Thin-skinned, hyper-sensitive, wimpy, spineless, wussy, feeble, weak, fragile, melodramatic, temperamental …
If you can relate to, or have been called a combination of any of these words, chances are you’re part of a unique group of people: the Empaths.
Occurring in an estimated 5% of the population, Empaths are known for their highly developed ability to sense the emotions and thoughts of the people around them. As author and Empath Christel Broederlow put it “empaths often possess the ability to sense others on many different levels”, this includes the abilities to intimately understand what a person desires, yearns for, and is currently feeling, suffering or thinking, as well as the ability to feel other people’s bodily illnesses. These occurances manifest themselves as energy vibrations that the finely tuned Empath can pick up on, or “tune into”.
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Commonly identifying as clairsentients and HSPs, Empaths possess an ability that is both a blessing and a curse. On one hand, the Empath is an excellent listener and counselor, knowing the best way to comfort and assist those around them. On the other, being an Empath can be painful and tiring. It’s common for the Empath to be weighed down and constantly congested with the negative emotional energy of others, often creating physical and psychological disharmony.
Although the Empath has a wonderful gift, and is often greatly cherished by those around them, they are often challenged and confronted by a variety of misguided perceptions towards their innate gift.
Myths & Misunderstandings
“You need to grow some thicker skin! Stop being so overly sensitive.” I wish I could tell you how many times I heard that in my childhood! Growing up as an Empath, you may have experienced similar insults from your parents, friends or peers, and perhaps even worse.
It’s not at all trendy or popular to be sensitive or feeling in our society that values efficiency, cold calculation, and industrial resilience. Therefore, you may have experienced and still experience, a lot of antagonism towards your behavior as an Empath. I will explore four of these main misperceptions below.
Myth #1 – Empaths are navel-gazing and self-absorbed.
Truth – We often focus more on others than on ourselves.
It’s true that Empaths are often unexplainably moody and quiet on the outside. However, this isn’t because they’re excessively absorbed thinking too much about themselves and their feelings. Rather, the Empath is often deeply affected by the exterior emotions of others that he experiences as his own. The Empath’s ability to intuitively feel the feelings of others is what weighs him down so much. In fact, it’s characteristic of the Empath to pay more attention to others needs than his own.
Myth #2 – Empaths are mentally ill.
Truth – We are magnets of negative energy. This often creates psychological disbalance within us.
Empaths are excellent listeners, confidants, and counselors. For this reason, it’s common for people to be drawn towards their sincere and caring natures, almost like magnets. Therefore, Empaths often experience a lot of “emotional baggage dumping” from other people, and have difficult releasing themselves from the negative energy that remains in their minds and bodies afterwards.
Unfortunately, this can lead to a lot of lingering depressive emotions that the Empath is left with. Thus, the Empath can appear to be mentally ill and depressed, and in some cases legitimately is. However, in most cases the Empath is congested with remnants of harmful emotional energy, like sinuses are congested with mucus during a flu virus.
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The root of the problem doesn’t lie with the Empath, it’s a result of their outer emotional climate.
Myth #3 – Empaths are psychologically frail.
Truth – We are biologically programmed to be more sensitive and in tune with our surrounding environment.
As Empath Nicole Lawler wrote, Empaths are essentially “walking around in this world with all the accumulated karma, emotions, and energy from others”. Understandably, this results in a lot of inner emotional tension for the Empath who is more prone to crying and exhibiting other signs of “weakness”.
Additionally, the Empath finds it extremely difficult to partake in many “normal” activities. For instance, watching a movie about Nazi concentration camps is extremely emotionally upsetting for the Empath, and getting a job in an office is overwhelming and tiring for the Empath who is bombarded with other people’s emotions constantly. Therefore, it’s not surprising that the Empath is often perceived as “wussy”, “frail” or “weak minded” to the person who fails to comprehend the constant pressure the Empath lives under.
The fact that most Empaths aren’t driven clinically insane by the constant emotional flux they experience is testimony enough to their mental strength.
Myth #4 – Empaths are lazy.
Truth – We often lack mental, emotional and physical energy due to our intense empathetic ability to understand others.
Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) amongst other physical issues like headaches, insomnia and Fibromyalgia, have all been commonly attributed to Empaths.
If our minds are constantly overloaded with stress, tension and pressure, it therefore translates that our bodies are as well. This often results in sicknesses such as the ones mentioned above. Thus Empaths often lack the energy and therefore desire to do many things, preferring to relax (including taking naps) instead.
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If you’ve experienced any of these misperceptions in your life, please feel free to share your experiences below. Also, feel free to take our Empath Test or read our empath book to get more in-depth guidance. Being an Empath can certainly be riddled with setbacks, however, it’s invaluable to remember how much of an asset you are to the world. Our planet needs a balance of both hard and industrious people, and soft and empathetic people. You form an important part in this great Universal Balance.
If you would you some more free resources, check out our extensive collection of empath articles!
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I’ve always felt this way and i’ve read into it quite often. I always found that i can handle the negative energy and also being able to help people is a good thing, but sometimes it make it difficult for me to distinguish my own emotions. In relationships it is especially hard because i’m not always sure if its how i feel or not. Sometimes i really just feel like a mirror reflecting back to the world.
So is it possible to use these abilities in other situations? I’m not sure if I’m an empath as you would define it though I took your test and scored 75%. I often use my intuition to help my friends, however I also use it to get around those I deem the source of other’s emotional problems by turning their negativity back on them. I’ve also found my abilities incredibly useful in martial arts, or in making bad situations go my way. Is this unusual or have you come across this before?
The great think about all these materials is you could download them and save them for later in case they get erased or one thing.
I suffered from migraines from a very early age, Age 10 or 11. Doctors could never explain it. I was also always overwhelmingly emotional and passionate, but perceived as shy, quiet, weird, and prone to social anxiety. I was always prone to illness, to the point of my mother growing tired of taking me to the hospital. Was also told I suffered from High Functioning Autism. I was the mediator of the family starting very young, and adults in my family used to confide in me asking for advice to some of life’s problems. Even problems that I haven’t experienced myself: ie: divorce and relationships. I resented it when I was 18 looking back thinking, how dare they burden a child like that. But now I am realizing it is my gift and I have to learn how to better use it so I’m not driving myself mentally insane and always having unexplained and sudden physical illness. People used to think I was faking when I’d suddenly curl over in pain I was feeling in my abdomen area. It’s such a relief to figure out why and work on improving my life because of it. It can only go up… Read more »
Most of my life i knew i was different when my uncle was murdered he came to me in a dream told me what happened can tell when people lie or feel evil around me many more things i have experienciend realize these doctorsare quik to medicate you because the fear of the unknown im proud to be who i am also have gift to heal.
I read your article and discovered I wasn’t going mad at all!!! After 54 years I discover I’m an empath. I always knew I picked up other people’s emotions but I didn’t know why or how to deal with it…I’m still not sure I know how but at least I know why. And why I have pulled away from people so much, I felt like I couldn’t cope any more. I’ve been so emotional lately from other people’s “stuff”
Now I can try to work out better ways to deal with it.
Thank you
I had never heard the word Empath until last night when I was reading an article about empathy and social anxiety. I’ve always know that I was connected to others emotions. I can feel how they are feeling. I’ve learned though that this world will hurt you if you are not strong. I use to cry a lot when I was little. I remember as a small child empathizing with ants and talking to the trees among other behaviors that were considered weird or odd. I desire to be alone in peace. I have a very hard job where I’m constantly using my gift. I’m a investigator for child protective services. I usually come home feeling like I don’t have another drop of energy to give. Like all the life has been drained from me. I’m glad I did come across these articles. I’ll try to continue to learn so that hopeful one day I can be in control of my peace. That’s all I truly desire is peace
I am so tired and sore. I hurt inside and out. I can’t sleep because the only peace I find is when everyone else is asleep. I just want to be alone on a deserted island.
I’m an empath and have a lovely connection with trees. Being able to lean back against the trunk and place my hands flat on the bark allows me to feel the stress and excess energy draining away. I also get the feeling of being hugged and feel very relaxed after a few minutes.
I always knew I was a bit “odd” but I liken my being an Empath to having a spongy soul. Some people just zap the life right out of me and make my soul feel dirty. Many, many times while standing in a line I have gotten Erie feelings about the people behind or in front of me, a few times I actually have left the line. I have such a small circle of friends and some in my family think this is strange, however, I have to be very careful of who I spend my time with and can not explain this to others. One member of my family makes me feel so horrible it is hard to visit, it takes me days to recover from the negativity that pours out of her and is absorbed into me. I am so very happy to have stumbled across this article and to know I am not crazy, a softy, a psycho, a dweller on constant sorrow, weird, negative, oh my gosh I could go on and on. Now if I could just shut this off so I could sleep more and control my emotions I would be all set.