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ยป Home ยป Turning Inwards

9 Ways to Access Your Inner Strength During Traumatic Times

by Aletheia Luna ยท Updated: Apr 2, 2025 ยท 25 Comments

Image of a woman with a butterfly on her face symbolizing inner strength

Almost all of us have experienced some kind of traumatic or shocking event.

When I speak of trauma, I donโ€™t always mean extreme situations such as natural disasters, instances of abuse, rape, murder, and accidents.

While traumatic experiences often are severe and horrific, they can also be seemingly โ€œmundaneโ€ experiences such as losing a job, daily stress, divorcing, and moving somewhere foreign.


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Trauma also can, and often does, come as a result of the spiritual awakening process in which our entire self-concept begins to crumble and weโ€™re thrown into the abyss of an existential crisis.

Trauma is unique for each person. While we might find changing jobs just another daily task, another person may find the switch highly distressing. We should be very careful about judging other people when it comes to trauma. Every person is different and possesses different levels of sensitivity.

Table of contents

  • 11 Signs Youโ€™re Going Through a Traumatic Experience
  • The Importance of Tapping Into Your Inner Strength
  • 9 Ways to Access Your Inner Strength During Traumatic Experiences
  • What Now?

11 Signs Youโ€™re Going Through a Traumatic Experience

Image of a traumatized shadow ghost behind the curtains

A traumatic experience is anything that severely threatens your emotional, psychological or physical well-being.

Essentially, trauma is anything that causes us to feel like weโ€™re losing or have lost control.

Feeling traumatized is often accompanied by the experiences of feeling:

  1. Numb or disconnected from the world
  2. Sad and hopeless
  3. Anxious and fearful
  4. Hypervigilance (constantly looking out for danger)
  5. Confused and unable to concentrate
  6. Shocked and/or in denial
  7. Angry or rageful
  8. Moody and irritable
  9. Guilty or ashamed
  10. Self-loathing
  11. The need to withdraw from others

The danger with coming to terms with the fact that you have been traumatized is the tendency to adopt the role of a victim โ€“ also known as a victim mentality.

If you have read this list and discovered that youโ€™re going through a traumatic experience, I want to invite you to notice the tendency to start attaching to the idea that youโ€™re a victim. While itโ€™s important that we come to terms with our trauma, it is very harmful, disempowering, and addictive to start thinking of yourself as a victim who is at the mercy of others/life. It’s much more empowering to see yourself as a survivor/warrior, than a victim.


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The Importance of Tapping Into Your Inner Strength

Image of a woman with a butterfly on her face symbolizing inner strength

Trauma is essentially what happens when we feel totally powerless, and are frozen internally into that state of being.

But hereโ€™s the liberating truth: power comes from within. Whatever goes on outside of you is nothing compared to the courage, clarity, and compassion that already lies within your Soul.

Learning how to tap into your inner strength โ€“ the power of your inner wolf โ€“ is really about developing self-compassion. When youโ€™re able to access this self-compassion, you will discover that nothing can truly harm you, because nothing can take away the untouchable divine strength of your inner Self. And when you realize that nothing can truly hurt you at your core, you will feel empowered and able to deal with anything that comes your way.

9 Ways to Access Your Inner Strength During Traumatic Experiences

Image of a happy person near the ocean at sunset bursting with inner strength

Like most people, I have gone through traumatic experiences such as emotional abuse, having a drug-addicted mother, going through a spiritual awakening process, dealing with mentally ill family members, feeling like Iโ€™m going crazy myself, among many other things.

Two of the most powerful and life-changing tools I discovered during these dark times were self-love and thought inquiry. Learning to take care of myself with loving kindness and discovering that believing thoughts actually create suffering freed me from a lot of anger, fear, and shame.

Here are some key ways to access your inner strength during periods of extreme stress, illness, loss, vulnerability, and pain:

1. Treat yourself with love and compassion

Notice the tendency for the inner critic to start judging you for โ€œnot having it all togetherโ€ or for โ€œbeing weak.โ€ Counteract any critical thought with compassionate and encouraging words. For example, you might say to yourself, โ€œItโ€™s OK to feel this way,โ€ โ€œIโ€™m doing the best I can,โ€ โ€œI love you no matter what,โ€ or โ€œIโ€™m here for you.โ€ How would you speak to a child who has experienced what you have gone through? If it helps, address your kindness to your inner child. Treat yourself with love and compassion. (If you need more help learning how to be self-nurturing, explore these inner child healing exercises in our Inner Child Journal or try some of our step-by-step guided Self-Love Journal.)

2. Allow yourself to feel what you feel

One of the greatest causes of long-term suffering is the repression of our emotions. While itโ€™s not always possible to feel our emotions after a traumatic circumstance, it is vital at some point to re-experience anything that we have shut away inside. Whatever we repress or suppress tends to have a way of building up within us like volcanic lava. At some point, we need to let it all out, and this will either happen consciously and intentionally โ€“ or as a catastrophic unconscious reaction to something that triggers us (just like a volcanic eruption).

In order to โ€œfeel it to heal itโ€ you need to find a healthy form of catharsis. For instance, you might seek out a therapist to speak with, practice journaling, explore art therapy or even delve into more traditional forms of catharsis such as crying, screaming or physical workout (such as punching).

3. Breathe deeply

During traumatic circumstances, our minds tend to race and our breathing becomes shallow. The more shallow our breathing becomes, the more anxiety we feel, and the more our minds go crazy โ€“ย and vice versa. To break this loop, breathe slowly, softly, and deeply into your stomach. Deep breathing exercises stimulate the vagus nerve in the body which sends signals to the brain to calm down. If youโ€™re struggling to breathe deeply, try noticing your in-breath and out-breath. Mindfully focus on the sensations in your body and what it feels like to be scared. If you can, try to become curious about what is happening in your mind and body. If you’re feeling extremely wired-up, find one part of your body that feels relaxed and grounded (that could be your big toe, your ear lobe, your hands, your shins โ€“ anything). Focus on this part of your body and feel the anxious energy dissipate within you. Breathing deeply and paying mindful attention helps to create more space inside of you to calm down and become balanced again.

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4. Go slowly

Working, moving, and speaking quickly tends to add to the stress we feel during painful circumstances. Allow yourself to slow down and reduce the tempo. Give yourself the space to process what is happening. Notice your addiction to working quickly and how it tends to cause the mind to get lost in thoughts of the past and future. Do one thing at a time, and ignore people who try to pressure you. Your health and mental wellbeing are paramount. The world wonโ€™t end if you slow down, but it will feel better to inhabit.

5. Let go of self-victimizing thoughts

Image of a scared and traumatized man who struggles to find his inner strength

When we believe our thoughts, we suffer. But hereโ€™s the thing: your thoughts donโ€™t actually mean anything about you unless you believe they do. Thoughts are simply fluctuations of energy. We donโ€™t control our thoughts, otherwise, donโ€™t you think we would always choose to think happy thoughts? We canโ€™t even predict what the next five thoughts in our head will be. Therefore, if we donโ€™t control our thoughts, how can we actually be our thoughts? How can our thoughts be true?

The root cause of all suffering is believing and identifying with thoughts instead of witnessing them and letting them go. When we experience trauma, the mind tends to create thoughts about how terrible our lives are and begins to create an identity around suffering (known as the victim complex). The moment we begin believing self-victimizing and self-pitying thoughts is the precise moment we experience intense suffering. But when we notice and become aware of these thoughts, and donโ€™t identify with them, we donโ€™t suffer.

Learning how to access your inner strength is about teaching yourself to become aware of these intrusive thoughts and realize that they only mean something if you believe they do. Otherwise, these thoughts come and go without hassle or worry. One of the best ways to stop identifying with your thoughts is through a regular meditation practice and self-inquiry. I recommend Scott Kiloby and Byron Katie as two excellent self-inquiry teachers.

6. Remember a situation in the past that you survived

If you’re struggling to trust your inner strength, try recalling a tough situation in the past that you got through. Simply remembering that you got through something difficult in the past can help strengthen your resolve in the present.

7. Ask for guidance

Asking for help isnโ€™t a sign of weakness, itโ€™s actually a sign of inner strength! When you seek help, you are being courageous and admitting that you donโ€™t have all the answers, which is perfectly normal. Try seeking support from a trusted loved one, trained therapist or praying to a higher power such as your Soul. (See this article on the power of prayer for more help.) If you are in desperate need of guidance, I recommend seeking out a therapist.

8. Keep in mind that everything passes

No matter how much pain or suffering youโ€™re going through right now, remember that everything passes, everything. Think back to a problem you had in the past, perhaps five or ten years ago. Where is that problem now? By reminding yourself of the philosophy โ€œthis too shall passโ€ you will bring yourself out of the narrow focus of the mind to see a bigger picture.

9. Connect with your Soul

Your Soul is the very core and essence of who you truly are. It’s at the very center of your being: the place that is full of your own unique spark of Divinity. Many describe the Soul as a feeling of deep inner knowing, unfathomable self-love, boundless compassion, deep wisdom, and profound strength.

The reason why so many of us feel lost in life is that we’ve lost touch with our Soul essence, and as a result, experience Soul loss. How many times have you felt the longing to return home? To find inner peace? To break free? This is a call from the Soul inviting you back home. This is your Soul trying to open a doorway to expanded consciousness โ€“ to wake up out of the dream that so many of us fall into within society.

One of the simplest and most direct ways to reconnect with your Soul is through a practice known as Mirror Work. The mirror, traditionally, is a mystical object that shows us reality, plain and clear. What better way to rediscover the truth of who you really are?

When we glance into the mirror we come in contact with the windows of our Soul: the eyes. By gazing into our eyes, and calling on the presence of our Souls, it is quite easy to experience a sense of peace, well-being, trust, and love.

However, Mirror Work can often show us inner parts that make us feel uncomfortable or embarrassed. It’s common to have self-loathing, critical, and judgmental feelings and thoughts while looking at ourselves in the mirror. That’s why Mirror Work is well accompanied by some form of Shadow Work (or looking at our dark side).

If you’d like to attempt this practice, see our article on Mirror Work for more in-depth guidance.

What Now?

Mindful Self-Compassion

Now that you have explored how to access your inner strength, focus on one of the points above that appeals to you. Try to dedicate the next week to implementing whatever point of advice you choose and notice how you feel.

Most importantly, remember that self-compassion and thought inquiry are essential tools for tapping into the innate strength you carry. At first, it can be hard to believe that you carry strength within you at all, and this is because the mind tends to obscure your Soul with thoughts. However, the more you become aware of these destructive thoughts, the more you will feel your natural inner radiance shine like an eternal sun.


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Cultures and spiritual traditions through the ages have called this inner presence your Buddha Nature, Higher Self, Consciousness, God/Goddess, Atman, and Soul. This sacred place within you is the source of all love, strength, peace, and understanding you need.

My hope is that this article can help you find relief from suffering. Please share whatever has helped you overcome trauma below.

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About Aletheia Luna

Aletheia Luna is a prolific psychospiritual writer, author, educator, and intuitive guide whose work has touched the lives of millions worldwide. As a survivor of fundamentalist religious abuse, her mission is to help others find love, strength, and inner light in even the darkest places. She is the author of hundreds of popular articles, as well as numerous books and journals on the topics of Self-Love, Spiritual Awakening, and more. [Read More]

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  1. Julia says

    March 29, 2020 at 12:12 am

    Thank you so much! I cannot express how much your articles have helped me over the years. You always help me feel less alone and more open to whatever Iโ€™m feeling. You are doing such beautiful and important work for the world!

    Reply
  2. Chelle says

    March 28, 2020 at 4:22 am

    At a time when helplessness is being felt globally, strength is hard to find. This article couldn’t have presented at a better time for me; so much so that I didn’t finish reading it right away because one of the suggestions spoke so loudly that I just ran with it – and it WORKED!
    THANK YOU, Thank You, thank you for this one!

    Reply
  3. Paola says

    March 26, 2020 at 1:32 am

    Thank You !

    Reply
    • magaline says

      March 27, 2020 at 12:42 am

      I have personally experienced more trauma, loss, grief, and horror than I can even began to list. I left my body back last summer and spring in 2019 twice but it was the very thing that showed me how to be my own saving grace, instead of through another person. I learned that I was creating my own hell that was also, effecting everyone around me and bouncing back towards me, and then my spirit next to me whispered in my soul, you are creating your own hell, then it hit me, but I can also create my own heaven. Since then, I found enormous strenth, by remembering how I overcame things many years and that helped me to realize, what I did in my past and what changed, that I was not doing anymore. It was prayer, faith and meditation and I had a positive outlook and full of confidence and courage. I had to literally stop talking to myself in a negative manner and stop believing that I was unloveable. I had to consistently tell myself every time a negative thought came, I turned it around and said a very positive statement to my self. Things have improved a lot since last year. Dont wish to tell the entire story but I learned real fast always be kind to yourself and stop poisoning my mind, with negative self talk and to, believe, recieve and accept all the positives that bounces back towards me. I was not listening to my intution and now I do. If your thoughts, the mind, is inline with your heart and matches up, thats the answer I need to trust. If it is not in match, then its not the right answer or not the right time for it. That is what I call my soul, when the two are matched. I learned through going into deep breathing meditating, thinking of nothing deeply within myself through meditation and prayer and reached my higher self. I am the God of my own life. I am the creator and the destroyer of my life. I still have a lot to learn. I loved this article and I think you are right on target and looking forward to what lies ahead. Namaste

      Reply
  4. Elle-Jay says

    March 24, 2020 at 11:58 pm

    Fabulous! Another fantastic article with lots of great advice. Stay strong fellow humans, this too shall pass…if we allow negative thoughts and fear to overcome us we will โ€œworry ourselves sick โ€œ. I believe this is part of humanity slowing down, learning to appreciate what we have; letting go of capitalism and hurting the planet. I wish everyone well in this period of change

    Reply
  5. Ariana says

    March 24, 2020 at 10:08 pm

    Thank you SO much! :-) <3 I do energy work – releasing. The dark, heavy energies out, the light ones in – it changes my feelings and thoughts by itself. (It could be yoga, 5 tibetans, meditation music…) And I'm also very connected to my soul – the big, gentle, warm, smiling mother :-).

    Reply
  6. Irena Paz says

    August 06, 2017 at 10:43 pm

    Great article! Touches on many concepts, some new to me! I can’t wait to explore more and do some soulwork! I’m ready for it!

    Reply
    • Mateo Sol says

      March 23, 2020 at 6:39 am

      I’m glad you found some value in it Irena, I look forward to hearing how you go :)

      Reply
  7. Charles says

    July 22, 2017 at 8:55 am

    I kind of feel the need to withdraw from my family not friends though. On June 1st, I had a Grand Mal Seizure and the medication they gave me caused me to hallucinate some and talk of being in the Kingdom with God. Now they think I am crazy. for what? having a grand mal seizure and not being in control. that does hurt a lot. I often cry myself to sleep. try so hard to stay positive with family but it gets very hard because of their narrow minded ways. They do not believe in past lives although I showed them from the Bible where Yeshua said, If you can accept it, John the Baptist is Elijah come again. Does this not prove that past lives are real. Man my family are so narrow minded.

    Reply
  8. Violet says

    July 22, 2017 at 7:53 am

    Thank you! Great advice. Going slowly, feeling, allowing and self compassion have helped me a lot through a number of long dark nights of the soul (years rather than nights!) . I think one of the most vital aspects of this process is allowing, just allowing the thoughts and feelings to arise without condemnation, without the belief we shouldn’t have them, should be better/stronger/wiser/more spiritual blah blah blah. There are no shoulds in healing and I think 99% of life here is a healing journey until we are fully evolved so condemning any aspect just adds to the overall wound burden. Thank so much and BIG LOVE <3

    Reply
    • Mateo Sol says

      March 23, 2020 at 6:34 am

      Thank you Violet. I completely agree with the “should’s”, this type of judgment by our inner critic is at the source of all of our self-loathing, it’s a toxic shame that often paralyzes us in inaction. I appreciate you sharing your insights :)

      Reply
  9. Julie says

    July 22, 2017 at 3:07 am

    I think this is good advice. Largely though when people are in the depths they often need to find another who will make time for them. Many healers are wounded. Poor primary relationships and family Karma seems to be a common training ground for energy healers. Cleansing is very much required but not always straight forward. This website is a testimony to wise words and plants seeds. It is a positive aspect of communication yet we need humans too. Esotericists are supposed to work things out for themselves, yet when a person is in the grip of dislocation and not sure of the firmness of the terrain, vulnerable rather than victim is a brewer term to use. Labelling oneself a victim or being labelled such is not helpful. We all play roles. You do offer common sense ways of coping. I admire that. Thank you. We are not in Aquarius yet though and people still need people. We need to carry enough in our water sacks to help our brothers yet have one hand free to hold his hand until he can balance alone.

    Reply
  10. Fenris Lyulf says

    July 11, 2017 at 10:26 pm

    Thank you for this article. I have severe PTSD and it is so hard to live with that I get extremely depressed. But after I read articles like this one I feel empowered and believe I can get better.

    Reply
    • Mateo says

      July 12, 2017 at 9:43 am

      Thanks Fenris for sharing your experience. It makes it worth the work to know our articles have such powerful and positive effects in peoples journeys toward inner freedom.

      As you become more open toward these inner workings you’ll find access to boundless courage that is hidden inside, behind the fears of your own greatness. :)

      Reply
      • Fenris Lyulf says

        July 12, 2017 at 11:51 am

        Oh my. Thank you for acknowledging my reply. You are helping to change this world for the better and for that I am most grateful.

        Reply
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