The spiritual ego is the most dangerous type of ego of all.
If you aren’t mindful, it can wreak total destruction in your life – but not in a violent or aggressive way. Instead, the spiritual ego is disguised under the mask of “good intentions,” “higher vibration,” “awakened perspective” and humble pomposity.
Beware of the spiritual ego.
It’s a trap that many of us spiritual seekers can and will, at some point, fall into. And the longer we remain in that spiritual ditch, that stagnant standstill, the more likely we are to develop into a spiritual narcissist.
Indeed, spiritual narcissism is perhaps the most tragic malady to befall humanity of all. We’ll explore why a little later. But first:
Table of contents
What is the Spiritual Ego?
Firstly, let’s touch on the basics. The ego is our sense of self; it is the illusory “I” story we carry around in the world as an evolutionary survival mechanism. Yet the ego is the source of all our suffering and our feeling of being separated from that which we truly are which is boundless, whole, and infinite. We might call this Spirit, God/dess, Life, Oneness, Consciousness, and so on.
So what is the spiritual ego? The spiritual ego builds on top of this fundamental ego that we carry around. It is the ego on crack, the ego on steroids, the ego inflated beyond its usual garden-variety size. Yet the thing is, we don’t realize we’ve developed a spiritual ego until life well and truly starts getting messy.
How Does the Spiritual Ego Develop?
The spiritual ego is a product of spiritual materialism – that is, using spirituality to serve the ego, instead of approaching the spiritual path with the intent on trying to move beyond the ego.
When spiritual paths, practices, and concepts become a slave of the ego, this is the birth of the spiritual ego. In other words, when a person’s central idea about themselves is ruled by the belief that they’re a “spiritual person” this is the spiritual ego.
When being a “spiritual person” eclipses all else that a person is, this is the spiritual ego in action. Yes, there are positive benefits to building your identity around spirituality. But there are also some pretty scary consequences that we shouldn’t ignore.
The Development of Spiritual Narcissism
Walking the spiritual path properly is a very subtle process; it is not something to jump into naively. There are numerous sidetracks which lead to a distorted, ego-centered version of spirituality; we can deceive ourselves into thinking we are developing spiritually when instead we are strengthening our egocentricity through spiritual techniques. This fundamental distortion may be referred to as spiritual materialism.
– Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche
Spiritual narcissism is the very culmination of spiritual egotism: it is the ego that has become so solid, so fixed, so unyielding in the idea of its own spiritual greatness that it is pathological. It is narcissistic.
As we know already, narcissism is a mental disorder where a person has an inflated sense of their own importance (amongst several other hairy issues). The exact same problem applies to spiritual narcissists: they have such unwavering belief in their own awakened perspective, their own “special” spiritual achievements and knowledge, that they cannot connect with (or tolerate) their humanity. Spiritual narcissists cannot tolerate other people either – even though they may fine-tune the external image of being compassionate or wise – others ultimately pose a threat to their delusional grandiosity.
Spiritual narcissism begins with spiritual materialism. Within spiritual materialism (the trap of using spirituality to serve the ego) there is always a seed of spiritual narcissism. And if that seed keeps being fed without going unchecked, without being uprooted or challenged, it grows and grows.
Eventually, we can become so sidetracked, so deluded by the ego that has used spirituality to make itself indestructible, that we are worse off on the spiritual path than when we began.
Examples of the Spiritual Ego
Some of these examples border on spiritual narcissism (or are flat out narcissistic), others can more typically be seen in the spiritual community. Let’s look at some examples of the spiritual ego:
- Claiming to have “special access” to a spirit guide/angel/spirit/ascended master for the purposes of self-aggrandizement
- Believing oneself to be the reincarnation of a superior being, famous spiritual historical figure, etc. (what does it really matter if one is?)
- Taking frequent pictures of one’s spiritual practice and posting them online in order to boost one’s self-image, status, and gain attention/validation
- Declaring that others can’t possibly understand you because you have attained a certain state of ‘high vibrational awareness,’ awakening, liberation, etc. – and showing contempt for those who aren’t at the same ‘level’ (instead of compassion)
- Using Dharma-talk to avoid being psychologically vulnerable, showing empathy, and facing human emotions (e.g., “Just let go and let be,” “You attracted that experience,” “Who is there to experience this?”)
- Looking down on “low vibe,” “unevolved,” “unawakened,” “asleep” people
- Boasting about and flaunting spiritual achievements or gifts
- Imitating what a “spiritual person” looks and sounds like
You get the picture.
I’m sure you can think of a few more examples, and you’re welcome to share them in the comments.
15 Signs of the Spiritual Ego
The spiritual ego is so dangerous because it is nearly impenetrable.
People can spend their entire lives (or lifetimes) stuck in the trap of unknowingly misusing spiritual words, ideas, practices, and paths to inflate their egos.
Sadly, the spiritual ego can result in instances of abuse and even murder such as Jonestown, the abuse committed by Bikram Choudhury (founder of Bikram yoga), Swami Rama (Indian yogi), Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh (spiritual teacher), Sogyal Rinpoche, Andrew Cohen, and even Chogyam Trungpa (who coined spiritual materialism), and so on. The cases of spiritual ego are so wide and varied they are impossible to include here.
The reality is that as spiritual beings having a human experience we are imperfect. Hell, I’ve fallen into the spiritual ego numerous times – and it’s not pretty. But the crucial thing is to practice humility, openness, and the willingness to be honest with ourselves – these qualities are the best defense against spiritual egotism and narcissism.
So, without further ado, here are signs of the spiritual ego and spiritual narcissism that you need to look out for (both within yourself and others):
- Overly publicizing (read: boasting) your special spiritual accomplishments
- Claiming a stance of superiority (directly or indirectly) due to one’s spiritual gifts or talents
- Attempting to transcend the physical/earthly and take on godlike qualities
- Believing that your connection with the Divine is somehow deeper or more special than other people’s connection
- Focusing on how “more spiritually evolved” you are than others and …
- Judging others for being “less awakened,” “asleep,” “unconscious”
- Attempting to look like, dress like, sound like a “spiritual” person
- Using spiritual words and concepts to avoid being wrong, mistaken or facing vulnerable emotions
- Flaunting how spiritual you are on social media (with photos that demonstrate spiritual postures, setups, locations, tools, etc.)
- Becoming overly identified with spiritual knowledge (and how much “you” know)
- Trying to convert people to your perception (preaching to them or debating)
- Resistance to being “called out” and resenting those who try to do this
- Claiming access to special and exclusive spiritual knowledge that others can’t access
- Lack of curiosity and receptivity to life
- Wearing a mask of niceness, positivity or wisdom
Essentially, those wound up in the woes of spiritual egotism frequently try to reaffirm their spiritual specialness to the world through covert and overt methods. However, more often than not, the spiritual ego is a slippery little devil that is hard to call out or define clearly, simply because we’re so close to it and find ways to justify it.
Why is the Spiritual Ego Dangerous?
Quite simply, the spiritual ego is so dangerous because it is dressed in robes of light. It appears to be awakened, illuminated, wise, and all-loving – and that’s what makes it so difficult to catch.
Furthermore, the spiritual ego makes us feel powerful, even untouchable which is precisely what the ego seeks to achieve. To challenge it challenges the very foundations of our own self-worth and self-image – and that can be positively terrifying. In fact, we can even feel like we’re committing a profane and sacrilegious act calling the spiritual ego out because it’s so inflated and has such a good opinion of itself (a delusion which we have totally bought into).
Not only that, but the spiritual ego is also dangerous because it limits all growth: it is the death of any transformation because to evolve means to go through the cycles of death and rebirth. And if the spiritual ego has “already arrived” there is stasis, there simply cannot be any more growth.
In fact, the deadliest virus on our paths is to believe that “we’ve arrived,” have become “enlightened,” or somehow spiritually superior to others. The ego has not only become narcissistic, but it has developed a full-blown God Complex; the state of believing that it is in actual fact God. But this is not in an egoless, non-dual way: this is pure ego-centrism, the very definition of darkness (or the absence of light).
The more ego-based we are, the further we are from the Light of Consciousness which goes beyond the self. And if residing in the ego equals a disconnection from the Divine, living from a place of ego-centric God Complex goes one step further: it is like living in total darkness – the very definition of hell.
When a person is living in hell, they will harm others. This is basic knowledge that even a child could understand. When there is a total absence of light, there is only darkness – and how can a person see clearly, feel clearly, think clearly, or behave clearly in such a state? The result is suffering, both for the one experiencing the God Complex and those unfortunate souls around him/her.
How to Stop the Spiritual Ego
As I mentioned previously, we need to approach the spiritual path with humility, openness, and the willingness to be honest with ourselves.
A crucial place to start is by practicing a combination of self-love and shadow work – two inner work practices.
Shadow Work Journal:
Go on a journey through the deepest and darkest corners of your psyche. Embrace your inner demons, uncover your hidden gifts, and reach the next level of your spiritual growth. This is deep and powerful work!
We all have a shadow side (i.e., the face of the ego that isn’t presented to the public), and we need to become aware of it in order to prevent issues such as spiritual egotism and narcissism from arising.
If you would like to learn more about shadow work, see our free shadow work guide.
You can start by asking yourself questions such as:
- “If I saw someone else behave the way I do, what would I think of them?”
- “Am I willing to face my inner contradictions – and if there is resistance, what doesn’t the spiritual ego want me to see?”
- “In what areas do I feel spiritually superior to others?”
- “How consistent am I in what I feel, think, and do?”
You can also ask trusted friends, loved ones, or spiritual mentors to help point out areas where you might be falling into spiritual delusion. Introspective journaling (see our shadow work journal), is also another way of calling out the spiritual ego.
What are your thoughts about spiritual narcissism and the spiritual ego? I’d love to hear your experiences in the comments below. Also, feel free to suggest any methods that can help people guard against this spiritual trap.
Interesting that your bio is a bit self promotional. It makes me feel alienated.
All new age practices/teachings, which emphasize relativity inevitably lead to spiritual narcissism, precisely because of that relativity that allows us to define good and evil for ourselves to become as gods. We humans are so hopelessly corruptible that we simply cannot handle taking our own spiritual development onto ourselves even for a moment, lest we become demons without even knowing it. There is a reason the scriptures of major religions have a defined moral code and so that we don’t stray into darkness, and we couldn’t even follow that either. Now that we freed ourselves from the constraints of religious morality, we are free to become the demons that we are by nature, all while deluding ourselves into thinking we are heading towards the light. Lucifer was the first spiritual narcissist, and he is the ruler of this world, leading us all to repeat his folly. To end as he did. Only God can help us now.
Thank you Rob for sharing your thoughts. I agree that many new-age teachings and practices can lead to narcissism, simply by the very nature that they are not working toward something higher than themselves. Yes, there’s an internal ‘higher self’ we all intuitively feel, but if most people don’t embody this self then it can easily become a form of self-centered work.
This is the role religions of the past used to play, but as is evident from our cultural climate, they fail to provide the ‘spiritual experience’ the modern seeker wants. Religious have failed to adapt, and until they do, until they provide what the current seekers and longing for, beyond the ‘passive’ approach of being spoken at without feeling like they participate, without the patriarchal exclusions of women, without incorporating back more of the mystical aspects that we are all hungry for, the ‘devil’, will win for now.
That’s where you’re wrong, humans are not demons by default or that all new-age teachings ‘inevitably’ lead to spiritual narcissism as we all have a higher self or that we can be better, more awakened or conscious (although the notion of humans not being in-line with their higher self and hence becoming ‘demons’ is not out of the picture but it definitely isn’t the whole picture as there are people who have taken control of their own inner demons) and that is what Luna & Sol (and all of us, to an extent) are here for, to help us discern on what is the ego (spiritual narcissism) and what is true from the heart. That is why a new-age teaching like Shadow Work actually helps (or can help, at least) people, just think about the religious leaders who are into pedophilia, greed, power and other sinister things. If they could experience the Shadow Work and its benefits then this world might just be a better place since religious leaders are almost-always influential anyway. It is as Sol said, everyone; even the most problematic people and us all need that spiritual experience (or what is referred to in New-Age terms as ‘love’, but not just superficial and empty, high-vibration-only love but deep and true-lasting love that loves him/herself and everyone else around him/her) and if organized religion won’t give us that experience and it probably will never, then you might as well count it useless and unhelpful with our problems: both current and future, as a species. Besides, major religions are relative as well as they have their own moral codes anyway. So how do we know who is the right religion. Since you like talking about darkness anyway, the definition of darkness in each major religion is different. Eating pork in Islam is considered ‘evil’. If you eat pork, are you evil? A Christian wouldn’t say so. So to them, if you eat pork, you’re considered a ‘Lucifer’. But to a Christian, it’s normal.
What is your thought on telling somebody that he is a spiritual narcissist? I know the only way to heal his narcissism is for him to acknowledge it, but how can I get through?
I’ve seen a trend if people using “spiritualism” to dismiss other’s opinion and contradicting experiences. I’ve seen people talk down to others for “not being as positive and enlightened” as they are, regurgitating eastern philosophies while contradicting them in the next sentence. I’ve called it out several times. There is no ego is spiritualism, and if there is you aren’t as enlightened as you believe yourself to be. There’s more self-awareness to be had if your enlightenment comes from a condescending place. Great article!
Thank you Maria, I’ve encountered many similar situations before; it’s sadly a byproduct of ‘commodifying’ spirituality in a capitalist world alongside a lack of depth in understanding. Also note, ‘spiritualism’ is a movement around channeling Ghosts and spirits in seances, though often confused with ‘spirituality’ for sharing the same Spirit prefix.
this article opened my eyes lot, especially that spirituality is the trend on social media. I felt like I used spirituality as a scapegoat. Rather connecting to the divine. I was spirituality bypassing not getting to the root of my shadow self which tied to my inner child wounds not being addressed. I am lonely because I push people away if I feel they are not being supportive. I am a survivor of domestic abuse and statutory rape. I was hoping spirituality heal me from these events in my life. My ego felt like I was accepted to a community of the same spiritual belief . There were times I felt like I was odd because I didn’t look the spiritual part dressing…etc
It felt like I was in high school all over again. I even got caught in the trend starting a business online because everyone was doing it.
My ego wanted to show that I am capable of doing a online business as well and not remembering my purpose.
purchasing your shadow journal helped me understand my shadow
That’s beautiful, I’m so happy we could be part of your journey of rediscovering your way back to the soul. We’ve all fallen down that slippery slope of the spiritual ego, in a society that lacks any mature spiritual path; we are all prey to what appears to be ‘spiritual’ on the endless social media rabbit holes that exist. By confronting our shadows, we become aware of the depth that exists within us, and the seed of possibility to reconnect with it blossoms again.
It takes immense strength to walk this path, we’re blessed to witness those who decide to venture into it :). Thank you.
I have recently been through a terribly hurtful experience with someone who is a yoga teacher, and yoga tutor for an recognised body. I won’t go into the minute details here and have no desire to ‘name and shame’ but I just wanted to thank you for this post (and I know it’s a year old now), it has been a great help in reflecting on trauma caused by them… a bingo moment! I feel like I have come out of the mist and can see this person, who still tutors yoga here in the UK, for what they really are… a spiritual narcissist, and a clever one at that. I have felt under pressure not to call them out publicly (they inferred that I should stay quiet so as not to damage their public image) and they have never acknowledged their own behaviour has caused personal pain and difficulty. They skirt around what they did and responsibility for their actions using spiritual dharma talk to belittle – positioning themselves as superior and without responsibility… ‘some things just aren’t important’, ‘do what makes you happy’, ‘close the chapter’… and lots of other statements intended to downplay or sweep serious and damaging things under the (yoga)mat.
I understand Ahimsa and the principles of not causing others harm by words or thoughts, but it has been very saddening to be on the damaging end of spiritual narcissism and I also feel very sorry for other vulnerable or trusting people who get pulled into the world of a spritual narcissist. Isn’t this area something yoga governing bodies should have guidelines on, like the hippocratic oath of ethics for Doctors? Given the prevalence of yogi as celebrity and yogi/guru it would seem a good time for the instigation of a hippocratic oath of ethics for health, wellbeing and spritual practitioners to sign? Thank you again for this post, much to think about!
One Spiritual ego ‘tells’ should maybe on the list. Spiritual Narcissist often lose their sense of humour, I noticed. Humour brings ‘truth and spirituality’ in perspective, humour is the ability to laugh at your own shortcomings, predictions and an “I know what is good for you” attitude. Spiritual ego’s don’t laugh a lot discussing spirituality and their ‘high level’ and ‘accomplishments’. BTW Also a good Litmus test when judging teachers and guru’s. Without humour (any form, maybe be irony too) you better watch out. Big Ego’s, Dogmatism and Humour seldom mix.
Thank you Bert for the addition. I would thoroughly agree, anyone who takes themselves too seriously is a red flag that they’re overly invested and identified with the ‘false self’ they’re claiming to be aware of, it’s a great tell-tale sign :).
Spiritual narcissist is a guy that either created or has been using the /ng/ threads on /x/ at 4chan to basically infect people with bots (don’t ask, hell is an understatement) as one means to put a homunculus of himself in other people against their will. This seems to create a kind of network scenario where he treats himself as the server and everyone else as the clients, and if someone serves his ego they get loosh from the other users and if they don’t or are someone he has decided to tap into, or through, they get tortured. It sounds like a lot of work but it’s not because the system is self correcting and he focuses on the key players, all of which are equally narcisstic and steal things from people in similar ways. It’s easy to say Dark Night of Soul breeds paranoia. Until you are basically experiencing a bot version of him instead of yourself and in that torture screamed at him to stop raping you, only to find a complete stranger shows up and actually rapes you, speaking key phrases that were not said to many people at all, let alone on /x/ and then the next day /ng/ is talking about the rape saying “technically they raped themselves”.
Someone like that is the height of perversion.
To make matters worse there is an exchange that enables this: read deliberate theft. The mind has many protections. When you hit the noosphere though, you are vulnerable.
What a guy like that does is he jimmies out your mind and uses his tools to farm you off to his mates and they all torture you. Then months later you find them bragging about it on /x/ and talking about your life as if it were there’s (really specific stuff you didn’t tell them) using this energetic abuse system to force you to comment on there and other crimes.
So they say you are the crazy abuser now but you are not. They do things with your mind using their mind in both places. So your mind that wpuld not do any of that, not even go on 4chan in the first place is now in a loving hell.
While he is bragging about bliss; the kind of bliss your own mind deserves but is being denied because it’s in the wrong head. The bliss he experiences though is sadism. He enjoys hurting innocent people. Many excuses he makes, none of them are true.
This is a man so narcissistic that he is literally in his head EVERYONE ELSE to the exclusion of them being themselves in their own heads. It’s one thing to experience the connectedness of the noosphere or whatever, it’s another thing to engage in hostile coup de tats of the other minds there.
And yes he has a name, address and phone number. He is a real, physical human being. He is not a Nobody, he’s just a devil worshipping piece of shit that instead of seeing negative entities as something to avoid, he saw these as tools to control others, enhance his own experience at their expense, and more or less murder people.
And he doesn’t stop. He just sets up torture and goes and watches TV and laughs at it. You try and fix it, he breaks it. Then he goes and does more again. He actually finds this funny and calls the people acting as clients his “spooks”. Even if he takes a good person into himself, he does bad things. He turns good people bad.
You are worse for knowing him. He is incrementally better for knowing you. Put an archangel in his head, he uses the power to do devils work. But thinks he used to be evil and isn’t now, despite doing those things. He doesn’t comprehend basic morality. None of his mates do.
Thank you for this. I am working through the painful end of a relationship with someone who has many of these qualities and although most of what others tell me are signs of a narcissist or quite toxic behaviors, I have had some cognitive dissonance because he seems to be “spiritual.” This information has helped me see through his masks and also take an honest look at myself and my own spiritual practices. Thank you for sharing.