The Dark Night of the Soul is one of the most painful, isolating, and destabilizing experiences in life. Yet it is also a tremendous blessing in disguise.
As a primordial process of death and rebirth, the Dark Night of the Soul is a period in life where we are stripped of everything that is false.
The veils of illusion are torn from our eyes. We suddenly see the fragility of ourselves, other people, and existence itself.
Out of nowhere, we start asking big questions such as “What is the meaning of life?” “What happens after death?” and “Why was I born?”
The more we start to question our lives, the more deception we come across. We see the lies perpetuated by society.
We see the ways we have become wounded and behave dysfunctionally. And we may even notice a sense of emptiness inherent in our lives. Something feels missing. But what?
For many people, the Dark Night of the Soul heralds big life shifts. We may quit our jobs, leave our marriage, and seek out something more meaningful and aligned with who we truly are.
For some, the Dark Night is a call to begin the spiritual wanderer’s journey toward self-actualization, spiritual illumination (or enlightenment), and reconnecting with the Soul.
Dark Night of the Soul Questions
When people first enter this dark period of life, they often have many questions.
It can feel scary to lose interest in what you once valued and have your life turned upside down. Due to its destabilizing effect on our lives, the Dark Night is synonymous with what is known as the spiritual emergency.
Here are some commonly asked questions which might help to relax your mind a bit:
Most people who go through the Dark Night feel a sense of loneliness, isolation, anxiety, and depression. It’s common to crave solitude and quiet, comforting environments. While some describe the experience as a death and rebirth, others describe it as the feeling of disintegrating or falling through a void.
The Dark Night of the Soul is an experience that is unique to everyone (although it does share many common characteristics). For one person it may last a few months, for others, it may last a year or many years. Most importantly, please understand that this is a temporary experience, and many people can relate to what you’re experiencing. You’re not alone, although it might feel that way.
There are many ways to answer this question, but it’s crucial to understand first and foremost that the Dark Night is a natural and organic process. Just as trees go through a period of losing their leaves in Autumn/Winter, so too do we as humans (metaphorically speaking). We all go through cycles of death and rebirth – periods where we are full of life and energy and then periods where we need to slow down and go within. The Dark Night helps us to stop and tune into our inner selves. It is a process that goes hand-in-hand with the spiritual awakening process and finding our true life purpose.
Good question! Think of the Dark Night of the Soul as entering a prolonged Winter period. What comes after Winter? Spring! After the Dark Night, we emerge refreshed, renewed, and ready to walk our true life paths. This is known as the ‘Illumination‘ stage on the spiritual wanderer’s journey. In this period, we have gained clarity, wisdom, tenderness, and the ability to tune into ourselves thanks to the Dark Night period. These qualities we then bring into our lives. It’s quite common to start big projects, make powerful life changes, and explore our newly found gifts after the Dark Night of the Soul. It’s a blessing in disguise.
Dark Night of the Soul Test
Are you experiencing symptoms of loneliness, isolation, depression, and soul loss? Does it feel as though you’re cut off or totally disconnected from the Divine?
If so, you may be experiencing a Dark Night of the Soul. Take our free Dark Night of the Soul Test to confirm (or challenge) your suspicions below:
What result did you get? Feel free to share your results in the comments as well as any reflections.
If you need more in-depth guidance, see our Dark Night of the Soul Journal for more help.
What has your experience during the Dark Night been like so far? I’d love to hear from you below. Your words might inspire or support someone else on this difficult journey.
I feel like I have being experiencing dark night of the soul my whole life, feeling different, alone, close to children, animals, and nature; I care deeply and i feel other people’s pain, even strangers; i mourn the loss of life every day, even as a child. I am highly intuitive and curious about paranormal experiences, having experienced some myself. i pray to god. I believe i will experience the end of this world. i believe in reincarnation, soul mates, and twin flames. There are no accidents in life, everything is for a reason. Even though I believe in god, and am still afraid; i have always been afraid.
This resonates with me. But I realised lately that I also (may) suffer dysthymia for most of my life, which makes me wonder if dysthymia is in many cases the label that western medicine puts on people who actually go through the dark night of the soul. The signs seem all the same and I strongly believe that psychology and psychiatry are desperate to explain spiritual experiences and tag those as ‘mental diseases’. Right now so many people need psychological help, because for what I feel the whole world goes through a universal dark night of the soul in order to move into the fifth dimension as so many people arent prepared for it, being denied to use their innate spiritual gifts. I have been looking into your ebooks for many many times without taking any actions, because I have been so disappointed in almost every ebook I ordered online lately. Rest assured I do not have any doubt about the quality of your ebooks! I just need to motivate myself. But I think the current stage I am in will do. Right now I am at a crossroad that I really need to act upon, I see our world… Read more »
I’ve been experiencing the dark night of the soul for so many years now. Where will it lead? When will it stop? I feel quite stuck where I am in life. But at the same time, my spiritual journey is ongoing. Sometimes crawling, other times more fulfilling and even wonderful. But most of the time, I feel stuck. Why? I don’t understand why nothing happens. I mean, it’s over a decade now, well about 15 years, and most of that time have been truly dark. I feel good right now, and I have good times, but I am very alone and don’t have anything even close to purpose. My life is meaningful in many ways – but I don’t know what I am supposed to do, with anything. Love feels far away, I’m 42 and don’t have any kids, don’t want to or do I? Don’t know for sure. I know that I long for my soulmate, but mostly I long for purpose. The spiritual awakening process with its several stages back and forth is hard enough, but since I always end up back in the dark night over and over again it’s almost too hard. What can I do?… Read more »
I feel the dark night of the soul is apart of my life. I get depression from telepathic messages, I think
I’ve connected with a lower vibration as the messages I’m sent is sometimes evil visions and telepathy plus iv experienced teleportation which freaked me out. I want to find a excellent hipnotherapist who can check what’s going on with me, any suggestions? I wake up every morning with the weight of the world on my shoulders. I’m told telepathically if I don’t stop eating, drinking, start prayering I won’t evolve to the next level. This is extremely brief description of my daily interaction with other beings. I feel alone with no one I can share these experiences with. I’ve kept a journal of all my experiences so if something should happen to me, it’s all there in my book. I was a opiod user up to a year and half ago as I was in pain emotionally and physically as I was able to handle listening to these other beings now I’m straight I find I fear sometimes listening to them as they give future outcomes and some of them arn’t positive end times! Your suggestions please. Lov taniaxx
Hi Luna and Sol I have been looking at your website for a while. The Inner Child info helped me identify some negative experiences, not from my parents who were normal and loving, but from boarding school- a bullying headmistress whose actions were exactly opposite to her Christian teachings. So I sought some psychological help- havening- not because I’m particularly miserable, but because I want to be more resilient so I can help others- but it did really help me love myself, to realise I don’t have to be constantly achieving in order not to be seen as ” the bad girl,” to realise this in my heart not just my head. I have had a long Dark Night of the Soul over a number of years due to multiple deaths of close family and friends, starting with my partner dying suddenly beside me in bed. As you identify, I have had many years of spiritual seeking, my values have turned upside down although I still struggle with societal and family expectations of making money and being employed and useful, despite now seeing money, reputation and profession as fairly irrelevant. Throughout this I have struggled with finding joy again. More… Read more »
It’s been since 2017 for me…super intense times…major depression what used to ease the pain no longer works I’ve been running too long I’ve lost my voice somewhere in the darkness but I keep getting up and going again …I have literally been in physc ward 15 times maybe more my life is….how did I get here?? To this point? Where have I been for 40 some years? What the he’ll were u thinking?? Oh careful..saying what U think gets u put away! But there is hope folks! things could b worse for me I have got to get myself together! Spiritually financially emotionally mentally physically. I’m just trying to let it all fall away ..whatever no longer serves me just fall away .thanks a lot
I love Loner Wolf posts! They are interesting, and gives me ideas to improve my life. I’ve been reading from this website for several years. I have found though, as I have aged, I’m 67 now, that some of the things discussed such as a ‘dark night of the soul’ are just part the normal aging process. In exploring the test/quiz above most of my symptoms of a dark night of the soul, are simply the normal consequences of moving into my retirement years. I do experience some loneliness as my children are now grown and I don’t get to see them as much. They are busy being terrific parents to their own children, and pursuing interesting careers of their own. I have my own activities and friendships, but my aging body and arthritis doesn’t allow all the activities I once enjoyed. Perhaps it would be interesting to have an article or directed us, the older loner ‘gray’ wolves to spiritually fulfill our lives and reassure us that we are valid members of your community too. Plus it could be a whole new market share to the loner wolf organization.
I know I am experiencing a VEEERRYY deep long Dark Night of the Soul. I am exhausted and whatever I do or feel or experience seems it will never end… I’ve lost everything that was ever dear to me, and I mean everything: My home, my job, my family, I’ve been just a tiny step away from homelessness, utterly alone in the world as pretty much everyone has turned their backs onto me, including my sons, my wealthy narcissist father and everyone that ever dared to call themselves my friend: gone. the sheer brutal loneliness is absolutely overwhelming. I am tired, really tired of the barely survival state struggle as, workwise and foodwise I have survived from handouts and small jobs here and there. It has been over 11 years since it started, so believe me I have tried everything in the book that has come close for me to try: everything. Sure, I have survived, barely, as I have seriously considered not to. But I am still going, for whatever long and under which ever circumstances may allow me to do so. I have tried to keep my head up, surrendering to what is, to the moment, grasping onto… Read more »
I feel confused, and life has seemed to have little meaning and purpose lately. I understand that unconditional love is part of the higher purpose, but how can I love everybody unconditionally in a conditional world? It’s so… confusing!!! I had no idea I was going through a fourth dark night of the soul. Yes, a fourth one. I’ve already been through three, why would I want a fourth one again? Ugh so annoying. I need to find meaning and purpose in life. I guess even us rainbow starseeds go through dark nights every once in a while. I know I watched a fellow rainbow starseed, therainbowalpaca, talk about her experience with self-cutting and a suicide attempt, and she was helpful in the sense that I know I am not the only one who goes through a dark night of the soul; however, I experienced different things, like insomnia, delusion, and detachment from reality, during the previous dark nights. This dark night is different, however, in that I am needing to take action and find meaning and purpose in life, and that without it, life feels confusing, sad, and seems to be directionless. I’ve been attempting to find a direction… Read more »
Whew!!!! For the longest time, I thought I was going stir crazy. I felt crazy internally. It was the most uncomfortable emotional place I have EVER been in. I have been in this Dark Night of the Soul place since February 22, 2020 but it started February 14, 2020. September is when I felt better. Felt more like myself but not really. Hard to explain. I now know that I was/am having a spiritual awakening. Things tasted different. I picked up bike riding again. I lost 50 pounds. I embraced my natural hair. I embraced who I was previously as compared to who I feel like I am becoming. 2020 has been a clusterfuck but I am positioned to believe that it was a blessing in disguise. I was completely devastated the day the rug was pulled from under me. My sense of security was shaken. I questioned my place on this earth. I literally wanted to die but the universe told me to hold on and that’s exactly what I did. I have my moments when I think back to key moments of 2020 and get sad but I definitely do not want to repeat the year or events.… Read more »