The only way to get over the pain is to face it, embrace it, hug it and learn the lessons embedded within it.
― Adele Theron
All of us, in some way or another, have experienced the stab of rejection, betrayal, neglect, bullying, and even humiliation at the hands of another.
But at what point does being emotionally hurt turn into becoming emotionally traumatized?
What is Emotional Trauma?

Emotional trauma occurs when you are exposed to a situation that is so extreme (e.g., horrendous betrayal from a loved one, the suicide of someone, etc.) that the body, heart, and mind struggle to handle the intense emotions that come with such a shocking experience.Â
As a result, the body-mind system tends to enter a freeze state, which is characterized by feelings of numbness, dissociation from reality, and the sudden or eventual appearance of intense symptoms like chronic anxiety, depression, addictions, PTSD, or other life-disrupting patterns.
Emotional trauma can also happen due to ongoing situations, such as being bullied, being trapped in an environment (such as in childhood) in which your sense of self-worth was destroyed or diminished, being repeatedly betrayed, treated cruelly, judged negatively, made fun of, and so on.Â
Experiencing abandonment trauma as a child is also a widespread form of emotional trauma.
Four Components of Trauma
Trauma is not what happens to us. But what we hold inside in the absence of an empathetic witness.
— Peter A Levine, PhD
According to psychotherapist and pioneer of Somatic Experiencing®, Peter Levine, there are four aspects of trauma that will be present, in some way, in all traumatized people:
- Hyperarousal (i.e., being overly alert and on guard)
- Constriction (i.e., tense body)
- Dissociation (i.e., disconnection from the here and now)
- Freezing (immobility), associated with the feeling of helplessness
I’ll be using these four components of trauma as a basis for the emotional trauma test below.
Emotional Trauma, Inner Work, and Spiritual Wellbeing
Discovering our level of emotional trauma is a crucial part of inner work, which is:
… the psychological and spiritual practice of diving deep into your inner self for the purposes of self-exploration, self-understanding, healing, and spiritual transformation.
{What is Inner Work?}
When we work to heal, resolve, or integrate the emotional trauma we carry, a tremendous amount of inner energy is freed up which allows us to grow and blossom in unimaginably beautiful and profound ways.
Healing emotional trauma, therefore, is a vital part of our awakening journeys of Soul Work as spiritual wanderers.
We often embark on this healing quest in stages five and six of the spiritual wanderer’s journey.
Emotional Trauma Test
Healing doesn’t mean the pain never existed. It means the damage no longer controls our lives.
– K. Salmansohn
The free emotional trauma test below isn’t meant to ‘diagnose’ you in any way. It’s simply a tool you can use to shed more light on your inner landscape.Â
Please use this test simply as a doorway to introspection and further action, not as a set-in-stone analysis of your character or what happened in your life.Â
Whatever result you get is not the absolute truth, and if you feel like it’s wrong, that is totally fine, because it might be!
Trust in your gut and your inner knowing above all else – this test only attempts (in an imperfect way) to provide you with some potential insight and healing pathways.Â
If, at any point, you feel uncomfortable during the process of taking this test, please step away, seek out support, grounding, and centeredness immediately. Only return to this test when you feel safe inside.
What did you get?
If you’re comfortable, I welcome you to share your results in the comments. You never know who might feel comforted by your words or presence.
Need more help? See my popular Self-Love Journal and Inner Child Work Journals if you’d like some compassionate support for working through these wounds.
Low Level of Emotional Trauma
I got high level of emotional trauma. I am actually not surprise even tho I’m really young I am the oldest and I feel that my parents love my sister more than me there are also other reasons.
High level emotional trauma
I got medium amount of emotional trauma. It makes sense. My parents were divorced when I was a baby, my dad was a manipulative shrew, and I’ve always felt locked in like a closed book, wanting to open, but seemingly, very uncomfortable to.
This inner child keeps popping up for me and after realizing that I had abandoned her, I seem to have abandoned her again. It is just too painful, too much emotions all at once it became overwhelming. I’m not sure I can do this alone again.
Iam very emotional and feeling
I have a medium level of emotional trauma, which I expected because my dad was an alcoholic most of my life. And my mom had cancer twice when I was a kid, along with a heart attack caused by medical malpractice during surgery. During the pandemic, I was still in school and my parents worked all day, even my mom despite cancer. We were lucky compared to most, (both my parents work in hospitals so they didn’t lose their jobs.) But it often left me alone all day every day, sitting by a computer doing nothing. And I wouldn’t go outside for weeks at a time. After the pandemic cooled down
I continued to isolate myself from people, but then I found some of the best friends I have ever had, people with who I was able to open up and be myself. My friends have really helped me get through things and I hope I have been able to do the same for them.
This article was very helpful to understand more about myself.
I took this same test about a year or so ago and had high levels of trauma. Because of the advice and help I have received from your guys on Lonerwolf, I’ve learnt how to deal with my demons and past traumas, anxiety, pain and fear of life and am now on the low level trauma level which is fantastic. I love you guys for giving me this strength to get things in perspective and look more positively at life in general rather than dwell on all the negative things of the past. I also used to take a lot of sh.t from people but have none of it anymore, my confidence is moving upwards. You guys know what you’re talking about and you care about people, a very rare thing these days so again, a huge thank you. xxxx
i’ve got the medium trauma level. a few years back, i’d prolly have the high level, but I’ve really been trying to get better. Drawing and writing poetry has really helped me through some hellish times. Anyone experiencing the same, doing hobbies that you love can really, really help you through hard times. Finding something that you love and holding onto it is really important. Keep doing what you love! Also, I hope you all are doing well! Don’t forget to drink water and keep being your awesome self. You’ve got this!! <3
I took the test and the result was that i have a high level of emotional trauma…which I already knew. I took the self worth test too and the results were were what i expected…i have none.