purpose – is the keyword to focus on here. How aligned are you with your deeper needs and values? How aligned are your choices and habits each day?

Because if you aren’t aligned with these deeper truths of your Soul, you will keep wandering around in the dark, wondering, “Why do I feel so purposeless and lost?”

Alignment → Direction → Purpose. 

That’s how it works. 

Let me know what comes up for you in response to the two questions in this post in the comments. 

Stay true to yourself, and happy New Year. ;)