What is the meaning of life? We are terrified by the question and at the same time, madly thrilled by it.
Itโs an age-old, primordial question at the heart of all humanity.
Whatโs the point of going through all this fuss? Why were we born? Why do we die? WHY does everything exist anyway?
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If you’ve come to this page, you’re likely at a crossroads in life. You might feel lost and completely without a clue as to what your true calling is.
Perhaps you’ve searched for years, but nothing quite “fit” or seemed right. Or perhaps, you’ve only begun the search recently and feel completely stranded, overwhelmed, and demoralized.
Deep down, you want to make your life mean something. You want to dedicate your time to doing what you love. But HOW?
WHERE do you start?
Wanting to know what the meaning of life is can be compared to opening a humungous can of worms: question after question comes spilling out. Pretty soon, weโre curled up in the fetal position choking on a huge existential crisis grub.
Sound macabre? Thatโs not half of it.
Wondering โwhat is the meaning of life?โ is often at the core of dark and dreary human experiences such as the Dark Night of the Soul, identity crisis, and existential depression.
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Sometimes, the more we search for answers, the more they evade us, leaving us feeling hopelessly lost and like victims of life.
In this article, I plan to help you move through these complex and frustrating emotions (to the best of my ability) so that you can feel empowered again. By the end of this article you should:
- Be able to understand the difference between meaning and purpose
- Possess a greater sense of clarity
- (Hopefully) feel a sense of relief
- Know what to do with your life next โ and how
By the way, I also recorded this article in audio/visual form. If you prefer to listen rather than read, you can do that here:
Table of contents
The Major Difference Between Life Meaning and Life Purpose
People from all walks of life share an innate drive for meaning, direction, and purpose. This drive to understand our life purpose seems as important to our psychological growth as eating is to our biological survival.
โ Dan Millman
You probably use them interchangeably โ and have heard others do likewise โ but meaning and purpose are not the same things.
Itโs important to make clear distinctions here because otherwise our โwhat is the meaning of life?โ exploration will become tremendously convoluted very quickly.
Hereโs how I distinguish the two:
Life meaning is of the mind โ itโs a philosophy, idea, or belief we ascribe to our lives. Itโs subjective. Itโs something you create.
Life purpose is innate โ ย itโs โprogrammedโ into everything at a core level. Itโs objective. Itโs something you fulfill.
Does that make sense?
When talking about the meaning of life we often confuse and mix up the subjective and objective (or personal and impersonal). Hence why it can feel like our brains have been put through a blender when even considering the topic.
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Again, to clarify:
Meaning is subjective. It comesย from the mind. It is dependent on your personal tastes, desires, goals, and dreams.
Purpose, on the other hand, is from Spirit. It is programmed into us. It is within our very cells. It is written into each and every destiny. We’ll explore this distinction a little more later.
But first, to go more in-depth into this topic, what is the meaning of life? And what does that mean for you? Letโs explore that next:
What is the MEANING of Life?
So … what is the meaning of life?
To put it simply, meaning itself is very personal and varied. Itโs something that emerges from your soul as a deep calling.
For one person, their meaning in life may be to raise kids, for another, their meaning may be to create a charity, or breed horses, or become a world-renown artist, or live off the grid, and so on.
Your meaning can be fixed or it can change.
Ultimately, your core essence (i.e., your heart and soul) will know what your true meaning in life is.
To find your meaning, youโll need to do some soul searching. Youโll need to understand yourself, your gifts and weaknesses, your passions, and your interests.
This process of soul searching is an exciting process โ but it can also be frustrating and disheartening if the voice of your soul is getting drowned out by the stress of daily life.
Weโll explore how to find your meaning in life a little later.
But first:
What is the PURPOSE of Life?
Our soulโs purpose, seen energetically, is already there, within us.
โ Christa Mackinnon
As I mentioned above, while your meaning of life is subjective, your purpose in life is more objective.
In other words, itโs not something you have to create or find. Instead, your purpose is something you realize or tune into.
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Because itโs already there, because itโs already intrinsic and innate to who you are, thereโs no need to go chasing anything.
Isnโt that kind of a relief?
If you’re still in doubt, let me explain further.
You might be wondering, “so what is this innate purpose of life?”
In an earthly sense, your purpose is the same as everything you see around you: to grow, change, and expand.
Just look at the plants, animals, and trees; they all go through cycles of metamorphosis. The planets also go through cycles, as do the seasons. And the Universe is expanding every moment! You too are destined to go through these cycles of expansion.
But is that it?
Those skeptical about the spiritual dimension of life would shout a hearty, โyes!โ But Iโm not an atheist. I donโt have a mechanistic outlook nor do I believe that this is โallโ there is.
Why reduce the complexity of life in that way? I have personally experienced the spiritual dimension of reality many times, and that is enough for me. And so too have millions since the dawn of time.
However, as the spiritual purpose of life is immaterial, itโs more open to interpretation. (Hence why there are thousands of spiritual movements and religious ideas in the world.)
Personally, I believe that our purpose in life is to mature or expand on ALL levels: the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual.
The spiritual awakening process is an expression of that maturation process: our souls are expanding and growing just like the galaxies. And like pregnancy or childbirth, this growth can be a painful process. But itโs part of lifeโs purpose.
As professor of cultural anthropology and religious studies, Bonnie Glass-Coffin writes,
As I have come to realize through my lifeโs journey, the purpose of our human embodiment is, actually, to grow a soul. Like the making of a body during nine months of gestation, soul-making is also a process. For, although we are born with it, our soul continues to develop with every life experience. Our sufferings are simply the secretions that add to its lusterโlike a pearl inside an oyster. Making soul is the process of a lifetime, or several lifetimes. Mystics, saints, and shamans of ages past and of today, from places far and near, refer to this eternal sojourn in many ways, yet whatever terms are used implies a conscious engagement with our true potential as divine partners in creation. This is what it means to โgrow a soul.โ This is what it means to commune with our essential nature.
On a metaphysical level, the question can be asked, โWhat are we maturing toward?โ What is the point of all this hassle?
This is a complex topic, but in a nutshell, to summarize many spiritual and religious ideas, our metaphysical purpose is to unite with our True Nature or to become one with the Divine.
Ancient spiritual traditions all throughout the world affirm this conclusion and have referred to such a culmination by many names: Enlightenment, Illumination, Self-Realization, Heaven, Oneness, Nirvana, Bliss, Wholeness, Moksha, non-dual awareness, Buddhahood, and so on.
How do we get there?
Thatโs a topic for a whole other article. But there’s a multitude of spiritual and religious paths that will suit you based on your mental/emotional/spiritual level of maturity.
Meditation is a common and recommended path. Inner work is another powerful practice that we heavily focus on within this website. It is a non-dogmatic practice that can be integrated into any belief system. The healing and inner transformation it can produce are quite amazing.
How to Find Your Meaning in Life (7 Paths)
Life has no meaning. Each of us has meaning and we bring it to life. It is a waste to be asking the question when you are the answer.
โ Joseph Campbell
So far weโve established the clear difference between what is the meaning vs. purpose of life.
As weโve seen, meaning is subjective, it is highly personal, it is something your soul feels called to do or create.
To find your meaning in life, you need to learn how to find yourself. Youโll need to do some soul searching.
If you have no idea how to do that, here are some simple pathways:
1. Think back to what you loved doing as a child
Your inner child is your original self, the first version of โyouโ that entered the world. S/he holds a tremendous amount of wisdom that is just waiting to be accessed.
As children, we didnโt carry the same level of baggage, social conditioning, or fears that we now lug around everywhere. We were free spirits. As such, reconnecting with your inner child is a powerful way of finding your meaning in life.
When you were a child, you were attracted to the things that brought you the most joy. This joy is often the secret key you need to uncover your authentic life path.
Reflect on what you loved doing the most as a child โ what activities did you always gravitate toward?
Perhaps you liked to read a lot, construct things, dress up your dolls, care for your toys, climb trees, talk to your pets, pretend you were a police officer, construct imaginary realms, and so on.
Take some time to carefully think about what you most enjoyed doing. Get a journal and make some notes. Look for the activities you did for the longest amount of time and most consistently.
The answer may not slap you in the face immediately, but think about what was the heart and core of the activity you did. What quality were you attracted to the most?
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2. Explore your personality (by taking tests)
I know this suggestion may sound banal, but free personality tests are a wonderful way of getting to know yourself. Plus, theyโre fun! Not only do you get to learn about your strengths and weaknesses, but you’re growing in self-understanding in a matter of minutes.
Not all free tests online are created equal. As our whole website is dedicated to the pursuit of self-awareness and self-knowledge, youโll find some unique tests in our free tests area.
As always, take these tests with โa grain of salt.โ Gather what you need and leave the rest. You never quite know what unique things may be revealed about yourself and how this may guide your life onwards!
3. Expand your mental horizons
We all have a โcircle of competenceโ โ a phrase coined by tycoons Warren Buffet and Charlie Munger. What this means is that we all have some things that weโre really knowledgeable about, and other things we arenโt.
Expanding your mental horizons means widening your circle of competence. This could mean exploring a topic you know literally nothing about. Also, this could mean delving into an area that youโve always been secretly curious about but have stopped yourself from exploring (for one reason or another).
Take a moment to think about what you would like to learn about if you were given a chance. What thought first pops into your mind? Whatever that thought is reveals the place you need to go next.
Even if you feel silly, be an explorer. Soul searching isnโt always convenient or comfortable โ instead, it is often wildly unexpected and can be supremely illuminating, particularly if youโre wanting to find your meaning in life.
4. Think about what life has taught you
We are each given a set of experiences in life. The experiences are neutral. They have no meaning. It is how we interpret the experiences that gives them meaning. The interpretations of experiences shape our beliefs and theories about the world. Our beliefs and theories, in turn, determine what we observe in the world to confirm our beliefs, which, in turn, reinforce our interpretations.
โ Michael Michalko
Ultimately, answering โwhat is the meaning of life?โ comes down to how you think about and interpret life. Do you ever think about the experiences youโve had? Do you ever give them a higher meaning? If not, itโs time to do that.
One of the most powerful ways to find your meaning is to reflect on the entire timeline of your life. What have been your major highs and lows? What successes and tragedies have befallen you? And most of all, what have they TAUGHT you?
If you can answer this single question โwhat have all your experiences in life taught you?โ and take a higher perspective, you might just find your meaning in life.
For example, if you believe all your experiences have taught you to surrender and let go, you might become interested in studying Zen Buddhism and make that your meaning in life. If youโve learned that all your experiences have taught you the importance of sticking to your truth, you might become an advocate for something.
Make sense? Itโs a simple but powerful soul searching technique.
5. Visualize yourself on your death bed
โTell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?โ the poet Mary Oliver once wrote.
This activity may at first appear morbid, but it holds within it the seed of true insight. When death is upon us, everything becomes clear, crystalline, precious. Thereโs no time to waste and the choices weโve made in life dance before our eyes.
For this activity, youโll need to set aside five or ten minutes. Get into a quiet and dark room. You may even like to wear a sleeping mask or blindfold so your vision becomes pitch black. If you want to put yourself into an even deeper mindset, you can play some funereal or ethereal music quietly in the background. (And just in case you feel too uncomfortable, ensure someone is in the house with you.)
Now, once youโre ready, imagine youโre lying on your death bed. You are reflecting on all that youโve done in your life. When you think of your biggest achievements, what comes to mind? What are you the happiest to have done, practiced, or committed to? Donโt be modest here. Think about something simply amazing you have done. What is that?
If nothing comes to mind, you can always return to this activity later (perhaps in the early morning or late at night). Once youโre ready to stop the visualization, feel into your body, stretch your legs and arms, and take off the blindfold. Consider journaling about your experience โ it will be extremely valuable to remember and reflect upon this visualization.
Learn more about how to journal.
6. Practice inner work
Why is it that we struggle to find the meaning of our lives? One reason is that we are emotionally or psychologically blocked.
We might suffer from self-doubt, low self-worth, or general self-destructive tendencies. We might be trapped within the pits of an existential crisis, a toxic relationship, an addiction, or mental health issue.
We may have even experienced a spiritual awakening so strong that our life seems to be melting around us โ and we donโt know how to put back the pieces of ourselves.
One way to create inner harmony, balance, and wholeness is through a practice known as inner work. Inner work is the mental, emotional and spiritual practice of exploring your inner self. It is about gaining self-knowledge, learning how to love yourself, working through your core beliefs, and maturing (or individuating) as a human being.
For anyone soul searching, inner work is a vital practice. It can be all too easy to skim across the surface of life without going deeper. But whatever is buried within you will eventually rise to the surface, sooner or later. Inner work is about exploring and working with the different facets of our inner selves.
The three major types of inner work that I recommend are self-love, inner child work, and shadow work.
7. Think about what type of meaning you need right now
Austrian psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl once wrote about meaning:
For the meaning of life differs from man to man, from day to day and from hour to hour. What matters, therefore, is not the meaning of life in general but rather the specific meaning of a person’s life at a given moment.
There is a quote by the German philosopher Nietzsche saying that “if a man finds a WHY he can bear with almost any HOW” – and it’s true. It was humankind that built the Auschwitz gas ovens, it was also humankind who marched into them with their heads held high and a prayer song on their lips.
As Frankl pointed out, meaning is not some solid rigid thing, but it is fluid and changeable. We need to focus on finding our meaning of life right now.
In my perspective, there are three types of meaning in life:
The first is meaning in accomplishment or achievements, where we feel fulfillment in completing tasks, goals, and dreams.
The second is the meaning we find in values such as the loyalty we feel toward a noble cause or the compassion a mother feels toward her child.
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Finally, the third is meaning in suffering, where we embrace a specific attitude to empower us within certain circumstances, e.g., “This pain I feel from the loss of my job will teach me what I truly want from life.”
Above I have just defined three types of meaning:
- Meaning in accomplishments and achievements
- Meaning in values (e.g., love, friendship, community, loyalty, courage)
- Meaning in suffering (an attitude/belief about why weโre experiencing something)
Think about where youโre currently at in life. What type of meaning do you need the most? Reflect on the most painful feelings you experience on a regular basis โ this will be the way to find what type of meaning you need.
For instance, if you suffer from feelings of boredom, fatigue or listlessness you may need to find the first type of meaning (achievement/accomplishments).
If you suffer from feelings of general unhappiness, loneliness or a specific yearning for something, you may need the second type of meaning (values).
And if you are going through an intensely painful period in life that is characterized by anxiety, depression, grief, hopelessness, and other strong forms of emotions, you may need the third type of meaning (attitude/belief about suffering).
Or hell, maybe you need all three types of meaning โ thatโs okay too! Be true to yourself and listen to your needs.
In Conclusion
Iโll leave you with a quote from the Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo,
It takes six million grains of pollen to seed one peony, and salmon need a lifetime of swimming to find their way home, so we mustn’t be alarmed or discouraged when it takes us years to find love or years to understand our calling in life.
There is no race here. You will find your meaning in your own time. And remember, your meaning can stay the same or it can change as you mature. There is no black and white manual of rules here.
Very few people just wake up one day and shout โWOOHOO! I finally know my indisputable life purpose!โ Itโs more like a messy awkward food party, where you eat one thing and throw it away until you find something that finally tastes really nice.
You may have come to this article wanting a definitive answer to the notorious โwhat is the meaning of life?โ question. But the thing is, your meaning is of your own creation.
Your meaning springs from the depths of your heart and soul. To hear it, you need to find ways of going inwards and of listening carefully. I sincerely hope the above activities will help you to do that.
Tell me, after reading this article, what are your feelings or thoughts? Do you need any clarification? Perhaps you wish to share your own experience? Please share below!
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Hello!
Thankyou for this article. I found it intensely thoughtprovoking. I feel that I agree with Bonnie Glass-Coffin that the purpose of life is to grow (or improve) our soul. Nothing else makes sense, really. I also liked your suggestion that we look to our childhood to find things that attracted us and we were naturally drawn to, to find our meaning in life. For me, after long thought, that is to create harmony between each other, and between ourselves and nature. I was always a peace-maker, and for a while that meant I was submissive and pliable and easily led. But having gone through what you call the dark night of the soul, I now realise that while that part of me might have been taken advantage of in the past, that does not mean it is a part I should eschew or ignore. It is who I am. I find this very freeing. Now to see where my thoughts and realisations take ;me…. :)
I love your work. I’ve gone through several of your articles today (with breaks) and found them very uniquely helpful and clarifying. Thank you very much
Thank you Theo, I’m happy to hear that :)
Everything you are going through is preparing you for everything you prayed for.
Hi Mateo,
I have been using these words interchangeably and this does help clarify the difference between the 2. My journey of self love and start taking responsibility has led me to a good place. I have been focusing of finding lifes purpose from a few months. Is it fair to give myself a time limit like 3 years to find it?
Do you mind if I quote a few of your articles as long as I provide credit and sources back to your blog? My blog site is in the very same area of interest as yours and my users would certainly benefit from some of the information you provide here. Please let me know if this alright with you. Thanks a lot!
Thank you for inquiring about this Kellye. We’ll be happy for you to share some of the content with a link back the original. If you plan to share the whole thing, we have instructions for that also here https://lonerwolf.com/want-republish-work/
How can I provide for my life if I am used to living at the expense of my parents? I donโt even make money. Learning or working somewhere seems too complicated for me.
Financial independence is a small part of being independent. It is not everything. If it wud have been then rich n successful people wouldn’t have taken drugs or committed suicide. If you have a system and it works for you and your people it is fine. Spend time on what you love doing since you dont have financial burden rather than thinking of yourself as someone who should be financially free.
Namen ลพivljenja duลกe je spoznati sebe kot boลพansko duลกo, kot boลพanstvo ,kot del vse viลกnjega BOGA . Spoznati da je duลกa svetloba , ljubezen , resnica
Thank you for this great read. The irony is that just last night, I was having a conversation with a friend, telling her how my need to leave where I currently reside is I need air to breathe and figure out my purpose in life for it’s something I’ve been struggling with since my teenage years. I am soon approaching my mid thirties, and now even more, I am questioning my purpose and it has me feeling lost. Entering my twenties, I had decided that it’s ok to not have things figured out and that with time all will be revealed, so I should take each day as it comes.. obstacles and all. However, the light will shine. I guess I thought by now, with some societal pressures as well, I’m in panic. As much as I know/knew that for some, it can take years and years for the light shine, this article was in a way reassuring that nothing is wrong with me. And that my time is coming. I’m glad I came across this. It was/is very enlightening. And all the other articles.
I can so much relate to your thought process. One day at a time is indeed a good way to go about it. Now from a day it has become situations or moments. Things have started to change recently. Taking Responsibility has opened a new world and I am able to connect with my feelings more after a decade of phsycological clutter going unchecked. As long as we are opening new doors all is well.
Hi Mateo. Such a beautiful article that clearly defines the difference between meaning and purpose. For the longest time, I considered the two to be the same and I am grateful to you for explaining the difference. I was thinking, the purpose of one’s life is to find what’s lost- their authentic self? If that’s true, the ultimate purpose for all of us is the same. After all, at an energy level, we all are the same. Also, it is mentioned in the article that “if you suffer from feelings of boredom, fatigue or listlessness you may need to find the first type of meaning (achievement/accomplishments”. Wouldn’t that also mean that the person may have low self-worth and is looking for external factors (like an achievement or accomplishment) to feel good? As I type this, I feel like I am overthinking :D Another thought that just came to my head is that not everything can be a result of low self-worth and sometimes people do require validation (like again an achievement) to remind themselves of their capabilities. Would love to hear your thoughts on this.
P.s. I love the work you’re doing. I’m sure it’s helping a lot of people on their journey. Thank you.
Thank you Maariyah for your lovely thoughtful comment. The way I’d answer your two questions is with another simple distinction, and that is the one of ego vs pride. Ego is dependent on others, it’s a sense of self-worth born out of others opinion of us. Developmental research has shown we’re incapable of self-reflection until early adolescence, so we use others reflections about us, and internalize them as beliefs about ourselves, this is the birth of our ego structure.
Pride, on the other hand, I see as the self-actualizing process of an individual. It’s an expression from our deeper self, a manifestation of our existence to the universe. I climb a mountain on my own, not so I can tell others that I did (although some do), but so that I can feel the accomplishment of challenging myself and exactly how far I can go, how intensely do I exist.
I hope this helps answer your question. :)
Greetings,
Your Work here is really awsome!
This free article values lives of men!
thank you.
It’s my joy writing it :)