The spiritual ego is the most dangerous type of ego of all.
If you aren’t mindful, it can wreak total destruction in your life – but not in a violent or aggressive way. Instead, the spiritual ego is disguised under the mask of “good intentions,” “higher vibration,” “awakened perspective” and humble pomposity.
Beware of the spiritual ego.
It’s a trap that many of us spiritual seekers can and will, at some point, fall into. And the longer we remain in that spiritual ditch, that stagnant standstill, the more likely we are to develop into a spiritual narcissist.
Indeed, spiritual narcissism is perhaps the most tragic malady to befall humanity of all. We’ll explore why a little later. But first:
Table of contents
What is the Spiritual Ego?
Firstly, let’s touch on the basics. The ego is our sense of self; it is the illusory “I” story we carry around in the world as an evolutionary survival mechanism. Yet the ego is the source of all our suffering and our feeling of being separated from that which we truly are which is boundless, whole, and infinite. We might call this Spirit, God/dess, Life, Oneness, Consciousness, and so on.
So what is the spiritual ego? The spiritual ego builds on top of this fundamental ego that we carry around. It is the ego on crack, the ego on steroids, the ego inflated beyond its usual garden-variety size. Yet the thing is, we don’t realize we’ve developed a spiritual ego until life well and truly starts getting messy.
How Does the Spiritual Ego Develop?
The spiritual ego is a product of spiritual materialism – that is, using spirituality to serve the ego, instead of approaching the spiritual path with the intent on trying to move beyond the ego.
When spiritual paths, practices, and concepts become a slave of the ego, this is the birth of the spiritual ego. In other words, when a person’s central idea about themselves is ruled by the belief that they’re a “spiritual person” this is the spiritual ego.
When being a “spiritual person” eclipses all else that a person is, this is the spiritual ego in action. Yes, there are positive benefits to building your identity around spirituality. But there are also some pretty scary consequences that we shouldn’t ignore.
The Development of Spiritual Narcissism
Walking the spiritual path properly is a very subtle process; it is not something to jump into naively. There are numerous sidetracks which lead to a distorted, ego-centered version of spirituality; we can deceive ourselves into thinking we are developing spiritually when instead we are strengthening our egocentricity through spiritual techniques. This fundamental distortion may be referred to as spiritual materialism.
– Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche
Spiritual narcissism is the very culmination of spiritual egotism: it is the ego that has become so solid, so fixed, so unyielding in the idea of its own spiritual greatness that it is pathological. It is narcissistic.
As we know already, narcissism is a mental disorder where a person has an inflated sense of their own importance (amongst several other hairy issues). The exact same problem applies to spiritual narcissists: they have such unwavering belief in their own awakened perspective, their own “special” spiritual achievements and knowledge, that they cannot connect with (or tolerate) their humanity. Spiritual narcissists cannot tolerate other people either – even though they may fine-tune the external image of being compassionate or wise – others ultimately pose a threat to their delusional grandiosity.
Spiritual narcissism begins with spiritual materialism. Within spiritual materialism (the trap of using spirituality to serve the ego) there is always a seed of spiritual narcissism. And if that seed keeps being fed without going unchecked, without being uprooted or challenged, it grows and grows.
Eventually, we can become so sidetracked, so deluded by the ego that has used spirituality to make itself indestructible, that we are worse off on the spiritual path than when we began.
Examples of the Spiritual Ego
Some of these examples border on spiritual narcissism (or are flat out narcissistic), others can more typically be seen in the spiritual community. Let’s look at some examples of the spiritual ego:
- Claiming to have “special access” to a spirit guide/angel/spirit/ascended master for the purposes of self-aggrandizement
- Believing oneself to be the reincarnation of a superior being, famous spiritual historical figure, etc. (what does it really matter if one is?)
- Taking frequent pictures of one’s spiritual practice and posting them online in order to boost one’s self-image, status, and gain attention/validation
- Declaring that others can’t possibly understand you because you have attained a certain state of ‘high vibrational awareness,’ awakening, liberation, etc. – and showing contempt for those who aren’t at the same ‘level’ (instead of compassion)
- Using Dharma-talk to avoid being psychologically vulnerable, showing empathy, and facing human emotions (e.g., “Just let go and let be,” “You attracted that experience,” “Who is there to experience this?”)
- Looking down on “low vibe,” “unevolved,” “unawakened,” “asleep” people
- Boasting about and flaunting spiritual achievements or gifts
- Imitating what a “spiritual person” looks and sounds like
You get the picture.
I’m sure you can think of a few more examples, and you’re welcome to share them in the comments.
15 Signs of the Spiritual Ego
The spiritual ego is so dangerous because it is nearly impenetrable.
People can spend their entire lives (or lifetimes) stuck in the trap of unknowingly misusing spiritual words, ideas, practices, and paths to inflate their egos.
Sadly, the spiritual ego can result in instances of abuse and even murder such as Jonestown, the abuse committed by Bikram Choudhury (founder of Bikram yoga), Swami Rama (Indian yogi), Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh (spiritual teacher), Sogyal Rinpoche, Andrew Cohen, and even Chogyam Trungpa (who coined spiritual materialism), and so on. The cases of spiritual ego are so wide and varied they are impossible to include here.
The reality is that as spiritual beings having a human experience we are imperfect. Hell, I’ve fallen into the spiritual ego numerous times – and it’s not pretty. But the crucial thing is to practice humility, openness, and the willingness to be honest with ourselves – these qualities are the best defense against spiritual egotism and narcissism.
So, without further ado, here are signs of the spiritual ego and spiritual narcissism that you need to look out for (both within yourself and others):
- Overly publicizing (read: boasting) your special spiritual accomplishments
- Claiming a stance of superiority (directly or indirectly) due to one’s spiritual gifts or talents
- Attempting to transcend the physical/earthly and take on godlike qualities
- Believing that your connection with the Divine is somehow deeper or more special than other people’s connection
- Focusing on how “more spiritually evolved” you are than others and …
- Judging others for being “less awakened,” “asleep,” “unconscious”
- Attempting to look like, dress like, sound like a “spiritual” person
- Using spiritual words and concepts to avoid being wrong, mistaken or facing vulnerable emotions
- Flaunting how spiritual you are on social media (with photos that demonstrate spiritual postures, setups, locations, tools, etc.)
- Becoming overly identified with spiritual knowledge (and how much “you” know)
- Trying to convert people to your perception (preaching to them or debating)
- Resistance to being “called out” and resenting those who try to do this
- Claiming access to special and exclusive spiritual knowledge that others can’t access
- Lack of curiosity and receptivity to life
- Wearing a mask of niceness, positivity or wisdom
Essentially, those wound up in the woes of spiritual egotism frequently try to reaffirm their spiritual specialness to the world through covert and overt methods. However, more often than not, the spiritual ego is a slippery little devil that is hard to call out or define clearly, simply because we’re so close to it and find ways to justify it.
Why is the Spiritual Ego Dangerous?
Quite simply, the spiritual ego is so dangerous because it is dressed in robes of light. It appears to be awakened, illuminated, wise, and all-loving – and that’s what makes it so difficult to catch.
Furthermore, the spiritual ego makes us feel powerful, even untouchable which is precisely what the ego seeks to achieve. To challenge it challenges the very foundations of our own self-worth and self-image – and that can be positively terrifying. In fact, we can even feel like we’re committing a profane and sacrilegious act calling the spiritual ego out because it’s so inflated and has such a good opinion of itself (a delusion which we have totally bought into).
Not only that, but the spiritual ego is also dangerous because it limits all growth: it is the death of any transformation because to evolve means to go through the cycles of death and rebirth. And if the spiritual ego has “already arrived” there is stasis, there simply cannot be any more growth.
In fact, the deadliest virus on our paths is to believe that “we’ve arrived,” have become “enlightened,” or somehow spiritually superior to others. The ego has not only become narcissistic, but it has developed a full-blown God Complex; the state of believing that it is in actual fact God. But this is not in an egoless, non-dual way: this is pure ego-centrism, the very definition of darkness (or the absence of light).
The more ego-based we are, the further we are from the Light of Consciousness which goes beyond the self. And if residing in the ego equals a disconnection from the Divine, living from a place of ego-centric God Complex goes one step further: it is like living in total darkness – the very definition of hell.
When a person is living in hell, they will harm others. This is basic knowledge that even a child could understand. When there is a total absence of light, there is only darkness – and how can a person see clearly, feel clearly, think clearly, or behave clearly in such a state? The result is suffering, both for the one experiencing the God Complex and those unfortunate souls around him/her.
How to Stop the Spiritual Ego
As I mentioned previously, we need to approach the spiritual path with humility, openness, and the willingness to be honest with ourselves.
A crucial place to start is by practicing a combination of self-love and shadow work – two inner work practices.
We all have a shadow side (i.e., the face of the ego that isn’t presented to the public), and we need to become aware of it in order to prevent issues such as spiritual egotism and narcissism from arising.
If you would like to learn more about shadow work, see our free shadow work guide.
You can start by asking yourself questions such as:
- “If I saw someone else behave the way I do, what would I think of them?”
- “Am I willing to face my inner contradictions – and if there is resistance, what doesn’t the spiritual ego want me to see?”
- “In what areas do I feel spiritually superior to others?”
- “How consistent am I in what I feel, think, and do?”
You can also ask trusted friends, loved ones, or spiritual mentors to help point out areas where you might be falling into spiritual delusion. Introspective journaling (see our shadow work journal), is also another way of calling out the spiritual ego.
What are your thoughts about spiritual narcissism and the spiritual ego? I’d love to hear your experiences in the comments below. Also, feel free to suggest any methods that can help people guard against this spiritual trap.
After noticing a pattern of red flags during several, live zoom calls a while back—from someone who teaches about science merging with spirituality—I shared a comment that it’s ironic to continually see, hear and feel his strong judgments about the negative aspects of the ego, since the individual and Collective Ego is known to be very judgmental.
He also teaches that the ego is all about self-importance. So I asked him why even publicly celebrate his own birthday party (titled as such)—as his members’ annual gathering—if the self is not so important? Since then, he changed the title of his upcoming, members’ gathering.
I’ve often noticed within the broad range of the Spirituality community, that some spiritual teachers often talk down about the ego and negative shadow aspects, as if they have no ego and the latter doesn’t apply to them.
Regarding a few of your bullets below, from the above list about the spiritual ego:
“Claiming to have ‘special access’ to a spirit guide/angel/spirit/ascended master for the purposes of self-aggrandizement” [there are those who have vivid dreams of angels, animal spirit guides, Light Beings, etc., who also experience daily, positive synchronicity, to include number synchronicity, and share with others with loving intentions; so perhaps it’s beneficial to share various perspectives so that such experiences aren’t thrown into the same box, which isn’t the WHOLE truth]
The 4 quotes below apply to your situation as a Twin Flame couple:
“Believing oneself to be the reincarnation of a superior being, famous spiritual historical figure, etc. (what does it really matter if one is?)”
“Claiming a stance of superiority (directly or indirectly) due to one’s spiritual gifts or talents”
“Believing that your connection with the Divine is somehow deeper or more special than other people’s connection”
“In fact, the deadliest virus on our paths is to believe that ‘we’ve arrived,’ have become “enlightened,” or somehow spiritually superior to others. The ego has not only become narcissistic, but it has developed a full-blown God Complex; the state of believing that it is in actual fact God. But this is not in an egoless, non-dual way: this is pure ego-centrism, the very definition of darkness (or the absence of light).” [Darkness (Unknown) & Light (Known)]
I haven’t visited your website in a while, but if I recall correctly, the two of you have been advertising yourselves as a TWIN FLAME couple (which is a very HUGE spiritual label); so that’s okay, but so-called others thinking highly of themselves (in a non-arrogant way) is NOT?
And regarding you both being a Twin Flame couple, here’s your question from the above quote: “(what does it really matter if one is?)”
I continue to trust that Great Leaders create more Great Leaders; so if the two of you can become Twin Flames—Gods & Goddesses, each WHOLE within inner and outer worlds—there is hope for the rest of humanity as well, within this lifetime or others.
Your own shadow work questions that may help you:
“Am I willing to face my inner contradictions – and if there is resistance, what doesn’t the spiritual ego want me to see?”
“In what areas do I feel spiritually superior to others?”
I trust that both of you have shared an abundance of encouraging, uplifting, empowering, inspiring, and consciousness expanding information, knowledge and wisdom, and will continue to do so. Thank you for your service.
As a humble suggestion, maybe next you must write an article of why narcissists tend to project their narcissism onto others?
Thanks for the suggestion Maverick, it’s a good topic. My main understanding would revolve around narcissists not having a solid sense of self within, so they project a lot of themselves onto the world and see those qualities in others.
This is great insight and truth. I have fallen into this many times as well. It is like a shiny thing to a crow. It distracts. Thank you so much for your transparency and sharing your knowledge. It is true about reaching a point where you cannot relate to humanity and become apathetic. I did that very thing. It didn’t seem very kind and i had to fall pretty hard. Yes I was in a state of bliss it seemed, but I couldn’t understand others pain. Even though not long before I had been in tremendous pain. It is so tricky. I just want to serve those around me the best I can, falling short daily and be a good human. Thank you again for your service.
Im really grateful for your postings. I also find them very interesting in learning more about myself, as i continue down this spiritual path. That at times can be very arduous, and not to mention very challenging. although I have come to find that the more that Im allowed to move forward the more private that Im becoming. Ive come to learn that I am a loner who maybe possesses an old soul. Ive never really connected with people of my age or younger, also I am a lover of divine knowledge. Also Ive always seem to be educating myself not waiting on others. Im not antisocial, Im just not into superficial people and conversations. Etc.,etc………………
Hi
I’ve been dating a woman who smokes bufo ( frog venom from Mexico, psycodelic)
She was telling me she saw the source, and God, that we are all connected, brotherhood, unconditional love..
She wanted me to smoke that poison. She says is the only medicine , but people are asleep and don’t understand what she is capable to understand.
The matter of fact is that during our relationship she did an said so many nasty things,she was very manipulative, self centered , withholding affection, cold and hot, gaslighting, being so ambiguos ,silent treatment, etc
Every time I tried to point at any of her attitudes she would blow up and refuse to talk about it, saying things like ” you are not talking to me with love”..
I suffer so much anxiety and other mental issues..
She came to my life saying she could help me to heal, that she saw the light and things like that.
Now ,after she dumped me I’m so lost, even more than before. I believed she was on tune and a real humble soul who tried to help but in the end I painted her 2 houses, help her with her stuff, took care of her mother… And I got just some food,eventual sex , and her driving me on her car..
Everytime I tried to tell her ” don’t you see what you doing it’s unfair” or “can you explain me why you act this way, I’m confused” she would explode saying things like ” you are to sensitive, ” you are overthinking” when not ending yelling at me or insulting me.
On the other hand she would do meditation,and yoga, eat healthy, and have a very organized and proper life all ahead, one of the reasons I took her as a example to follow..
I just don’t get it
I was depress before her, and now I’m even more depressed and obsessed as I tried for a year to understand her although nothing seemed to make sense.
Thanks for your post, it helped me to clarify which kind of person I’ve been involved with.
Kisses and hugs from Spain
Not forcing you, but I suggest you look into the signs of gaslighting or emotional manipulation in a relationship online. Medcircle, a Youtube channel by psychiatrists may help. Also looking up “narcissist blogs,” also show a lot of personal websites by others who can talk about the topic of abusers well. Thank you.
Hi Sergio, it definitely sounds like, from your post, that you got involved with someone suffering from spiritual narcissism (or the spiritual ego). May you find strength, clarity, and healing ♡
So someone I live with uses spirituality to prop up their ego and keep others down it’s frightening to see when all I give them is love and compassion, whenever I try to give a small bit of helpful advice they react with hostility
Sounds about right. Each will accept advice when they’re open to it and ready, when not, it’ll just be a jab at their ego. We’ve all been there before, everything must come at its time.
Hello from Poland!
We’ve got here in Poland a few so called “therapists” who use Bert Hellinger’s “Family Constellations” and…OMG their spiritual materialism is just breathtaking lol
Hehe sound about right, it’s a shame to see that happening in so many healing practices.
Thanks for writing about this, Mateo. I’m seeing this more than ever now, with the “spiritual” and “conscious” patting themselves on the back with self-congratulatory fervor. And where are they (we) learning these lessons from? Where it pops up the most is from teachers selling their own courses who equate real spirituality with “abundance” that is, of course, available for the right price (“and shame on you for not buying!”). These teachers have happily adopted common marketing pitches like “time is running out!” and “don’t miss this opportunity!” *sigh* Both self-help and spirituality have been infected by materialism, which is blissfully edging out humility.
Recently I watched a lecture by someone who made a name for himself in the “conscious relationship” world decades ago, and during his speech every few minutes he stopped to lauded himself for various achievements. His travels (to Bali of course). His success. His great wife. Being a best-selling author. And on and on and on. It amazes me how quickly the so-called “spiritual” world has been infected by egotism and self-aggrandizement. What happened to modesty?
Thanks again for this important work.
Thank Matthew for sharing that, I couldn’t agree more. I think the key issue has been not only the fact that the internet has extended our reach, which reflects as a culture how self-absorbed and narcissistic we are. But it’s also come in the perfect storm when religion has died, and there’s nothing greater than ourselves left, so we become the source of divinity. It’s a brave new world, I’m often conflicted by having to sell our products to support this work while at the same time not getting lost in the marketplace this industry has become, hence why we provide most of it for free here and on our youtube.
I’m exploring what future solutions make look like, it’s a massive problem we’re facing as a society.
I read this early this morning and then walked away from it. It’s been dogging me all morning! I came back and read it again as well as watched the video and went to your ego page to see if we were on the same wavelength in it’s description and role. I would advise anyone reading this article to read that one as well. This is an amazing article and I thank you for it. It brings up many questions and thoughts. This topic has been on my mind off and on for over 30 years. After reading the article I got to thinking that perhaps spiritual egoism is sometimes a good thing if it leads someone to move forwards in whatever way was destined for them. So I’m quite sure that not all outside help ie. gurus, websites, channelers, etc are expressing spirtiual egotism. But I also hold to it being the ‘seekers’ responsibilty to question everything, find their own truth, and do their own deep personal work as in Shadow work. I have a problem with spiritual people (IMO)who clearly have not done their own inner work and yet profess to have the answers and fixes. Perhaps one way of noticing someone in their ego is if they rely too heavily or exclusively on the ‘tools’. Tools are great, I love some of them! Who doesn’t? But when one cannot function without them I start to question. There are so many out there giving powerful messages supposedly channeled by super spirits/beings that I often wonder about the ego that my be involved. So my question to you is…How or when is spiritual egotism perhaps a good thing? Not narcism. Perhaps a better question might be What are the signs of a healthy and positive spiritual ego? In this world of duality there has to be the opposite. Thanks again!
Thank you Diane for sharing your insights. It’s true there’s a lot of ‘powerful messages’ out there, but I think they confuse ‘spiritualism’ with ‘spirituality’, this is one of my dislikes of the ‘new age’ stuff, it misleads more than it helps.
To answer your question, spiritual egoism is never a good thing. This is an example of how muddled our understanding can become due to the misinformation mentioned above. Having a healthy balanced ego is definitely a good thing, we are human beings after all, we must live in this world with others so this is why inner work is so crucial. But there’s no need to attach the ‘spiritual’ label to the ‘ego’, then it just becomes being egotistical about spiritual topics/labels. So healthy ego (which is different from ‘egotism’) is necessary, but authentic spirituality is actually the opposite; it’s connection to something greater and larger than ourselves/egos, spirit relating with spirit.
In this way, ‘spiritual ego’ becomes an oxymoron. We must live between two worlds, the human and the divine, but they cannot be forced into one and bypassed.
I hope that helps :).
If you want examples of the spiritual ego just read some of the comments. Mostly you find this in comments by persons unknown. Hiding behind anonymity.
I was doing shadow work Exercise 53 – Judgements
I had quite a few lately.
On the 2nd part it hit me. I’m not doing the things that I’m judging them for because I’m past that!
It hit me then! I’m being so self righteous because I’m growing more spiritually than them! I know so much more!
Oh my goodness !
I’m so glad that exercise showed me what I was doing and I found this article. Perfect timing also.
Lately, I’ve been thinking this way because of a few incidents that happened recently.
I don’t like putting labels but I’ve been labeling myself a lot!
I don’t want to lose my way.
It’s funny that I told a friend if I start acting better than to slap me back to earth lol.
He didn’t but said something about me being more spiritual than others.
I guess I was fooling him too.
I’m glad I caught myself. I’ve been working on self-love but I guess it’s becoming cocky.
Thank you so much for the video and article. ❤
That’s wonderful Yesenia, I love breakthrough moments like that which feel both amazing and yet frightening at how ‘blind’ we’ve been to some aspects of ourselves. Without the old spaces and elder guides that these spiritual paths/techniques used to have, it’s very easy to get lost in the ego’s games. The online culture doesn’t help either as it encourages comparisons, ego labels and misguiding information. I’m grateful the journal and articles are helping :)
Interesting that your bio is a bit self promotional. It makes me feel alienated.
Saying your skills and qualifications are just meant to increase trustworthiness when providing a certain service. If anything, exaggerating qualities without explaining your own experience seems more like self promotion. It is a bit like in a job interview how you have to tell someone what your skills and talents are. Ir is not to brag, but simply a pragmatic decision to show if you are qualified for a job. What do you prefer people put in their bios on their blogs or say in their interviews? All their insults, insecurities and faults towards themselves? Saying one’s strengths does not mean a person is perfect, which is why people say so in certain specific roles, not claim they are good at every single type of job or role.
All new age practices/teachings, which emphasize relativity inevitably lead to spiritual narcissism, precisely because of that relativity that allows us to define good and evil for ourselves to become as gods. We humans are so hopelessly corruptible that we simply cannot handle taking our own spiritual development onto ourselves even for a moment, lest we become demons without even knowing it. There is a reason the scriptures of major religions have a defined moral code and so that we don’t stray into darkness, and we couldn’t even follow that either. Now that we freed ourselves from the constraints of religious morality, we are free to become the demons that we are by nature, all while deluding ourselves into thinking we are heading towards the light. Lucifer was the first spiritual narcissist, and he is the ruler of this world, leading us all to repeat his folly. To end as he did. Only God can help us now.
Thank you Rob for sharing your thoughts. I agree that many new-age teachings and practices can lead to narcissism, simply by the very nature that they are not working toward something higher than themselves. Yes, there’s an internal ‘higher self’ we all intuitively feel, but if most people don’t embody this self then it can easily become a form of self-centered work.
This is the role religions of the past used to play, but as is evident from our cultural climate, they fail to provide the ‘spiritual experience’ the modern seeker wants. Religious have failed to adapt, and until they do, until they provide what the current seekers and longing for, beyond the ‘passive’ approach of being spoken at without feeling like they participate, without the patriarchal exclusions of women, without incorporating back more of the mystical aspects that we are all hungry for, the ‘devil’, will win for now.
That’s where you’re wrong, humans are not demons by default or that all new-age teachings ‘inevitably’ lead to spiritual narcissism as we all have a higher self or that we can be better, more awakened or conscious (although the notion of humans not being in-line with their higher self and hence becoming ‘demons’ is not out of the picture but it definitely isn’t the whole picture as there are people who have taken control of their own inner demons) and that is what Luna & Sol (and all of us, to an extent) are here for, to help us discern on what is the ego (spiritual narcissism) and what is true from the heart. That is why a new-age teaching like Shadow Work actually helps (or can help, at least) people, just think about the religious leaders who are into pedophilia, greed, power and other sinister things. If they could experience the Shadow Work and its benefits then this world might just be a better place since religious leaders are almost-always influential anyway. It is as Sol said, everyone; even the most problematic people and us all need that spiritual experience (or what is referred to in New-Age terms as ‘love’, but not just superficial and empty, high-vibration-only love but deep and true-lasting love that loves him/herself and everyone else around him/her) and if organized religion won’t give us that experience and it probably will never, then you might as well count it useless and unhelpful with our problems: both current and future, as a species. Besides, major religions are relative as well as they have their own moral codes anyway. So how do we know who is the right religion. Since you like talking about darkness anyway, the definition of darkness in each major religion is different. Eating pork in Islam is considered ‘evil’. If you eat pork, are you evil? A Christian wouldn’t say so. So to them, if you eat pork, you’re considered a ‘Lucifer’. But to a Christian, it’s normal.
What is your thought on telling somebody that he is a spiritual narcissist? I know the only way to heal his narcissism is for him to acknowledge it, but how can I get through?
In my opinion just tell them their spiritual ego is showing. If they haven’t read this article or seen the video, suggest it.
This is coming from someone who just realized they’re developing a spiritual ego.
The sooner the better.
I’ve seen a trend if people using “spiritualism” to dismiss other’s opinion and contradicting experiences. I’ve seen people talk down to others for “not being as positive and enlightened” as they are, regurgitating eastern philosophies while contradicting them in the next sentence. I’ve called it out several times. There is no ego is spiritualism, and if there is you aren’t as enlightened as you believe yourself to be. There’s more self-awareness to be had if your enlightenment comes from a condescending place. Great article!
Thank you Maria, I’ve encountered many similar situations before; it’s sadly a byproduct of ‘commodifying’ spirituality in a capitalist world alongside a lack of depth in understanding. Also note, ‘spiritualism’ is a movement around channeling Ghosts and spirits in seances, though often confused with ‘spirituality’ for sharing the same Spirit prefix.
this article opened my eyes lot, especially that spirituality is the trend on social media. I felt like I used spirituality as a scapegoat. Rather connecting to the divine. I was spirituality bypassing not getting to the root of my shadow self which tied to my inner child wounds not being addressed. I am lonely because I push people away if I feel they are not being supportive. I am a survivor of domestic abuse and statutory rape. I was hoping spirituality heal me from these events in my life. My ego felt like I was accepted to a community of the same spiritual belief . There were times I felt like I was odd because I didn’t look the spiritual part dressing…etc
It felt like I was in high school all over again. I even got caught in the trend starting a business online because everyone was doing it.
My ego wanted to show that I am capable of doing a online business as well and not remembering my purpose.
purchasing your shadow journal helped me understand my shadow
That’s beautiful, I’m so happy we could be part of your journey of rediscovering your way back to the soul. We’ve all fallen down that slippery slope of the spiritual ego, in a society that lacks any mature spiritual path; we are all prey to what appears to be ‘spiritual’ on the endless social media rabbit holes that exist. By confronting our shadows, we become aware of the depth that exists within us, and the seed of possibility to reconnect with it blossoms again.
It takes immense strength to walk this path, we’re blessed to witness those who decide to venture into it :). Thank you.
I have recently been through a terribly hurtful experience with someone who is a yoga teacher, and yoga tutor for an recognised body. I won’t go into the minute details here and have no desire to ‘name and shame’ but I just wanted to thank you for this post (and I know it’s a year old now), it has been a great help in reflecting on trauma caused by them… a bingo moment! I feel like I have come out of the mist and can see this person, who still tutors yoga here in the UK, for what they really are… a spiritual narcissist, and a clever one at that. I have felt under pressure not to call them out publicly (they inferred that I should stay quiet so as not to damage their public image) and they have never acknowledged their own behaviour has caused personal pain and difficulty. They skirt around what they did and responsibility for their actions using spiritual dharma talk to belittle – positioning themselves as superior and without responsibility… ‘some things just aren’t important’, ‘do what makes you happy’, ‘close the chapter’… and lots of other statements intended to downplay or sweep serious and damaging things under the (yoga)mat.
I understand Ahimsa and the principles of not causing others harm by words or thoughts, but it has been very saddening to be on the damaging end of spiritual narcissism and I also feel very sorry for other vulnerable or trusting people who get pulled into the world of a spritual narcissist. Isn’t this area something yoga governing bodies should have guidelines on, like the hippocratic oath of ethics for Doctors? Given the prevalence of yogi as celebrity and yogi/guru it would seem a good time for the instigation of a hippocratic oath of ethics for health, wellbeing and spritual practitioners to sign? Thank you again for this post, much to think about!
One Spiritual ego ‘tells’ should maybe on the list. Spiritual Narcissist often lose their sense of humour, I noticed. Humour brings ‘truth and spirituality’ in perspective, humour is the ability to laugh at your own shortcomings, predictions and an “I know what is good for you” attitude. Spiritual ego’s don’t laugh a lot discussing spirituality and their ‘high level’ and ‘accomplishments’. BTW Also a good Litmus test when judging teachers and guru’s. Without humour (any form, maybe be irony too) you better watch out. Big Ego’s, Dogmatism and Humour seldom mix.
Thank you Bert for the addition. I would thoroughly agree, anyone who takes themselves too seriously is a red flag that they’re overly invested and identified with the ‘false self’ they’re claiming to be aware of, it’s a great tell-tale sign :).
Thank you for your comment Bert….I’d never thought of that before. You are so right!
Spiritual narcissist is a guy that either created or has been using the /ng/ threads on /x/ at 4chan to basically infect people with bots (don’t ask, hell is an understatement) as one means to put a homunculus of himself in other people against their will. This seems to create a kind of network scenario where he treats himself as the server and everyone else as the clients, and if someone serves his ego they get loosh from the other users and if they don’t or are someone he has decided to tap into, or through, they get tortured. It sounds like a lot of work but it’s not because the system is self correcting and he focuses on the key players, all of which are equally narcisstic and steal things from people in similar ways. It’s easy to say Dark Night of Soul breeds paranoia. Until you are basically experiencing a bot version of him instead of yourself and in that torture screamed at him to stop raping you, only to find a complete stranger shows up and actually rapes you, speaking key phrases that were not said to many people at all, let alone on /x/ and then the next day /ng/ is talking about the rape saying “technically they raped themselves”.
Someone like that is the height of perversion.
To make matters worse there is an exchange that enables this: read deliberate theft. The mind has many protections. When you hit the noosphere though, you are vulnerable.
What a guy like that does is he jimmies out your mind and uses his tools to farm you off to his mates and they all torture you. Then months later you find them bragging about it on /x/ and talking about your life as if it were there’s (really specific stuff you didn’t tell them) using this energetic abuse system to force you to comment on there and other crimes.
So they say you are the crazy abuser now but you are not. They do things with your mind using their mind in both places. So your mind that wpuld not do any of that, not even go on 4chan in the first place is now in a loving hell.
While he is bragging about bliss; the kind of bliss your own mind deserves but is being denied because it’s in the wrong head. The bliss he experiences though is sadism. He enjoys hurting innocent people. Many excuses he makes, none of them are true.
This is a man so narcissistic that he is literally in his head EVERYONE ELSE to the exclusion of them being themselves in their own heads. It’s one thing to experience the connectedness of the noosphere or whatever, it’s another thing to engage in hostile coup de tats of the other minds there.
And yes he has a name, address and phone number. He is a real, physical human being. He is not a Nobody, he’s just a devil worshipping piece of shit that instead of seeing negative entities as something to avoid, he saw these as tools to control others, enhance his own experience at their expense, and more or less murder people.
And he doesn’t stop. He just sets up torture and goes and watches TV and laughs at it. You try and fix it, he breaks it. Then he goes and does more again. He actually finds this funny and calls the people acting as clients his “spooks”. Even if he takes a good person into himself, he does bad things. He turns good people bad.
You are worse for knowing him. He is incrementally better for knowing you. Put an archangel in his head, he uses the power to do devils work. But thinks he used to be evil and isn’t now, despite doing those things. He doesn’t comprehend basic morality. None of his mates do.
Thanks for your post..your words “basic morality” really touched me. I experienced the same, common sense, ethics, where not found on this person I was with..they were when it was on her advantage but not when it was about others,double standards..she even told me once that remorse and apologies are useless.OMG
Thank you for this. I am working through the painful end of a relationship with someone who has many of these qualities and although most of what others tell me are signs of a narcissist or quite toxic behaviors, I have had some cognitive dissonance because he seems to be “spiritual.” This information has helped me see through his masks and also take an honest look at myself and my own spiritual practices. Thank you for sharing.