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    » Home » Rebirth

    The 9 Stages of Spiritual Self-Realization

    Reading time: 9 mins

    by Aletheia · Jun 12, 2022 · 77 Comments

    Image of a tree and sun symbolic of self-realization

    Self-realization is one of those phrases that we hear on the spiritual path that goes in one ear and out the other. We don’t give it much thought, yet it’s at the very heart of EVERYTHING.

    Without seeing Self-Realization as the ultimate goal of the spiritual journey, our paths are vague, blurry, and disjointed. 

    We don’t really know why we’re doing what we’re doing. And if we do have some fabricated reason, we never feel truly satisfied: everything we obtain, all the spiritual brownie points we collect, feel empty and ultimately disappointing.

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    In fact, when we lose sight of the importance of Self-Realization, our spiritual paths are nothing but one distraction after another.

    We become spiritual consumers, dabbling here and there in attractive spiritual “products,” without ever really diving deep.

    I call this Rabbit Hole Spirituality: like Alice in Wonderland, we’re constantly falling into endless rabbit holes of new trends, exciting practices, and sparkly feel-good philosophies.

    But the reality is that we’re lost in the superficial, and eventually, something new will come along and catch our eye, and off into another Rabbit Hole we’ll fall.

    Thankfully, there are paths out there that are aligned with a deeper form of spirituality – and all of them lead to Self-Realization.

    If you’re not quite sure what the hell Self-Realization is, or how to experience it, stick around.

    What is Self-Realization?

    Image of a solar eclipse symbolic of self-realization

    There are two definitions of Self-Realization: one is secular, the other is spiritual.

    According to various Western psychological and philosophical traditions, self-realization is the fulfillment of our personal potential in life. Essentially, it’s being all that we can be in an unlimited, expansive sense. However, according to Eastern spirituality, Self-Realization is the knowledge and embodiment of our True Nature or the Higher Self beyond the ego. 

    Here we have two strangely conflicting definitions from the East and West.

    Which definition is correct?

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    Actually neither definition is right or wrong: both are equally relevant as they uphold each other. I’ll explain why next. 

    The 3 Shamanic Realms of Self-Realization

    Self-Realization is not so much one big lights-and-glamor moment as it is a slow and steady process. This process occurs within the three realms of existence:

    1. The Middle World
    2. The Lower World
    3. The Upper World

    Using shamanic terminology, the middle world is the realm where we live everyday life. This is the realm where we go about our daily existence with family, friends, and work colleagues. 

    The lower world is the downwards and inwards realm where everything hiding beneath the surface dwells. This is the realm of thoughts, feelings, instincts, dreams, unconscious wounds, and at a core level, the soul.

    The upper world is the upwards and outwards realm where we transcend the body, mind, and soul and enter the immaterial, eternal Spirit that permeates all layers of existence.

    Each realm has a purpose …

    Within each realm there is a task for us to fulfill:

    • In the middle world, the task is ego growth
    • In the lower world, the task is soul embodiment
    • In the upper world, the task is spirit realization (also known as Self-Realization)

    As depth psychologist Bill Plotkin writes,

    Ego growth, soul embodiment, and spirit realization are equally vital to growing whole. Although all three components can be engaged concurrently, there is a natural sequence to their unfolding: ego growth is the foundation upon which soul embodiment rests, and the latter, I believe, most effectively galvanizes spirit realization.

    Here we see that all three realms build on top of, and support, one another – the ultimate goal being Self-Realization.

    The difference between self-realization and Self-Realization …

    So here we see there are actually two types of Self-Realization.

    The West promotes the realization of the self’s (ego’s) fullest potential. This process occurs within the middle and under world realm. And some Western schools of psychology, such as those that adhere to Carl Jung’s philosophies, promote soul realization (also known as the individuation process).

    And the East promotes the realization of the Self – that is, liberation from the small fabricated self (ego), and the embodiment of one’s Higher Self or True Nature. This is an upper world path, a path that transcends the personal ego and soul, and unites us with the Absolute, Unchanging, and Eternal Spirit. This is the path of enlightenment. 

    Most Western and Eastern schools of thought ignore or deny the importance of all three paths working together in unison. But they are all essential paths to embrace so that we can experience true Self-Realization – just as a tree needs roots, a trunk, and branches to be whole.

    The 9 Stages of Spiritual Self-Realization

    Image of a man in meditation and the moon

    And should you choose to devote yourself to the ongoing journey of self-realization, you will develop a tremendous sense of respect for who you really are. It is only then that you will come to appreciate the full depth of meaning in the advice: “This above all: to thine own self be true.”

    – Michael A. Singer

    As I mentioned previously, Self-Realization is not so much one great big moment as it is a gradual process of unfolding. 

    (However, it must be noted here that for some rare individuals, Self-Realization does come as one big moment. But for the vast majority of us, it’s a slow and steady process.)

    Below you’ll find the nine stages of spiritual Self-Realization: from the beginning of the journey, all the way to the end. Please note that Self-Realization is not necessarily (and often isn’t) a linear process. We often experience a spiral of unfolding and transformation, and it’s common to move forward and backward:

    1. Self-Awareness

    At the beginning of the journey is the dawning of self-awareness. This may occur sporadically as a result of temporary moments of introspection or as an entire spiritual awakening. Self-awareness is when we become aware of ourselves (from an ego-based standpoint) and how we interact with the world.

    Those who are self-aware move away from their previous psychological ignorance (also commonly referred to as “being asleep”) and into greater self-consciousness. This can be a painful period as we take an honest look at our thoughts, habits, choices, and ways of relating to the world. Often we don’t like what we see. Thus, we either numb ourselves out of denial or enter the path of self-growth (also known as the spiritual path). 

    2. Self-Exploration

    After the shock of awakening to more self-awareness, we’re driven by the desire to explore ourselves more – this is the journey of self-exploration.

    Self-exploration is fuelled by a mixture of curiosity (“who am I really?”) and dissatisfaction (“I can’t believe I did/said/believed that!”). We want to find out more about personalities and understand our authentic place in life.

    Self-exploration often occurs in the middle world (the realm of everyday life) and the purpose of it is to uncover how we think, feel, and behave. To get answers, we seek to gain knowledge and understanding of ourselves through books, workshops, films, personality tests, and other psychological and spiritual practices.

    3. Self-Discovery

    Once we start dabbling in the world of self-exploration, we eventually experience self-discovery, which is what happens when we dig deep underneath the surface of ourselves.

    Self-discovery occurs when we move from the “what?” to the “WHY?” While the previous stage (self-exploration) deals with what we like/feel/do/think, self-discovery deals with why we like/feel/do/think everything that emerges inside of us.

    In this stage, it’s common to begin various forms of inner work that get to the root of our core selves.

    4. Self-Understanding

    Self-understanding is a crystallization of the previous three stages: it’s a deep understanding of the dynamics and workings of our ego selves.

    People who have reached this stage have a thorough and multi-layered understanding of the origins and reasons why they think, feel, and behave the way they do. Not only have they explored their conscious ego, but they’ve also explored their unconscious mind to meet their shadow selves and other buried core wounds.

    Self-Understanding is a lower world path that goes downwards and inwards, touching and revealing the very nature of our souls.

    5. Self-Love

    Next is self-love: the stage where we are filled with compassion for ourselves and all that we’ve been through.

    As a lower world path, self-love is what happens when we tap into the fundamental nature of our heart and soul: love. When we love ourselves, we are fuelled by a deep understanding of ourselves. In fact, without the previous stage (self-understanding) it’s almost impossible to practice self-love because we don’t know what or why we do, think, and feel what we do. 

    Learning how to love ourselves means that we stop punishing ourselves, start nurturing ourselves, and start experiencing greater self-esteem, self-confidence, and self-forgiveness.

    6. Self-Transformation

    In this stage, we begin to shed our old and limiting habits, perceptions, and compulsions that were created by the false self (ego) and transform into the most authentic version of ourselves possible.

    When we experience self-transformation, we enter a death and rebirth process that can feel uncomfortable and destabilizing at first. But ultimately, any change we undergo is liberating. In other words, we become more soul-centered instead of ego-centered, and we’re more comfortable in our skin.

    Thanks to the previous five stages, we’re able to make space for new growth to occur. Like a butterfly emerging from its cocoon, we feel more expanded, free, and grounded.

    7. Self-Mastery

    As a culmination of stages 1-6, this stage is about reaping the rewards of a stable and well-adjusted ego. Psychologist Carl Jung referred to this stage as individuation, that is, becoming a whole human being who is connected and aligned with the soul. 

    Self-mastery is just that, mastering the false self (or ego) – but not with tyranny or a domineering stance. Instead, mastering the false self is done with love and understanding. 

    Instead of being slaves to our egos, we live from the heart and soul, and our egos are yielding and in service to our souls. 

    When we experience self-mastery, our inner and outer worlds are balanced, and we become the Kings or Queens of our own middle worlds (everyday life) and lower worlds (inner life). We are self-contained, calm, perceptive, wise, compassionate, and lighthearted.

    8. Self-Transcendence

    Next is self-transcendence which is where we start entering the world of Spirit (or the upper world). 

    When we walk the path of self-transcendence, we are seeking to move beyond our limited egos and attachment to our souls, and become One with the Divine. 

    The desire to self-transcend may come naturally throughout time (as a result of diligently walking the spiritual path), through sudden mystical experiences, profound transpersonal insights, or a deep inner calling to taste ultimate freedom.

    Common self-transcendence paths and practices out there include meditation, yogic disciplines, mystical and higher consciousness traditions (Sufism, Gnosticism, Taoism, Buddhism, etc.), self-inquiry, non-dual teachings, contemplation, and so forth. 

    9. Self-Realization

    At last, we come to Self-Realization. What can be said other than the fact that Self-Realization can be sought and worked for, but ultimately, it is a gift from Life itself. 

    Self-Realization occurs when we stop identifying with the limited ego and attaching to the soul, and instead recognize ourselves as one and the same as the Divine. Moving past a sense of “me,” “mine,” and “I am ___,” (aka. the inner stories fabricated by our illusory selves) we come to embody what is referred to as Christ Consciousness, Enlightenment, Buddhahood, Non-Dual Awareness, and Oneness. 

    Other names for this sacred experience are nirvana, heaven, moksha, unio mystica (spiritual alchemy), samadhi, cosmic consciousness, and so on. 

    When we experience Self-Realization, we have seen through the insubstantiality and impermanence of the ego (this can be experienced through meditation), the dreamlike nature of thought, and the illusion of attachment to all phenomena, and into the vast, spacious, and eternal presence that exists everywhere. 

    In this stage, we are free from suffering, free from fear, and free from all separation. What remains is a pure radiance of being, a total union with Life, an experience of endless love, connection, understanding, and openness to existence. 

    How to Experience a Taste of Self-Realization

    Image of a woman experiencing enlightened self-realization

    Self-realization is a journey that could take you a few years, decades, or most commonly, an entire lifetime (or longer). But it is a sacred and worthy path that is worth every bit of your time, effort, sincerity, and dedication. Ultimately, it is the path of enlightenment, the path of freedom, and the path of love. What could be better than that?

    Now that we’ve explored what self-realization is, and the nine stages, how can we taste – even just briefly – this experience? (I’m sure you’re curious!)


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    Here are some methods and practices that will likely help you dip into this life-changing experience (although nothing is ever guaranteed):

    • Long stretches of meditation (45 minutes or more per day) – keep in mind that it’s important to work up to this goal, especially if you’re a beginner
    • Plant medicine journeying (with ayahuasca, peyote, mescaline, psilocybin mushrooms, marijuana, etc.) – if you have a mental illness, I recommend talking to a professional therapist beforehand, otherwise, this is an amazing path that must be approached with clear conscious intention and respect
    • Entering altered states of consciousness (such as through a trance state, lucid dreaming, breathwork, self-hypnosis) – remember to be gentle with yourself and go slowly
    • Nature immersion – try spending long periods of time in nature (1+ hours), particularly in wild and untamed areas that aren’t visited by people

    If you can you recommend any other practices, share below and help inspire others!

    ***

    I hope you now have a deeper understanding of Self-Realization. Remember that we often move forward and backward on the path: it’s not linear. Instead, it’s a process that ebbs and flows, waxes and wanes, and moves in a spiral pattern. 

    Tell me, what stage are you at on the journey toward self-realization? I’d love to hear about your experiences.

    The 9 Stages of Spiritual Self-Realization
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    About Aletheia

    Aletheia is a prolific psychospiritual writer, author, and spiritual mentor whose work has touched the lives of millions worldwide. As a survivor of fundamentalist religious abuse, her mission is to help others find love, strength, and inner light in even the darkest places. She is the author of hundreds of popular articles, as well as numerous books and journals on the topics of Self-Love, Spiritual Awakening, and more. [Read More]

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    Reader Interactions

    (77) Comments

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    1. Dipali Gandhi

      June 25, 2022 at 9:39 pm

      Hi Aletheia,

      Sorry now I can comment! :)
      Thanks for this informative post on Eastern and Western understandings regarding Self Realization. This is enlightening! As per the stages you have listed, I would just like to share that I am on the 9th stage. Interestingly, I did not do any meditation, yoga, or chanting. I just attended a scientific ceremony of Self Realization wherein the body complex and Soul (Self) are separated scientifically by knowing each through their properties. At the end of some 2-3 hours, a conviction is established that I am not this body but “I am pure Soul”. At the same time, I get the knowledge of who is the doer of this world. So, this is totally Gnan marg (path of knowledge). As this is very different from the paths known to Self Realization, I am sharing it. You can simple search on Google for Dadabhagwan and head towards the official site to know more.

      Reply
    2. Dipali Gandhi

      June 25, 2022 at 9:31 pm

      Somehow I am unable to comment

      Reply
    3. Markus

      April 07, 2022 at 1:42 am

      I have been self realized (stage 9) for 2 years.
      I found that there is a lot of momentum behind certain thoughts and behaviours that dissipate over time, I guess you could call this an integration period.
      My experience was kind of like a snowball, gaining momentum and then the awakening was very sudden, just while I was walking around town.
      In this sense, it really is a gift, because I wasnt doing or practicing anything to acheive it.
      With nothing to become or attain, I’m still a bit at a loss of what to do in life, but I’m also accepting of this and have heard its not unusual for people to spend a few years not doing a whole lot after self realisation.

      Reply
    4. Eugene

      March 22, 2022 at 11:50 pm

      people call me Eugene, from Ireland, been living in your stage 9 for 18 months

      Reply
      • Aletheia Luna

        March 25, 2022 at 12:23 pm

        Hi Eugene from Ireland ;)

        Reply
    5. John

      February 21, 2022 at 10:35 am

      Hi my name isJohn Rifenburgh I live in the states and I am stifled in finding myself due to an overwhelming addiction if I were well off it wouldn’t be an issue but due to being poor what I’m left with is doctors that want to throw drug replacement therapies at me and I am dying to be in a ayahuasca ceremony but South America is way out of my price range I am also looking for a type of holistic therapist that takes my insurance and has the same views you promote
      I am in desperate need so any advice or anything is much appreciated
      John

      Reply
      • Aletheia Luna

        March 25, 2022 at 12:26 pm

        Hi John,
        I hear you brother. Have you researched online to see what legal psychedelics are available in your own country? There are many plant medicines available and you could always join a Facebook group about that and ask if someone would be willing to be your sitter (or if you have a close friend, they could watch you as well). I’ve also heard that it’s possible to grow your own ayahuasca vines, but again you’d have to check the legality of that in your country. I hope you find what you’re searching for ♡

        Reply
        • Carla malone

          May 29, 2022 at 3:12 pm

          John, I have literally just broke down on my bed after months of being stuck with this addiction. I’ve had no sleep, last night I was literally on my knees crying, frustrated screaming at myself why am I doing this, it’s not giving me the high anymore I’m just killing myself now and I’ve broken my own heart.
          I have just had a 20 min breakdown after finally seeing!!! I’ve got my drug downstairs but I don’t want it! I’m done!
          8 years of awakening and so much growth I can’t believe im still alive!
          Fortunately for me John, this drug doesn’t cause much withdrawal just a week or 2 of depression and im already ready to take it on. I’ve been through worse.
          I think once u break through you won’t care!! You’ve done it and you’re a f…….n hero!!
          You will be fine im sure, just listen to your body.

          Reply
    « Older Comments

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