Most people are already dead. Their minds are constantly preoccupied in past thoughts and resentments, and future worries and plans. We go about our days fully absorbed in any thought, recollection or feeling that pulls us away from completely tasting life as it is right now. And most of us don’t like challenging and pushing ourselves to the limits of our soulful capacity: instead we make our lives as comfortable, numbed-out and sheltered as possible, as though we’re already lying in our graves. We’re surrounded by the living dead … we are the living dead.
My partner said these words a few days ago. It was a balmy night and the sun had just set. Mosquitoes buzzed around us pricking the back of our hands as we mused over the monotony of human activity in front of us.
“This is as alive as you will ever feel,” Sol said suddenly, and I realized he was completely right. Although watching cars go back and forth wasn’t exactly glamorous or fascinating, I realized that it didn’t have to be. You don’t need to travel to some fancy location to feel alive. You don’t need to go on an expensive vacation to feel joyously awake. You don’t need to have the perfect job or perfect life to taste the experience of Being.
But as usual, we think that external situations and fixes will soothe our chronic boredom, our existential angst. And so we go chasing after the next form of stimulation – and the next, and the next – until we end up with depression, or some other form of mental or physical illness.
Spiritual Wanderer Course:
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐ "I started the Spiritual Wanderers Course a short while ago and for the first time in twelve years I have started to experience love, acceptance and compassion for myself and within myself. Thank you so much." – Vivienne S.
If you are a chronic boredom sufferer who finds life mostly an insufferable and tedious string of predictable events, keep reading.
6 Ways to “Recycle” Chronic Boredom
You may not know this about me, but I suffer from boredom quite a lot. I can understand people so well that socializing – which also follows a predictable pattern – has little interest for me (although I do enjoy connecting deeply with others on an emotional level). Routines and habits also bore me, people’s drama bores me, celebrations bore me, food bores me, traveling bores me, romance bores me, and I even bore myself at times.
Chronic boredom has been an awkward little companion that I’ve carried around for a long time. I like to picture boredom like a piece of spat-out-gum that has the nasty habit of lodging itself under the shoe of my life, making everything so damn annoying. Wherever you walk, it’s as though you’re always aware of this imperceptible presence that sullies the experience with its infuriating stickiness.
But although chronic boredom can feel impossible to shake, I have managed to emerge from the grave of the living-dead life to learn and grow from the experience. I want to share with you what has worked for me in the order of relevance/ importance below:
1. Use your chronic boredom as a wake-up call (here’s how).
Whenever you feel yourself lapse into that state of apathy and lethargy, pay attention. You will almost always find that the cause behind your boredom is taking life for granted. Feeling bored is like saying “Yeah yeah. I’ve been there, done that, seen that before. None of this is good enough. I need more, I WANT more.” But do you? Have you really seen, done, or experienced every nuance of the present moment before? In my experience boredom is the perfect wake-up call because it reminds us that we are lapsing back into our living-dead state of existential monotony. When we feel bored it is as though our soul is reminding us that we are living too much in the past or future, and not living each day as though it is our last.
I find that the best cure for chronic boredom is acceptance – but not the passive kind. Accept your state of unhappiness and remember that it is serving as the perfect wake-up call, but also balance that with actively seeking to reprogram your mental restlessness.
2. Let your chronic boredom reveal to you what you’re unhappy about in life.
Not only does chronic boredom reveal that you’re not appreciating the present as it is, but being bored also points to some deeper form of discontentment in your life (but not always). Perhaps you need to quit your dead-end job and find something better suited to you and your dreams? Perhaps you have too many draining commitments, and need to “cut away the fat” from your life? Perhaps you aren’t taking enough risks, or you’re taking the easiest path when you would benefit from the harder path? When you ask “Why don’t I find any joy in life right now?” and pursue the question until it’s answered, you might be surprised by your answer.
Shadow & Light Membership:
Dissolve the shadows that obscure your inner Light in this weekly email-based membership! Perfect for any soul seeker serious about practicing ongoing shadow work and self-love.
3. Is ingratitude your frenemy?
I often find that my boredom comes as a result of forgetting to be thankful for what I have. When the mind is in the habit of constantly finding gratification in a future-orientated thought or feeling, present moment life can never quite feel “good enough.” Not only that, but when we take for granted what we have, we often expect it to be even better than what it is capable of being by imposing our beliefs, desires and expectations onto it. For example, if you feel bored in your relationship right now, have you ever considered that you might be taking your partner for granted? Of course, there are many other causes for feeling unhappy in relationships, but one common cause is ingratitude. If you only had one hour left with your partner, would your feelings towards them change?
Ingratitude is like a frenemy (friend/enemy) because it fools us into believing that there is something perpetually “better” than what we have, while at the same time causing us great unhappiness.
The best solution I’ve discovered for ingratitude is stopping everything you’re doing for a few moments and savoring your surroundings. I like to find at least 5 things I’m thankful for, e.g. “… for the fresh breeze,” “… for how considerate my partner/friend/co-worker is,” “… for this comfortable chair,” “… for the challenges that help me grow,” etc.
4. Your habits might be suffocating you.
Human beings quickly make close friends with habits because they provide structure, organization and a sense of security. But not all habits are made to be kept, and in fact many of the habits we religiously keep greatly contribute to our feeling of chronic boredom. It was only the other day when I realized, “WAIT … I don’t have to only exercise in the afternoon? I can actually exercise in the MORNING as well?!” It sounds ridiculous, but this actually blew my mind because I had been so ingrained in a pattern of living that all other options became non-existent.
Consider what habits might be weighing down on you, or what routines could do with a spontaneous makeover right now.
5. Poke yourself with the stick of proactivity.
Being comfortable in life has its light and dark side. On one hand being comfortable can be really enjoyable and refreshing – but on the other it can breed laziness, apathy and emptiness. If you want to get the most out of life you need to poke yourself with the stick of proactivity. By this I mean that you need to be vigilant and provoke yourself to action when you feel as though you’re lapsing into boredom. Yes, this might be uncomfortable and even annoying at first, but it is the only way you can break the cycle of tediousness.
How can you do this? Do this by thinking of one thing you can “poke a stick at” in your life. That may be learning how to make your own DIY shampoo, or watching a movie genre you’d never consider watching, or learning to kayak, or brushing off the dust from your old forgotten book manuscript, or even learning how to be a tourist in your own country. There are many ways to get yourself up and running again.
6. Learn how to enjoy the small passing moments in life (here’s how).
Learning how to enjoy the small passing moments in your life is about firstly developing the ability to be present. Pulling yourself away from your incessant mental chatter can be very hard, but as you slowly learn how to purely experience each present moment, you will also learn how to appreciate the small joys in life. Focused breathing, solitude, introspection and mindfulness meditation are all effective ways of learning how to be self-aware and present. Once you put your mind to it, you will start enjoying even the most subtle experiences of life like the gentle reverberation of leaves against the wind, ants crawling across the floor, distant traffic in the background and the silence of the night.
Final Thoughts
Chronic boredom is an experience almost everyone goes through in life at one point or another. Yes, you might be super intelligent, and yes, you may have experienced a lot, but the full spectrum of life can’t be limited to your ingrained perspective, conditioned beliefs, or narrow body of experiences. Opening yourself up to learning from your boredom requires humility and also the courage to be wrong in the face of your hidden judgments and misconceptions about life.
Are you a chronic boredom sufferer? What have your experiences been and what advice can you offer to others dealing with the same problem?
Would you like to save this?
We'll email this article to you, so you can come back to it later!
Your information will never be shared.
If you need more help, we offer 3 powerful ways to guide you on your inner journey:
1. The Spiritual Wanderer Course: Feeling lost or uncertain about your path and purpose in life? Gain clarity and focus by learning about the five archetypes of awakening within you. Discover your deeper path and purpose using our in-depth psychospiritual map. Includes 3+ hours of audio-visual content, workbooks, meditations, and a premium test.
2. Shadow & Light Membership: Seeking ongoing support for your spiritual journey? Receive weekly intuitive guidance and learn to embrace your whole self, including your shadow side. Deepen your self-love and receive personal support from us.
3. Spiritual Awakening Bundle: Ready to soul search and dive deep? Access our complete "essentials" collection of beloved journals and eBooks. Includes five enlightening eBooks and seven guided journals, plus two special bonuses to further illuminate your path.
It would be best to list yourself a few things to do!
Thank you for this piece. I am in the crushing throes of an existential boredom. I relate to your description of things that bore you, it’s all so predictable and obvious that it feels impossible to participate in the world. I am able to imagine many possibilities for applying myself, but the fact that all possibilities are open to me creates the sensation that none of them are worth pursuing. I know this is an illusion, but the wall of boredom and inertia I have created in my own mind feels insurmountable. I am grateful, and I’m not depressed. It’s just that my mind seems to have lost the ability to create meaning, and motivation has gone with it…leaving an unbearable feeling of emptiness.
Take a walk in nature even if down the block with people all around and cars , etc. Focus on your thoughts(while watching for traffic) see whats troubling you for real deep down…depression, over what. Slowly if you muster the “let me get out here” repetitions you will begin to feel something other than ( please exscuse me forgive me) self pity phase and raise yourself above it all. Try not to convince yourself of your hum drum mortal coil. Often we expect life to just take over the show and run our lives..we need to distance sometimes from the mortal coil and get outside our own heads.. I am guilty of it .Momma nature keeps me “insane” and doing ok . Give it whirl u never know the synchronicities that could happen, but you have to keep aware to see it all…
55 year old male and have been feeling this way for a loooong time – haven’t even been able to generate enough interest/energy to attempt a “reboot”. I am definately scared of the unknown once we shed this mortal coil though – would like to be able to suround myself in a spiritual blanket but nothing speaks to me – most groups seem more like fairy tale stories – oh well keep on keepin on
Jeff
Make a list of things to do. Octal therapy might help!
try islam. you’ll be surprised
This article is really meaningful, helpful, and well written! Thank you for taking the time to write it.
Existensial boredom has hit throughout my life. I’m not confident of the cause but have some guesses. i can recall to childhood the same feelings you describe of disinterest in things i normally found interesting; i even made a list of all the toys and games i could choose from in an attempt to obey my mothers instruction “you have so much, go find something to play with”. I remember it being painful and insurmountable as a child (so few skills and options for distraction). But you define the feeling perfectly and the advice you give, even at boredom’s most intense, did off a glimpse into relief.
This is absolutely true. I have come to learn that everything happens for a reason and all our needs are met. For this reason I have recently moved into a house apart from my husband in an effort to save our marriage, and I have absolutely no fears about the future as I am taken care of in the best possible way.
I think you have your answer to a potentially escalating problem..distance and a try out away from the usual. Good for you and your strenghths..
Boredom is just a reflection of the meaninglessness of life. Everything we do in life is meant to try and give it meaning. Unfortunately, there is none. My best advise: learn to make peace with it!
Meaning is a product of the mind, but life is innately whole and perfect in the present moment. Thanks for your advice Antonio. :)
From what I have read there are a lot of depressed people out there.. I can talk I have my moments..I learn from them..Exhaustion plays a deep part for me and a hinderance of anemia(yuk) Tomorrow is another day and sleep or rest and meditate and let go of the things that go bump in your lives and soon it becomes a habit(the 21 day thing) It works for me, so far, and its been over a yr. Anticipation of tomorrow is a problem for me. Maybe it is for some of you too?
Great read Luna. You are 100% correct in saying that chronic boredom stems from the lack of appreciation of the present moment,I know this very well. I am by nature very futute orientated,always worried about what I will need to do to properly affect my future. It’s almost an obsession,and this leads to a lot of procrastination too. It’s a double edged sword,on the one hand this has helped me to plan my life to be as simple and flexible as possible,and I’ve managed to live pretty comfortably so far, on the other hand I find it difficult to live in the present and to be fully engaged in the now.
Thank you Lupe. I know the feeling. Recently I’ve been acquainted with a revolutionary idea, the concept of “wait and see.” We impose ourselves so much onto life and it can be exhausting, but when we wait and see we allow life to run its natural course. We wait until the time is right to make a decision or action. This of course requires mindfulness and discipline, but I think you may be interested in it.
Sounds very interesting,I’ll definitely give it a try.
Lupe you hit my nail right on the head! Tomorrow, tomorrow, oy tomorrow…..
this resonates with me very much… I love it thanks so much. I feeel so alone to think that its only me who suffer from this. or let say not suffer but experience. I never knew that being bored means alot of things to consider too:)