Thin-skinned, hyper-sensitive, wimpy, spineless, wussy, feeble, weak, fragile, melodramatic, temperamental …
If you can relate to, or have been called a combination of any of these words, chances are you’re part of a unique group of people: the Empaths.
Occurring in an estimated 5% of the population, Empaths are known for their highly developed ability to sense the emotions and thoughts of the people around them. As author and Empath Christel Broederlow put it “empaths often possess the ability to sense others on many different levels”, this includes the abilities to intimately understand what a person desires, yearns for, and is currently feeling, suffering or thinking, as well as the ability to feel other people’s bodily illnesses. These occurances manifest themselves as energy vibrations that the finely tuned Empath can pick up on, or “tune into”.
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Commonly identifying as clairsentients and HSPs, Empaths possess an ability that is both a blessing and a curse. On one hand, the Empath is an excellent listener and counselor, knowing the best way to comfort and assist those around them. On the other, being an Empath can be painful and tiring. It’s common for the Empath to be weighed down and constantly congested with the negative emotional energy of others, often creating physical and psychological disharmony.
Although the Empath has a wonderful gift, and is often greatly cherished by those around them, they are often challenged and confronted by a variety of misguided perceptions towards their innate gift.
Myths & Misunderstandings
“You need to grow some thicker skin! Stop being so overly sensitive.” I wish I could tell you how many times I heard that in my childhood! Growing up as an Empath, you may have experienced similar insults from your parents, friends or peers, and perhaps even worse.
It’s not at all trendy or popular to be sensitive or feeling in our society that values efficiency, cold calculation, and industrial resilience. Therefore, you may have experienced and still experience, a lot of antagonism towards your behavior as an Empath. I will explore four of these main misperceptions below.
Myth #1 – Empaths are navel-gazing and self-absorbed.
Truth – We often focus more on others than on ourselves.
It’s true that Empaths are often unexplainably moody and quiet on the outside. However, this isn’t because they’re excessively absorbed thinking too much about themselves and their feelings. Rather, the Empath is often deeply affected by the exterior emotions of others that he experiences as his own. The Empath’s ability to intuitively feel the feelings of others is what weighs him down so much. In fact, it’s characteristic of the Empath to pay more attention to others needs than his own.
Myth #2 – Empaths are mentally ill.
Truth – We are magnets of negative energy. This often creates psychological disbalance within us.
Empaths are excellent listeners, confidants, and counselors. For this reason, it’s common for people to be drawn towards their sincere and caring natures, almost like magnets. Therefore, Empaths often experience a lot of “emotional baggage dumping” from other people, and have difficult releasing themselves from the negative energy that remains in their minds and bodies afterwards.
Unfortunately, this can lead to a lot of lingering depressive emotions that the Empath is left with. Thus, the Empath can appear to be mentally ill and depressed, and in some cases legitimately is. However, in most cases the Empath is congested with remnants of harmful emotional energy, like sinuses are congested with mucus during a flu virus.
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The root of the problem doesn’t lie with the Empath, it’s a result of their outer emotional climate.
Myth #3 – Empaths are psychologically frail.
Truth – We are biologically programmed to be more sensitive and in tune with our surrounding environment.
As Empath Nicole Lawler wrote, Empaths are essentially “walking around in this world with all the accumulated karma, emotions, and energy from others”. Understandably, this results in a lot of inner emotional tension for the Empath who is more prone to crying and exhibiting other signs of “weakness”.
Additionally, the Empath finds it extremely difficult to partake in many “normal” activities. For instance, watching a movie about Nazi concentration camps is extremely emotionally upsetting for the Empath, and getting a job in an office is overwhelming and tiring for the Empath who is bombarded with other people’s emotions constantly. Therefore, it’s not surprising that the Empath is often perceived as “wussy”, “frail” or “weak minded” to the person who fails to comprehend the constant pressure the Empath lives under.
The fact that most Empaths aren’t driven clinically insane by the constant emotional flux they experience is testimony enough to their mental strength.
Myth #4 – Empaths are lazy.
Truth – We often lack mental, emotional and physical energy due to our intense empathetic ability to understand others.
Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) amongst other physical issues like headaches, insomnia and Fibromyalgia, have all been commonly attributed to Empaths.
If our minds are constantly overloaded with stress, tension and pressure, it therefore translates that our bodies are as well. This often results in sicknesses such as the ones mentioned above. Thus Empaths often lack the energy and therefore desire to do many things, preferring to relax (including taking naps) instead.
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If you’ve experienced any of these misperceptions in your life, please feel free to share your experiences below. Also, feel free to take our Empath Test or read our empath book to get more in-depth guidance. Being an Empath can certainly be riddled with setbacks, however, it’s invaluable to remember how much of an asset you are to the world. Our planet needs a balance of both hard and industrious people, and soft and empathetic people. You form an important part in this great Universal Balance.
If you would you some more free resources, check out our extensive collection of empath articles!
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This is unbelievably accurate. Throughout my entire life I’ve experienced all of this; people would often appear to me out of nowhere and unleash their emotional baggage unto me, even before opening their mouths, I could feel the emotions within them vibrating in the air like a song. Almost instantly, I instinctively mimicked how they felt. I found it indescribably draining on my entire being. Now I’ve created a thick wall around myself to protect against this and I reserve my help for the people I care most about. Moreover, within the first two minutes of meeting someone, I know what they yearn for, their dreams, thoughts and exactly what they desire from me. It’s a balanced gift, equal parts in curse and blessing, discovering this balance and finding the healthiest and most helpful way of utilising this gift has been an adventure that’s lasted a lifetime.
I too fell like an empath and I also am having trouble determining which type. It seems like a mixture. I tend to draw in people who are struggling and I use my energy to make them feel better. I attract Narcissist’s, one after another. I am totally over filled with emotion and I feel an overwhelming sense of this emotion and I cannot control it. It is everywhere always.
If I don’t make it to the 5th dimension soon maybe someone can help push us there.
I enjoy the efforts you have put in this, regards for all the great content .
I’m pretty sure I’m an Empath, but even after taking the quiz and reading several of your articles I’m not sure what kind. I am highly sensitive to souns (misoohonia) and smells and noise. I loved reading the bit here about being unable to watch a Nazi film. I cannot expose myself to visuals of atrocities or violence as they will haunt me. 4 years ago i stopped watching the news because of this. It’s to their point that if i entertain the real trouble of someone else, i almost feel like it’s happeningto me or i dread that it will. However, I’m actually not very good at sensing what other people are thinking or feeling in general (illnesses included). It has to be obviously visible for me to take it in. I’m not a great listener either. I’m consciously working on trying to be present for other people because i dwell on my own inner life a lot. I love solitude. I have 2 young children I’m with all day, and i can never get enough alone time to recharge completely. I have always needed more sleep than others. I feel most rested after 10 hours. As a child i had this weird sensation of excess energy around sharp corners of furniture. I’d walk around the dining room table “wrapping” the energy around my hands and distributing it evenly around the other corners. It passed with time, i rarely get that now, and it was never discouraged by my family. They thought it was a curious quirk. I’ve been on several spiritual quests and dark night of the soul after the birth of my daughter led to post partum depression and anxiety. The last couple of years ice been slowly making my way back to a place of peace and joy in the faith of my upbringing, though my family of origin are merely cultural Catholics for the most part. I have experienced God’s grace and consolation and presence and absolutely love my authentic Catholic faith now, among the main reasons being the fact that i can sense Jesus’s presence in the Eucharist. I’ve had a nun and priest interpret a recurring dream i had once on a retreat. I loved that they allowed me to experience the grace of God outside the confines of dogma. My dream walked me through the journey it would take fire my husband and me to overcome our infertility and have our 2 children. It included such information as the drama we’d have with a foster child first, and the fact that our children would only be born after the death of my best friend. I also had 2 specific premonition dreams. One alerted me to the fact that my great grandmother was being called home to God the next day, and the other altering me to the fact that my father had an accident the night before that resulted in a permanent brain injury. My husband, before being spiritual or religious, prayed for a life partner shortly before meeting me. Looking back, we’ve overcome what most couples wouldn’t, and we recently started mentoring engaged couples through our church. We are frequently reminded of how much closer children are to God, and our kids show us regularly that there’s a realm beyond what’s readily visible if we are only open to it. I know I’ve written a book here! But I’m so grateful for the opportunity to share some of these experiences and maybe someone could enlighten me based on what I’ve shared what kind of empath i am? I can be reached at anilorak 13 ska @ hotmail .com (no spaces). Thank you for letting me share.
Sorry * sounds (misophonia)
Major thanks for the blog. Really Great.
Knowledge is unbeatable
Hey Guys, I recognize a lot of what you are saying about feeling other peoples emotions and illness. It used to depress me, but not anymore. I make use of it in my workshop as an acupuncturist.
There are Manu was in which you can clear emotions that aren’t yours. You can make choices, based on what you are feeling.
First of all, realize if these emotions/thoughts/illness are yours OR not. If not then let go off them. There not upto you to carry them. These people have to deal with there own problems. Secondly you can let go of this negativity by visualizing how the emotions leave your body through your arms into water when washing them or being cared on the wind or leaving your body through your legs into the ground. Or simply giving it back to them.
If you want to be there for other people try to be compassie are and realize they have there own difficulties they have to deal with no matter how hard they are trying hide this under a cloack of popularity, success, money, denial, or even spirituality.
Give people a right on their own thoughts even if they are not in favor of you. Understand that they find it just as difficult as you.
And as a last thing give yourself the right to be you. Realize what it is that you are feeling. If this is anger realize that you want manifest yourself. If this is grieve realize what pain of is you need to let go off.
What helped me a lot is mindfulness, EFT and acupuncture.
Wishing you all the best in life.
Love Marjolein
I was recently told I was an empath. I usually do not try to live to label myself but I was curious and must say very fascinated now. My emotional climate has changed drastically recently and it’s taking its toll to say the least. I often have been finding myself short tempered or reclusive, that the world around me is not coinciding with me right now. I have been dismissed or talked down upon due to my mental status. But it makes complete felt sense to me, that when entering a clouded house, space or room that I will then feel the sludge. I will carry that sludge daily, making it some real overtime to go about my routine with popping energy. I often am told I am cold shouldered, when I am around cold people. I am picked on for things I feel, and those that do not understand will even pick and joke. It is a wonderful gift to be personable, in touch, understanding and strong. But only with the proper existential and self spirited practices because only with a fine tuned and well known balance is being an Empath a gift.
This is the first time I now understand what I have. I can literally feel anger. If someone is near me or even in the same room that is angry I can literally feel the vibration. I feel better being alone and have been my whole life. I sometimes feel great sadness out of nowhere. I thought everyone was like this.
I’ve been empathic my whole life and it’s a pain. I only feel others when it’s very strong. Some I can’t sense at all, some I get a feeling if they have a picture, if it’s strong enough I can feel how someone is if they’re across the street which is annoying. Mom used to call me fragile. My brother once called me cold when I try to separate what’s me vs others and once said just turn it off. I can’t. I can block it only so much then it comed rushing. One person called me eerie. I only met thay person once and still don’t know what that means. Experiencing the paranormal at times I’m more affected because I feel it more than see or hear which I have as a kid. I’m 58 and it seems the older I get the stronger it is and I knew I couldn’t deny what I am when looking for a house years ago I felt it was ‘off’. I had to dump two people who always dumped on me and I was just too overwhelmed. Emotional vampires really get me on edge. Being an empath is somewhat of a curse but reading of others comforts me knowing now that what I go through is normal for me. It wasn’t easy growing up. A cold brother who always gave me a chill just being near him, my late mother who was an extreme narcissist and my late father who allowed it, was tough. As far as I know there are no Empaths or those with psychic ability which I have of both, in the family so where it came is beyond me. Therr is one good thing about being an empath. You know when people B.S. you. I get a hollow chill when I know someone tries to B.S. me. You can’t say anything because they’d never admit it but I’ve yet to be wrong. You always know when someone lies. Someone whose naturally mean you know it even before they say anything. I literally shake. I find a strange peace with my dog and cat and doing my hobby art helps me purge what I feel when I’m around most people. I’m forced to go to most places when they’re least crowded so there are less people to sense. Night seems to be the most calming when I’m awake but it’s hard to sleep. Near an angry person I’m agitated. Hard to separate myself from that. At least I know I’m not crazy.