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ยป Home ยป Starting The Journey

10 Universal Problems Old Souls Experience

by Mateo Sol ยท Updated: Jul 8, 2023 ยท 280 Comments

Image of an old soul woman in a forest holding an owl

My first insight into the feeling of being internally old occurred during adolescence.

I felt unusually different from the kids around me, somehow older, but ‘mature’ wasn’t exactly the right word.ย  The best way I could describe it back then was as though I had lived hundreds of years of life which had been condensed into 16 years of time.

As the years went by, I encountered a few Old Souls who I shared my experiences with.ย  I would talk about my insights and introduce them to the concept of Old Souls.ย  One of these people was Luna.ย  She was so excited about it that she eventually wrote the well-received article 9 Signs You’re An Old Soul as well as a subsequent Old Soul Book.

In my years of mentoring Old Souls and helping them through their spiritual development, I’ve witnessed a number of issues. I want to mention that it’s important to remember thatย having an Old Soul doesn’t necessarily equate to being ‘all-knowing’ or perfect.ย  Rather, it’s an indication of the age of the energy known as your soul. With that being said, these are some of the biggest problems I’ve seen, and personally experienced:


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1#ย  You’re a Social Outcast

As with anyone who perceives the world differently from others, Old Souls can experience a great (and unending) sense of isolation.ย  Because they fail to fit into the standards that society admires and values (careers, materialism, status and so forth), they’re commonly seen as strange, offbeat and unconventional.

2#ย  You’re the “Black Sheep”

While Old Souls can build many strong relationships with people, their penetrating ability to connect with the depths of the people in their lives can create many enemies.ย  Seeing deeply into the core issues of the people around them, Old Souls feel an innate desire to be truthful, even if this means revealing uncomfortable truths such as the fact that many problems are caused by immaturity, or a failure to take responsibility.

Those who are willing to change will listen and like you, while the rest will feel great disdain towards you.ย  This is why Old Souls often become the “devils advocates” or “black sheep” of their friends or family.

3#ย  You Often Get Mislabeled

If there’s something we all love and are good at, it’s labeling people.ย  We fool ourselves into thinking we can “know” someone by attributing a label to them.ย  However, humans are far too complex to be boxed into a specific and unchanging group of people.ย  In this case, Old Souls will often be given different labels, from “beatniks” to “hippies”, “anarchists” to “new age freaks“.

While you can’t fight labels, you can try to use them in a positive way.ย  Labels can be used as signposts, as directions towards awareness of some quality many of us share.ย  These qualities will be different in intensity and strength in each of us, but at least they will help us understand ourselves (and the people around us) a bit better.

This is partly why I called the Old Soul Group “I’m an Old Soul” – not so people can gain egotistical pride with such a label, but to create a sense of self-awareness, to allow people to better understand themselves.

4# You Speak an Entirely Different Language

Words are symbols we each load with our own unique definitions according to our own unique life experiences that are associated with each word.ย  What I associate with love might be entirely different from what you associate with love.ย  For example: When someone thinks about love, they might remember their old failed relationship and feel a terrible sense of vulnerability when the word arises, while others might associate love with loyalty and friendship.


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Old Souls realize this limitation, and therefore greatly struggle to express entirely what they want to say, knowing that it’s as though they are speaking an entirely different language from others.

5#ย  You Are Prone to Intense Existential Crises

I have sometimes witnessed cases where Old energy is born into the body of a person who does not have the matching mental maturity to embrace it.ย  This can result in depressions, substance abuse and existential crisis’s.

When a person realizes that everything is transitional and passing, life can become pointless.ย  This person sees that our bodies are temporary vessels that don’t really matter, and without the ability to cultivate self-love, self-destructive habits can result.

In this case, it’s necessary to undergo intense spiritual-growth, to cultivate existential meaning and inner-understanding through inner work in order to learn how to embrace your soul.

6#ย  You Easily Become Emotionally Drained

With the wisdom and patience that comes with being an Old Soul, there also comes others people’s desire to use you as a dumping ground for their emotions.ย  I’ve experienced this a lot in my own life, often experiencing emotionally-charged conversations that last for hours at a time.ย  Some Old Souls also double as Empaths, which can also take a great toll on your energy.

7#ย  You’re Prone to Becoming Mentally Drained

In the search for truth, deeper understanding and inner exploration of yourself and the world around you, it is common for the Old Soul to experience a lot of mental fatigue.ย  Double this with acting as a mediator between people and their problems, and you’ll end up exhausted at the end of the day.

#8ย  You Struggle to Find a Kindred Spirit

If making friends who connect with you is difficult, finding a kindred spirit, soul mate, or life partner, can be even more of a challenge.ย  It took me living in 6 different countries to find Luna.

But it’s not always as hard as that.ย  Having the wisdom to discern the true depths of your connection with a person will be your greatest asset in the area of love.

#9ย  You’re Crippled By Possibilities

As we grow in maturity our perception of possibilities and explanations expands: we see life from limitless angles.ย  This means that we see more than one way of doing things which makes us unfailingly indecisive as we see the full expanse of possibilities, and the lack of absolutes. Although making decisions and judgments can be a crippling experience, this can double as a virtue, allowing us to understand that we can’t simply judge people by face value, and that they are the result of millions of internal and external influences.

#10ย  You Yearn For a Place to Belong

For some Old Souls, the world feels alien.ย  They find it hard to understand people, why such chaos and misery exists and how it is allowed, and sometimes encouraged, to continue. They long to find a place where they feel like they belong, a space filled with freedom and liberation.ย  This often results in the feeling that this world is not their true home.

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Regardless of which of the above problems you may come across, these struggles will affect your life a lot less when you grow in inner understanding and acceptance.

The stronger your ability to channel and use the Old energy that is latent within you, the greater your capacity will be to aid in the continuation and evolution of your soul.

Please feel free to share your experiences below.

There was something almost mysterious about this woman. Her face had lots of wrinkles. These were the first things to catch your eye, but they didnโ€™t make her look old. Instead, they emphasized a certain youthfulness in her that transcended age. The wrinkles belonged where they were, as if they had been part of her face since birth. When she smiled, the wrinkles smiled with her; when she frowned, the wrinkles frowned, too. And when she was neither smiling nor frowning, the wrinkles lay scattered over her face in a strangely warm, ironic way. ~ Haruki Murakami (Norwegian Wood)

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About Mateo Sol

Mateo Sol is a spiritual educator, guide, entrepreneur, and co-founder of one of the most influential and widely read spiritual websites on the internet. Born into a family with a history of drug addiction and mental illness, he was taught about the plight of the human condition from a young age. His mission is to help others experience freedom, wholeness, and peace in all stages of life. [Read More]

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  1. Heather says

    November 13, 2014 at 12:35 pm

    Wow…
    I know, I know; what a simple word after a wise, deeply inspired article. I was doing just fine and agreed merrily with every point. I thought to myself, “I’ve known this for some time; I’ve accepted these things.” Then number 10 came along and wham, the rug was pulled out from under my feet and I was left bruised, breathless and in tears!
    From my earliest memories to just this past week, there have been days when I felt utterly desperate to “go home”. When I was sad as a child I often cried to go home. Bless my confused mother as she would gently tell me I was already there. Home has never been a physical, tangible place in my mind, but that hunger to be “there” existed painfully and probably will for the rest of my life.
    After finishing the article, I sat for some time in complete silence. I was at peace! The idea that others have possibly felt the same desire was overwhelming. I would often give in to the belief that my idea of home would have to mean death as some key components to my ideal of home are: kinship with someone who truly understands (and accepts) my deepest, innermost existence and isolated in dense nature with the purity of her creatures. Things I’ve nearly given up hope in finding.
    I know I will continue to struggle with many of the “issues” you defined so eloquently, but reading them has renewed my strength and hope. I can now be at peace with the thirst to find “home”, knowing one day it will come and there are others who understand exactly what that means. Thank you is far too miniscule a description for the gratitude I feel. Wow…

    Reply
    • Mateo says

      November 13, 2014 at 5:14 pm

      It’s for realizations like yours that we put out hearts and souls into writing a wide variety of content that speaks to different layers within us all.

      The thirst, this hunger that you speak about has been ever present in all of us since the dawn of man. It has been those who, due to their soul ages, were sensitive and receptive enough to the feel and listening to that yearning and use it as a quest to go and search.

      They never knew what they were searching for, all the knew was that there had to be a place, a space somewhere that would make this feeling go away by providing something else, something deeper and more real.

      In my culture we call this world a ‘dream’, and in order to reach home you must wake up from that dream. To search, not the external world, but the worlds within so you can slowly destroy the false reality that has been created around you through beliefs, ideologies, values and perceptions that are incongruent with your authenticity.

      There is hope Heather, and you’re not alone in this journey. You’ll meet many of us along the way who with share glimpses and pieces of our findings.

      Keep your eyes aware and your heart open :).

      Reply
    • Miguel says

      February 01, 2015 at 1:57 am

      Join I’m an old soul on facebook
      :)

      Reply
  2. enaira says

    October 31, 2014 at 11:51 pm

    Aftet reading your articles about solitude, i feel so happy about myself. I now understand myself more. I am starting to love myself. And embrace everything about me either good or bad. I am really happy i’ve found your website.

    Reply
    • Mateo says

      November 03, 2014 at 8:27 am

      I’m so happy yo hear that Enaira, everyday I am constantly reaffirmed my journey is on the right path because I find such great fulfillment from people like yourself who share my journey also, and can benefit from the breadcrumbs I leave behind.

      I hope someday you’ll do the same, and share what you’ve learned in your journey for other solitary travelers :)

      Reply
  3. Eireann says

    October 19, 2014 at 11:46 pm

    Thank you. I knew I wasn’t the only one. Your words have struck a chord which resonates deep within me. Again thank you.

    Reply
    • Mateo says

      October 20, 2014 at 8:37 am

      Thank you Eireann. We all go through this same journey, although a solitary one, it’s reassuring to know others have also been there and passed by the same path we’re on :)

      Reply
  4. Sam Lezameta says

    October 14, 2014 at 6:04 am

    I’ve been told that my soul is old. But I feel like there’s more too it. There’s always a seed of doubt for everyone, regardless of how much I trust them. I always feel like I’m going to be abandoned. I feel that there’s a possibility that I was abandoned before, but I don’t know when and I don’t know by who. Sometimes when I’m by myself, I consider why I always feel like this and I have no idea why. I’m still young, younger than many of the people that have posted, but I feel like I’ve died and lived so many times before that my body’s lost count….is that a strange feeling? Not only that but when I’m alone I have the urgency to tell someone I care about them because I feel like they’re going to abandon me. The fear seems simple and childish, but now its been growing more and more.

    I don’t know whats wrong with me. Maybe because I haven’t reached the age of maturity yet, or maybe because it seems that my heart has come to terms that everything ends. That’s what it feels like, anyway.

    Thank you for writing these articles, they’re very insightful and I’m glad to know that somewhere there are others who are like me.

    It dulls the ache a bit.

    Love,

    Sam

    Reply
    • Mateo says

      October 14, 2014 at 8:53 am

      Hola Sam,

      Perhaps you would benefit from some past life regression? It’s quite possible your youth is a contributing factor to the feeling of abandonment. The younger you are, the closer you are to your past lives. As we age we are less in touch with these fears and feelings and they become buried deep in our subconscious.

      There might also be some underlying psychological fear of emotion, affection and acceptance being taken away from you. The fear of abandonment comes from being afraid of rejection, of self-worth being taken away from you because your self-worth comes from the people you loves attention.

      Keeping that in mind, it is important to develop a strong sense of self-love, so you don’t depend on others love and fear losing it. That you are grounded in yourself, with your own respect and love for yourself. I suggest starting here: https://lonerwolf.com/involution-self-love/ , and moving on to https://lonerwolf.com/authenticity/ .

      Let me know if there’s any way I can help,

      Sol

      Reply
  5. Jessica Wilson says

    October 13, 2014 at 12:15 am

    You look so familiar. :)

    Reply
    • Mateo says

      October 13, 2014 at 7:55 am

      We might have met in a past life :)

      Reply
      • Jessica Wilson says

        October 13, 2014 at 2:18 pm

        Absolutely possible. Luna looks familiar as well. It’s the eyes.

        Reply
        • Mateo says

          October 14, 2014 at 7:42 am

          They are the windows to the soul after all :)

          Reply
  6. Dylan says

    September 23, 2014 at 4:11 pm

    I’d like to thank you for creating this community. I have never really understood why I felt different from the people surrounding me, and it tends to make me very insecure. As I have older I have begun to accept myself and I think I’m on the path to the self love that you talk about. It has been a hard fought battle getting to where I’m at, having struggled with accepting my sexuality and lot in life, dealing with my parents seperation, being bullied in school, daddy issues etc. Depression is putting it lightly, and often times I seriously consider suicide. Until reading through several of your articles, I could never put a finger on why I felt different, but your explanations have brought a new level of understanding. I often thought that I was just more mature, though that never fit quite right, being twenty one I am still full of immaturity. I do tend to seek solitude, rather than attend social gatherings or even just visit with “friends.” That word is a bit strong for how I actually feel about them, because honestly i only keep them around so that i look more social than I truly am.
    Thank you again for the insightful description!

    Reply
    • Mateo says

      September 24, 2014 at 1:38 pm

      Hola Dylan,

      I feel great pleasure to know that our work here contributes to the better self-understanding of our beautiful readers. Despite the name of this website, we do believe that it is necessary for most people to realize they are alone, even in their enjoyment of solitude. And more importantly, they aren’t alone in all these unique qualities many of you possess that enriches the world with different fragrances, even though to a society focused on efficiency efficiency and automation it is always seen as a threat and discouraged.

      Soul Ages are just a stepping stone along your journey for better and deeper understanding of yourself. You can only decide where to go in life once you’ve realized and accepted where you are.

      Thank you for sharing with this community your experience and I look forward to reading more of how your journey unfolds.

      Reply
  7. Kelsey says

    September 14, 2014 at 8:52 am

    Hello,

    Thank you for creating a website that specify in Old Souls.

    My whole life, I was different and I could never fit in. When I was younger, I wanted to fit in so bad, I created an alter ego of myself and did things my true self would have never allowed.

    At the time, I was depressed and lonely so I was seeking love and approval from the outside world instead of looking within.

    It took a few years but I learn to accept myself for who I am and my life change a lot. My main focus now is to live a simple and peaceful life. At this point in my life (I’m 25 now) I could care less if I have any friends or what everyone else is doing. I just don’t want to be around people that much anymore because of all the chaos that is going on in the world.

    My main focus is to take care of me and be at service.

    I’ve have grown into myself so much it was definitely a change and it kind of scared me a bit and I was forcing myself not to change but it has gotten to the point where there was no turning back (if this bit make sense) and I know I was scared because my whole life I was fighting with myself and it all I know. Certain things still surprises me today but I am taking it one day at a time and try to be the best version of myself as I possible can.

    I read Luna’s book about the Old Soul and I enjoy it. Do you guys have anymore recommendation for these type of books?

    Thank you and again thank you guys for creating a community like this. It’s nice to know I am not the only one and it gives me hope that I am not crazy, lol and what I am is okay.

    Reply
    • Mateo Sol says

      September 15, 2014 at 8:11 am

      Hola Kelsey,

      You’re welcome, we feel soul ages plays an immense role in our spiritual journeys so it’s only natural we provide enough information about Old Souls for everyone to benefit.

      In many Old Souls journeys I think it is necessary to define their false ego so they are capable of truly seeing it, before they drop it to find their authentic selves.

      Having many people in your life does create unnecessary friction in your spiritual journey which is why I often choose to only keep a few close relationships that I feel I can maintain and won’t interfere with my personal path. I respect your decision to seek a peaceful life, it’s a wise choice for now, who knows what discoveries or opportunities arise in the future that can change that?

      I understand very well what you mean. There comes a point in the spiritual path where you have seen too deep and too much, you cannot just turn around and forget everything you’ve experienced so the only option is to continue, as hard as it may seem.

      I’m not aware of any other works on Old Souls that I find of significance, I know of a few authors who are going to publish books on the topic soon though. We have a page dedicated to collecting all the Old Soul information we’ve posted so far: https://lonerwolf.com/old-souls/ We plan to write a few more articles in the future.

      We are happy to have you as part of our community. Our community is an ironic one, the outsiders who enjoy the company and presence of other outsiders :).

      Reply
      • Karrianne Lehman says

        June 17, 2015 at 1:20 pm

        jjust wanted to say i think they are the outsiders and we are not… that we are the guardians of the earth…lol…

        Reply
  8. melisa says

    September 12, 2014 at 1:59 pm

    But i am sure you are right, I am guessing I am having a personal struggle with faith even though I have been lucky enough to expirience none physical events. The back of my scientific mind usually is my downfall. So obviously I guess others expirience or likemind thoughts assist in my personal journey and perhaps one day I can do the same for others. The fact that this blog exist, solidifies that, or is it that we are on this journey on our own; or just certain aspects of it? Thank you very much for your time, it is appropriated greatly

    Reply
    • Mateo Sol says

      September 15, 2014 at 8:52 am

      The teaching value of pain is very simple; if there was no suffering, no pain in life…how would we truly value happiness? how would we value joy?

      We need suffering and pain in the world as a contrast to the happiness; the only way you can see a white dot on the wall is if the background is darker than that dot. Similarly, we need to experience suffering in order to truly appreciate happiness, otherwise constantly being happy would not really mean anything as we would have nothing bad to compare it to.

      I understand your struggle, it’s hard to see the value of something bad when you feel so closely interconnected with it. But as you progress through a spiritual path you’ll realize everything is perfect just as it is. There is much in the world that could be avoided, that could be ‘better’, but those changes will only come once you truly learn to accept yourself, to accept life, to create no resistance. It is the resistance in life that creates all this problems by so many people; our desires to kill, for power, for wealth, for fame are all expectations that we burden the world with and create a friction, a resistance towards the natural progress of life. Once that stops, the ‘suffering’ can be significantly minimized.

      I hope that answers some of your questions, let me know if there’s more.

      Reply
  9. melisa says

    September 12, 2014 at 1:48 pm

    I understand all that. You see I lost my brother to a violent murder. He was only 13, I have no vengeance towards his killer and I don’t know who the killer is. However, what I am referring to is not my pain, but their pain, as well as, the pain of anyone who suffers. I understand the death, but not the necessity of suffering. I am fine, because I feel he is on his journey or he was here to teach us. I don’t feel loss though I miss his physical body, but it’s not like he is gone. It is hard for me to put what I mean in words. I do enjoy being alive, and I enjoy everything about life except pain. I do not understand the teaching value of pain, unless it is to teach empathy. When empathy is achieved, what then? I don’t know how to explain. I am not sitting worrying at all and I have no issue with it not ending. I simply want to understand what greater elements arise from suffering and mostly for those who suffer?

    Reply
  10. melisa says

    September 11, 2014 at 12:45 pm

    I received 88 percent and I am 33.

    Sorry for the scattered comments :)

    Reply
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