My first insight into the feeling of being internally old occurred during adolescence.
I felt unusually different from the kids around me, somehow older, but ‘mature’ wasn’t exactly the right word.ย The best way I could describe it back then was as though I had lived hundreds of years of life which had been condensed into 16 years of time.
As the years went by, I encountered a few Old Souls who I shared my experiences with.ย I would talk about my insights and introduce them to the concept of Old Souls.ย One of these people was Luna.ย She was so excited about it that she eventually wrote the well-received article 9 Signs You’re An Old Soul as well as a subsequent Old Soul Book.
In my years of mentoring Old Souls and helping them through their spiritual development, I’ve witnessed a number of issues. I want to mention that it’s important to remember thatย having an Old Soul doesn’t necessarily equate to being ‘all-knowing’ or perfect.ย Rather, it’s an indication of the age of the energy known as your soul. With that being said, these are some of the biggest problems I’ve seen, and personally experienced:
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1#ย You’re a Social Outcast
As with anyone who perceives the world differently from others, Old Souls can experience a great (and unending) sense of isolation.ย Because they fail to fit into the standards that society admires and values (careers, materialism, status and so forth), they’re commonly seen as strange, offbeat and unconventional.
2#ย You’re the “Black Sheep”
While Old Souls can build many strong relationships with people, their penetrating ability to connect with the depths of the people in their lives can create many enemies.ย Seeing deeply into the core issues of the people around them, Old Souls feel an innate desire to be truthful, even if this means revealing uncomfortable truths such as the fact that many problems are caused by immaturity, or a failure to take responsibility.
Those who are willing to change will listen and like you, while the rest will feel great disdain towards you.ย This is why Old Souls often become the “devils advocates” or “black sheep” of their friends or family.
3#ย You Often Get Mislabeled
If there’s something we all love and are good at, it’s labeling people.ย We fool ourselves into thinking we can “know” someone by attributing a label to them.ย However, humans are far too complex to be boxed into a specific and unchanging group of people.ย In this case, Old Souls will often be given different labels, from “beatniks” to “hippies”, “anarchists” to “new age freaks“.
While you can’t fight labels, you can try to use them in a positive way.ย Labels can be used as signposts, as directions towards awareness of some quality many of us share.ย These qualities will be different in intensity and strength in each of us, but at least they will help us understand ourselves (and the people around us) a bit better.
This is partly why I called the Old Soul Group “I’m an Old Soul” – not so people can gain egotistical pride with such a label, but to create a sense of self-awareness, to allow people to better understand themselves.
4# You Speak an Entirely Different Language
Words are symbols we each load with our own unique definitions according to our own unique life experiences that are associated with each word.ย What I associate with love might be entirely different from what you associate with love.ย For example: When someone thinks about love, they might remember their old failed relationship and feel a terrible sense of vulnerability when the word arises, while others might associate love with loyalty and friendship.
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Old Souls realize this limitation, and therefore greatly struggle to express entirely what they want to say, knowing that it’s as though they are speaking an entirely different language from others.
5#ย You Are Prone to Intense Existential Crises
I have sometimes witnessed cases where Old energy is born into the body of a person who does not have the matching mental maturity to embrace it.ย This can result in depressions, substance abuse and existential crisis’s.
When a person realizes that everything is transitional and passing, life can become pointless.ย This person sees that our bodies are temporary vessels that don’t really matter, and without the ability to cultivate self-love, self-destructive habits can result.
In this case, it’s necessary to undergo intense spiritual-growth, to cultivate existential meaning and inner-understanding through inner work in order to learn how to embrace your soul.
6#ย You Easily Become Emotionally Drained
With the wisdom and patience that comes with being an Old Soul, there also comes others people’s desire to use you as a dumping ground for their emotions.ย I’ve experienced this a lot in my own life, often experiencing emotionally-charged conversations that last for hours at a time.ย Some Old Souls also double as Empaths, which can also take a great toll on your energy.
7#ย You’re Prone to Becoming Mentally Drained
In the search for truth, deeper understanding and inner exploration of yourself and the world around you, it is common for the Old Soul to experience a lot of mental fatigue.ย Double this with acting as a mediator between people and their problems, and you’ll end up exhausted at the end of the day.
#8ย You Struggle to Find a Kindred Spirit
If making friends who connect with you is difficult, finding a kindred spirit, soul mate, or life partner, can be even more of a challenge.ย It took me living in 6 different countries to find Luna.
But it’s not always as hard as that.ย Having the wisdom to discern the true depths of your connection with a person will be your greatest asset in the area of love.
#9ย You’re Crippled By Possibilities
As we grow in maturity our perception of possibilities and explanations expands: we see life from limitless angles.ย This means that we see more than one way of doing things which makes us unfailingly indecisive as we see the full expanse of possibilities, and the lack of absolutes. Although making decisions and judgments can be a crippling experience, this can double as a virtue, allowing us to understand that we can’t simply judge people by face value, and that they are the result of millions of internal and external influences.
#10ย You Yearn For a Place to Belong
For some Old Souls, the world feels alien.ย They find it hard to understand people, why such chaos and misery exists and how it is allowed, and sometimes encouraged, to continue. They long to find a place where they feel like they belong, a space filled with freedom and liberation.ย This often results in the feeling that this world is not their true home.
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Regardless of which of the above problems you may come across, these struggles will affect your life a lot less when you grow in inner understanding and acceptance.
The stronger your ability to channel and use the Old energy that is latent within you, the greater your capacity will be to aid in the continuation and evolution of your soul.
Please feel free to share your experiences below.
There was something almost mysterious about this woman. Her face had lots of wrinkles. These were the first things to catch your eye, but they didnโt make her look old. Instead, they emphasized a certain youthfulness in her that transcended age. The wrinkles belonged where they were, as if they had been part of her face since birth. When she smiled, the wrinkles smiled with her; when she frowned, the wrinkles frowned, too. And when she was neither smiling nor frowning, the wrinkles lay scattered over her face in a strangely warm, ironic way. ~ Haruki Murakami (Norwegian Wood)
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im soo glad i came accrost this tonight. its three o clock on the morning and i can finally sleep knowing that im not just a crazy person. What caught my eye in this article was the name luna. My name is luna, im 13 years old. ive alwaise felt “older” scince i was young, and not in a superior way, but just in the way that i felt more understanding of the things going on aroung me than others. this was never much of a problem for me. I got along with my teachers better than peers at school, and would rather hang out with my friends parents than my friends themselves sometimes. Despite getting some wierd looks from kids this never really bothered me much. but this last year has been hard for me because i dont feel like i really belong anywear, and dont connect with anyone very well. i became much more intoverted than i have ever been and just lived my life hiding behind music. i crammed myself with practices and concerts so i wouldn’t have much time inbetween to think about how alone i felt. This last month i’ve decided that i just spent an entre year not really living, just because i was scared of who i am. i now refuse to let anyone make me think that being and inquisitive and “old” person makes me unlikeable. im just glad that i found this and thank whoever wrote it because it just made my night a whole lot better. thans againg. much love, luna.
Hola Luna,
The name Luna is quite beautiful (though I am biased, seeing as my part is the Luna co-author of this site). It means Moon in spanish and is usually is surround by an immense energetic magnetism (just like the moon in the sky).
You teenager years are the hardest as I mentioned to Albert in the comment below, you feel older than people treat you and you are at the mercy of society and your parents who both think they are doing the best thing for you.
It can also be a valuable time for learning about yourself. If you don’t socialize much it provides a great space to cultivate understand about yourself and others that you can later carry on into the future. I can guarantee it will make your life a lot more easier as an adult if you learned to find yourself at your age, as you are still fairly unpolluted from the conditioning you’re exposed to throughout high school (popularity, self image etc..).
Feel free to let us know any problems or struggles you go through as our community is more than happy to share their own experiences growing up and with similar issues as you’ll come across. :)
thanks for the advise, nice to let it out
… Thanke you… you put into words feelings that iยดve been harbouring in the most recent years of my life.
This articles answer many questionยดs that formed when i saw… almost all the people my age (17) behave and think in a complete diferent way.
While other people think about parties… i think about freedom, not just from the chains that twisted morals and laws have tied us to, but freedom from the dullnes of life.
These feeling of being older… described… it feels good.
Hola Albert,
Your youth is perhaps one of the worst periods of being an Old Soul.
You’re trapped in a education system you don’t believe in but are forced to go. Surrounded by people that you struggle to get along with and feel so alien and distant from.
As you get older (physically) that changes, you gain at least a bit more freedom to choose your environment and who you share your time with. Any problems you have now, will seem insignificant in a few years…it’s something that Old Souls will know the best.
Everything is very transitional so there’s no need to put much worry into anything. I’m happy you found us!
Wow Sol!
You just spoke directly to me.. about me.. one to one!
Also read 9 Signs Youโre an Old Soul by Luna. Absolutely loved it.
I now feel like there is someone who actually know and understand what I feel and talk, which is quite a rare occurrence..
It really feels good to know that I am not alone here. It really feels great to know that I am not the only one suffering this problems. It feels good to know that I am not an “alien”.
Really glad to find you guys..
Thanks
Amitav :)
Hola Amitav,
It feels you with light and joy doesn’t it? It’s strange how finding fellow travelers can enhance our own journey.
We may be comfortable with solitude, but our souls also crave to connect back to their source, their origin. When we find another Old Soul who shares our vibration, it resonates deeply with us and fills us with excitement.
I’m so glad you found our community and look forward to reading more of your experiences!
I thought I was the only one.
Thank you for these articles!
You’re not alone, far from it Sos. Olds Souls span far and wide, you’ll come across them when you least expect it :)
Insightful and thought provoking. Thank you. You have put into words things I have known but not been able to communicate.
Hola Robert,
Sometimes it takes a perspective of a tree outside of the forest to give enough distance to explain what we intuitively already feel but can’t see yet.
thanx
Your welcome Dr Z !
Finally a voice and clarification. Thank you.
Hola Raine, I’m only here to share my own experiences and look forward to reading yours.
All of these problems have been mine to work with during my entire life. My family also moved around a lot so that the constants in my life became animals, books and my family members. Now that I’m in my 7th decade, I see that both my parents are/were young souls, my brother is a high level infant soul, and my sister is another old soul. My mother recently passed on, and the soul levels became clear as the family dynamics around her death played out. Many of the problems for old souls became more acute for me during the past couple months, but I am true to myself, honest and gentle, and it helped me grieve in a good way while continuing on with my life. My yearning for a place is stronger than for a mate, probably because I am just tired of the search. I prefer to be solo and alone now. I believe I am an Earthling, not from somewhere else because I love nature so much. This is my planet I think. My place on this planet is not where I currently live (albeit it is a good place to live), so I am working on moving back to the region where I first became conscious of being an old soul as a child. Most of the other problems are part of my daily life, which I work at enough so I can function in my work place, within society enough to “pass”, and in relation to the responsibilities that life has for me as a citizen in the U.S. I am at the point of accepting what is.
Hola Elaine,
It takes a drastic change (like the passing of your mother) to sometimes shake the foundations of a relationship and see exactly how the cogs are working.
Finding that place where we feel like we belong can sometimes be one of the most difficult tasks. There are sacred places in the world, places where you have experienced personal transformations. In my culture we believe in the magnetism of these locations, so we keep “Khuyas” (sacred stones) from all the different places we have felt a connection with to carry around with us.
If you can’t be where you feel you should be, at least you can carry a bit of that places energy with you wherever you go.
Everything up to and including #4. All the other things that follow are opportunities to overcome.
#5: Cynicism can be worse than death. Counter it with optimism and hope. If not for yourself, then for others. Work to be an inspiration.
#6: Respect yourself, and establish your own personal boundaries. If you do not respect yourself, you cannot expect others to do so. This will lead to further emotional (self)abuse. You are responsible for this choice.
#7: See #9.
#8: Up to you to light this flame in others. Then again: do good, and good things will find their way back to you.
#9: This is a hard one. You cannot try and achieve everything at once, for it will diminish the quality of your effort. Instead, start by choosing where you have most impact, and work from there.
#10: Accept yourself, your fragile life, and enjoy each moment. This way you can feel like you belong almost anywhere.
Hola Stijn,
These problems, just like any, are indeed opportunities from learning something, for growing further. To be stagnant when you come to a roadblock is to be dead.
Thank you for sharing these helpful suggestions, I’m sure many fellow Old Souls will find them useful to apply :)
I am in my 5o’s and was very much like this as a child and at moments now on a regular basis,however whilst I understand the extremely difficulty of feeling loneliness I also understand that we need to reach out and shine as the best possible beings that we can. We are nearing the end of our journey, and those that follow us need to understand that there is hope. That whilst we may in our deepest deepest soul understand that this place is a learning ground to transcend whilst we are here we should behave to the best of our abilities, show compassion, evolve up to the highest good and savior the beauty in its groundedness and the art the joy the love because when your souls journey has ended you will never experience those again her., be kind to yourself and know that you are not really alone, others have gone before us and others will come after us…. we are a long long link in a chain of learning……
Hola Loretta,
I’m glad you brought this up. It is important to keep in mind that this problems are transitional, that as we grow and become more comfortable in our bodies they slowly start to go away.
It’s easy to become self-absorbed in these problems and let them overpower our lives; centering on ourselves and forgetting that by focusing less on us and more on others these problems will lose their hold on us.
Thank you for sharing your experienced wisdom.