To many of us, self-awareness is like a mythical unicorn:
Sometimes, we catch fleeting glimpses of it. But as soon as we’ve spotted it, it vanishes into thin air.
What is this mysterious quality that we think we possess, but actually rarely do? Most importantly, WHY is self-awareness so important?
In a nutshell, being self-aware is an essential part of the spiritual journey.
In fact, without this fundamental quality, there can be no hope for spiritual or psychological growth.
Self-awareness is the very first stepping stone towards expanded consciousness and experiences such as:
- Deeper self-understanding
- More self-compassion
- Increased love for others
- Realization of one’s True Nature
I’ll explore the many benefits later …
But in the meantime, let’s attempt to paint a picture of this magical and oh-so-sly unicorn.
Table of contents
What is Self-Awareness?
Self-awareness is the ability to introspect and be aware of your own thoughts, feelings, impulses, physical sensations, and behaviors.
At a basic level, self-awareness is the ability to pay attention to who you are and what makes you tick. At more complex levels, self-awareness involves developing an understanding of your deeper beliefs, inner wounds, mental and emotional defense mechanisms, and repressed unconscious material – also known as self-understanding.
So what’s the difference between self-understanding and self-awareness?
Quite simply, self-awareness is recognizing your inner landscape. On the other hand, self-understanding is about using that self-awareness to figure out something about yourself. Do you see the subtle difference?
What about self-awareness and consciousness … are they the same thing?
No. They aren’t. The difference between humans and most animals is that humans possess both self-awareness and consciousness, while most animals only possess instinctual consciousness.
According to one Scientific American article,
Consciousness is awareness of one’s body and one’s environment; self-awareness is recognition of that consciousness.
In other words, consciousness is an external focus, while self-awareness is an internal focus.
Self-Awareness Examples
Intellectually understanding self-awareness is all fine and dandy. But let’s go to the next level. What does self-awareness actually look like in action? Here are some self-awareness examples:
Angela:
Angela keeps falling into toxic relationships with unavailable men. Finally, after her fifth failed relationship she has a revelation, “some unhealed part of me is attracting these men into my life.” She has experienced a moment of self-awareness.
Daniel:
Daniel has a weight issue that has caused diabetes. After coming back from work each day he goes on a massive food binge. Suddenly, while cramming a jammy doughnut into his mouth he realizes, “I always binge eat after coming back from work. Work must really stress me out.” He has had a moment of self-awareness.
Patricia:
Patricia struggles to make genuine connections with others – she also has an addiction to talking about people behind their backs. In the middle of a conversation with her no-nonsense work partner, the conversations come to a halt. “Why are you always gossiping about other people, Patricia?” Suddenly, a lightbulb goes off within Patricia’s head and she realizes why she can’t make genuine friends. She has temporarily become self-aware.
Jayla:
Jayla constantly gets into arguments with other people. She thinks it’s because others are out to get her, but she doesn’t realize how poor her communication skills are. After interrupting her sister for the twentieth time, her sister explodes. “Why do you keep fucking interrupting me, Jayla? Just let me TALK already. It’s no wonder you’re constantly arguing with everyone – they can’t stand talking to you! Show some damn respect and let other people talk for once.” Jayla bursts into tears, realizing the harsh truth behind her sister’s words. She has experienced self-awareness.
Lebron:
Lebron has been in the dating game for years, but still hasn’t found “the one.” In the middle of a bout of depression, he realizes that he’s only been chasing after the girls his parents approve of. He has experienced a moment of self-awareness. On the next date he goes on, he decides to listen to his instincts rather than the voices of his parents in his head. After a few more dates he finds his soulmate thanks to listening to his intuition. His life has changed thanks to self-awareness.
A few other examples of being aware include:
- Self-awareness of your genuine feelings and emotions
- Self-awareness of your beliefs
- Self-awareness of your prejudices and biases
- Self-awareness of the way you interact with others
- Self-awareness of your habits
- Self-awareness of how you wish to be perceived
- Self-awareness of your worst fears
- Self-awareness of inner conflicts
- Self-awareness of your goals and dreams
- Self-awareness of being aware (e.g., during meditation and contemplation)
Why is Self-Awareness Important?
Developing self-awareness is so important because without it we can easily become stuck in toxic patterns for years, even an entire lifetime (as many people unfortunately experience).
Self-awareness is the very foundation of all emotional, psychological, and spiritual growth.
A lack of self-awareness results in living an inauthentic and chaotic life that is driven by untamed impulses, unconscious habits, and unquestioned beliefs. To put it simply, self-awareness is so important because without it we become self-destructive.
How many times have you come across people who make the same mistakes, over and over again?
These people lack self-awareness.
How many times have you seen people thrive on drama and self-destructive behavior?
These people lack self-awareness.
What about those who inflict unspeakable violence upon others?
These people also lack self-awareness.
What about those who live most of their lives in boring, stagnant, and meaningless routines?
These people lack self-awareness.
Do you get the drift?
Give me any human problem and I will be able to trace it back to a lack of self-awareness.
It’s a tragically honest reality.
BUT, there is hope – and that is to make becoming self-aware a personal mission.
When you become a model of self-awareness, others around you will also be positively influenced – this is the true meaning of “Be the change you wish to see in the world” – it’s cliche, but it’s so true!
Becoming self-aware is the number one thing you can do to make big shifts in your life and it is the foundation of the spiritual awakening journey.
But first:
Why is it So Damn Hard to Be Self-Aware?
Let’s get straight into answering the question, “Why is it so damn hard to be self-aware?”
Reason #1 – Your Ego
The ego (the identity or sense of self that you carry) is a tricky little bugger.
In order to maintain an image of itself, it must sustain and defend anything that challenges its existence. Inevitably, this need to “keep up the image” involves a whole lot of sly self-deception, resistance, subversiveness, and even a blatant avoidance of reality.
As one person on Quora provocatively observed, “In short, the ego is a bullshit factory, and that process prefers to be undisturbed and unobserved.”
However, we also must be thankful for our egos. Without having an ego, or a separate sense of self, we would be incapable of distinguishing ourselves from the oncoming truck that’s speeding toward us.
Possessing an ego is a survival mechanism that helps us to ascertain what is ours vs. others – we absolutely need it to survive.
But there is a massive downside to having an ego (and you can read more about the ego’s shadow side here). The ego is diametrically opposed to self-awareness because being self-aware challenges, provokes, and sometimes even shatters the mask of the ego.
I’ll give you a few examples of why we prefer to avoid self-awareness below:
Example 1 – You’re having a fight with your partner for the fiftieth time that week. In a fit of rage, you smash your fist into the wall. “Why the hell did you do that you psycho!?!” your partner screams. You then bellow back, “I’M NOT THE PSYCHO YOU PSYCHO! I INTENDED TO SMASH MY FIST THROUGH THAT WALL! I’M COMPLETELY FINE! WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE A PSYCHO!?!” After your partner ends the relationship, you suddenly realize that you had been projecting your issues onto them all along. You discover how much of an angry asshole you are and realize you’re to blame for the relationship breakdown. Ouch. That sting of self-awareness hurts like hell.
Example 2 – After scrolling through your social media stream you start to feel depressed and inadequate. Everyone else seems to have a better and more exciting life than you. You then feel like a complete loser for the entire day. Suddenly, you have a lightbulb moment: you feel so horrible because you have low self-esteem. Immediately the thought of having low self-worth makes you feel like even more of a loser, so you suppress and ignore the insight.
I could probably write a few more pages of examples, but do you see what I mean? Self-awareness can often be too much for the ego to handle. (This is why it’s so important to practice self-awareness along with self-care and self-compassion.)
Reason #2 – Biological Programming
The next reason why self-awareness is so difficult is literally that it’s programmed into us to do most things on autopilot.
According to this Psychology Today article we operate on autopilot around 50% of the time. Can you imagine how difficult life would be if you had to remember to breathe, scratch your head, walk, blink, drive your car, use your phone, speak, and so forth?
Most of what we do is on autopilot for a good reason: it’s a much more efficient way to live! We have evolved to become terrifically time and energy-efficient creatures. In order to preserve energy and survive, we need to learn how to do things quickly.
Unfortunately, that means that a large percentage of our lives can be lived in robot mode. Therefore, self-awareness is so difficult because our biological programming makes it hard for us to be mindful.
So why, you may wonder, should we even bother to develop self-awareness if our psychology and biology seem to be working against us?
The answer is that, fortunately, we’re so much more than our minds and bodies – we also possess a heart and soul – and it is these emotional and transpersonal elements of our being that drive us towards self-awareness.
Becoming self-aware literally transforms every aspect of our lives for the better. We’ll explore how next:
Benefits of Self-Awareness
Developing self-awareness is one of the best paths you can ever take in this life. Here are some of the many benefits of self-awareness out there:
- You become more authentic and empowered to be yourself
- You develop a stronger connection with your intuition and inner wisdom
- Your relationships become more loving and peaceful
- You are more likely to discover your life purpose
- You’re able to overcome addictions more easily
- You become more self-supportive (rather than self-sabotaging)
- You feel more confident in social situations
- You’re able to change negative habits and mindsets
- You’re able to take care of your health much more effectively
- You live a more fulfilling life (that is based on your values, not others)
- You feel more connected to your Soul
- You feel more connected with existence
This is not an exhaustive list. There are WAY more benefits out there. But I just want to open a little door into the wondrous world of becoming self-aware.
Signs You Lack Self-Awareness
Are you a self-aware person? Think about this question for a minute.
How conscious are you really of the many thoughts, feelings, and impulses that emerge within you during the day? If you have a tendency to do any of the following, you lack self-awareness:
- You’re often unaware that your words or actions have hurt or offended another person (until they express it to you)
- You’re self-destructive and continue to make the same mistakes over and over again
- You have trouble identifying what exactly you’re feeling or thinking
- You struggle to identify what your true needs or desires are
- You have a habit of behaving without thinking (i.e., you’re impulsive)
- You’re often surprised by people’s perception of you (as they don’t match how you see yourself)
Through time, a lack of self-awareness can lead to depression, anxiety, repeatedly failed relationships, social issues, and even spiritual crises such as the Dark Night of the Soul.
11 Self-Awareness Activities For Spiritual Seekers
Developing self-awareness is the foundation of all important life changes and deep inner work.
The more self-aware we are, the more we can understand, accept, and love ourselves. And the more we love ourselves, the more we can love others. Can you see how this is all connected?
Go through the following self-awareness activities list and choose one practice that resonates with you. Try it out for one week and see how you feel. Then, repeat the process!
1. Tune in to your body
Your body is one of the most direct ways to connect with your emotions. If you tend to get lost in your head too much, practice scanning your body. Search for areas of tension or discomfort and ask, “What is happening here?”
For instance, you might find yourself clenching your fists or jaw and you might realize that you’re feeling angry. You might have tense shoulders and realize that you’re “carrying the weight of the world” on your shoulders. Or you might even discover that a persistent physical issue you have is connected with a stressful place or person.
Once you have become aware of the issue, you can then take steps to reduce your stress, anger, or sadness.
2. Identify your specific type of “body armor”
Body armoring was a concept developed by psychoanalyst Wilhelm Reich in the early 20th century and came to describe the process of storing traumatic experiences within the muscles of our bodies.
“The issue is within the tissue” in other words.
If you have a certain part of your body that is frequently sore, stiff, or full of pain, it is likely that there’s some kind of trapped or reinforced emotion stuck there. By paying attention to your body, you will be able to identify your type of body armor.
Read more about how to explore the emotions hidden in your muscle tension.
3. Ask someone to point out your blind spots
Yes, I know this initially sounds pretty damn scary. But it’s actually one of the most powerful self-awareness activities out there.
A word of caution, though: unless you want to be roasted, it’s better to find a trusted friend, counselor, spiritual guide, or coworker for this activity. You’ll want to ensure this person is close to you and feels comfortable with being honest. Then, ask them to reveal any weaknesses or unhelpful habits that you might possess.
Remember that for this task you have to mentally prepare yourself. You don’t want to ask someone to do a favor for you and then tear out their throat in anger! Facing our flaws can be confronting and distressing to the ego. So ensure that you’re in a calm and centered space beforehand. Practicing self-love will be crucial, so have some affirmations and other self-soothing resources on hand (just in case).
Studies have shown that our coworkers can evaluate our strengths and weaknesses twice as accurately as we can – they see things that we can’t or won’t see. The more people you seek out, the better. Make use of the insight others have in your life and use it to your advantage.
4. Stand in front of the mirror
A simple but powerful way of becoming more self-aware is to listen to your self-talk. The best way that I’ve found of doing this is to stand right in front of the mirror staring at yourself. Pay attention to what insecurities or negative self-judgments arise. What are the dominant feelings you experience? Mirror work will give you a direct insight into how you perceive yourself and therefore increase your self-awareness.
5. Think about your greatest strengths
Reflect on your accomplishments and the things you’re proud of. What do you like about yourself? Get a journal and record all of your discoveries. The more aware you are of your strengths, the more you’ll be able to make self-aware decisions that are aligned with your authentic self.
6. Explore your biggest weaknesses
It might seem unnecessary or even detrimental to explore your weaknesses, but as Ralph Waldo Emerson once wrote, “Our strength grows out of our weaknesses.”
Once you’re able to face and own these darker parts of yourself, the more freedom and power you will paradoxically experience.
My favorite way to explore weaknesses is by examining the shadow (read more about shadow work). To begin this process, make a habit of noticing whenever you experience strong emotions such as shame, guilt, anger, resentment, and fear. Ask, “What triggered these feelings?”
You might even like to keep a shadow journal to record your discoveries so that you can track your journey of self-awareness.
Learn more about how to journal.
7. What is your #1 distraction?
Our distractions tell us a great deal about our fears, impulses, and hidden desires.
What unnecessary task takes up a lot of your time? Perhaps it might be watching TV, online shopping, snacking, masturbating, scrolling through Instagram, playing video games, gossiping with friends, or even getting lost in daydreams.
Distraction isn’t always a bad thing, but when we obsessively find ways of escaping reality, there’s a problem. Draw awareness to your distractions, and you’ll be on the path to greater self-insight.
8. Practice meditation and mindfulness
Mindfulness means paying attention to the present moment, whereas meditation is learning how to become aware of your thoughts. Together, they make a dynamic duo.
Mindfulness helps to ground you in reality, which increases self-awareness. Meditation, on the other hand, is a way in which you can become intimately acquainted with your mind and its processes. Both practices can be incorporated relatively effortlessly into your day. If you have five or ten minutes to spare, take time to drop into your body and senses.
Here are some mindfulness exercises you may like to explore. I also recommend apps such as Calm to support your meditation practice.
9. Keep a daily ‘sunshine and sh*t’ journal
Record all the things you loved and hated within your day (aka. the sunshine and shit!). Write down how you felt, what your plans are, and anything else you’d like to express. Journaling is a simple and powerful form of self-expression that is a wonderful way to enhance your self-awareness.
10. What do you dislike the most in others?
“I hate people who are judgmental,” I once remember saying. My wise friend at the time turned around and retorted, “But aren’t you judging those people for being judgmental?” Oops. Yeah, it happens a lot.
Most of us aren’t even aware that we are projecting a lot of our shit onto other people. Why? Because when we disown the parts we dislike about ourselves, it’s easier to live with ourselves.
But the easy path is the lazy path. Self-growth isn’t always flowers and rainbows, and nor does it need to be. The reality is that if we want to become truly self-aware, we need to own our projections at some point or another. By reclaiming and embracing the denied, suppressed, and shunned aspects of ourselves, we feel more at peace with ourselves and those around us. This, of course, requires radical self-honesty.
Do you have the guts to own your projections? Check out my article on psychological projection to learn more.
11. Read books, take tests, attend workshops
Self-awareness is a life-long process – there is no real ‘end’ point because we are constantly morphing and evolving. It would be pretty boring if self-awareness could be condensed into a five-day retreat!
With this in mind, it’s important to have fun on the journey. There are so many intriguing ways to ‘peel back the layers’ of your psyche.
This entire website, for example, has hundreds of articles that can help increase your self-awareness. I’ve also designed a hell of a lot of free psychological and spiritual tests, which you can find in our free tests section.
So, in essence, have an insatiable thirst for self-knowledge. Go out there and watch lectures, attend workshops, and gain new skills. See life as a school and use every opportunity you can to increase your self-awareness and self-acceptance – it’s such a meaningful way to live life!
Self-Awareness For Advanced Learners
As rivers lose name and shape in the sea, wise men lose name and shape in God, glittering beyond all distance.
– Mundaka Upanishad
There comes a time when self-awareness evolves from simply understanding the nature of the self/identity to understanding the nature of the Self (with a capital ‘S’) or the spiritual essence of who we are.
With enough inner exploration, it becomes apparent that the mind is a very limited muscle, and although our intellect is a complex tool, it nevertheless understands a minute fragment of reality. Furthermore, it also becomes apparent that who you “think” you are is not truly what you are.
The following self-awareness exercise is for those who have developed a lot of insight about themselves but perhaps not very much insight about their spiritual Self or True Nature.
Ask the following seven questions …
- Am I this emotion?
- Am I this thought?
- Am I this physical sensation?
- Am I this circumstance?
- Am I this body?
- Am I this personality?
- Who am I?
If you reflect deeply on these questions, you’ll soon realize that everything within and without you arises totally spontaneously. You’ll discover that not only aren’t you defined by any of the above points, but you don’t consciously choose any of it either (and even the belief that you choose any of it arises spontaneously!). So, who are you?
If you’re none of these physical, emotional, or mental phenomena that are as transient as the wind, who are you? You will discover something amazing … you are nothing! But not a nothing that is void or depressing; a nothing that is full, vibrant, pure, loving, and eternal; a nothing that is paradoxically everything.
If you want to go deeper with your Self-awareness and explore this profound mystery more, I highly recommend checking out my self-inquiry, self-observation, and non-duality articles.
29 Self-Awareness Quotes
To close this article, I will end with some illuminating perspectives on self-awareness. I hope these thoughts motivate and inspire you:
Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.
– Aristotle
Self-awareness is a key to self-mastery.
– Gretchen Rubin
Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
― C.G. Jung
Self-love is a good thing, but self-awareness is more important. You need to once in a while go “Uh, I’m kind of an asshole.”
– Louis C. K.
Self-awareness involves deep personal honesty. It comes from asking and answering hard questions.
– Stephen Covey
He who knows others is wise. He who knows himself is enlightened.
– Lao Tzu
The greatest of faults is to be conscious of none.
– Thomas Carlyle
Awareness is the greatest agent for change.
– Eckhart Tolle
Self-awareness is one of the rarest of human commodities. I don’t mean self-consciousness where you’re limiting and evaluating yourself. I mean being aware of your own patterns.
– Tony Robbins
What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself.
– Abraham Maslow
Self-awareness includes awareness of your mental realm, which encompasses your thoughts, feelings, energy, and emotions.
– Deepak Chopra
I think self-awareness is probably the most important thing towards being a champion.
– Billie Jean King
Self-awareness gives you the capacity to learn from your mistakes as well as your successes. It enables you to keep growing.
– Lawrence Bossidy
Self-Awareness concerns knowing one’s internal states, preferences, resources, and intuitions.
– Daniel Goleman
Self-awareness is the ability to take an honest look at your life without any attachment to it being right or wrong, good or bad.
– Debbie Ford
The unexamined life is not worth living.
– Socrates
Self-awareness moves us beyond the old, well-worn pathways in the brain that support fixed, unconscious habits.
– D. Chopra
Without self-awareness we are as babies in the cradles.
– Virginia Woolf
In the light of calm and steady self-awareness, inner energies wake up and work miracles without any effort on your part.
– Nisargadatta Maharaj
Whenever you are about to find fault with someone, ask yourself the following question: What fault of mine most nearly resembles the one I am about to criticize?
– Marcus Aurelius
Wisdom tends to grow in proportion to one’s awareness of one’s ignorance.
– Anthony de Mello
The first step toward change is awareness. The second step is acceptance.
– Nathaniel Branden
As my awareness increases, my control over my own being increases.
– William Schutz
Being self-aware is not the absence of mistakes, but the ability to learn and correct them.
– Daniel Chidiac
Spiritual progress is born out of self-awareness.
– Deborah King
The most fundamental aggression to ourselves, the most fundamental harm we can do to ourselves, is to remain ignorant by not having the courage and the respect to look at ourselves honestly and gently.
– Pema Chödrön
Without awareness, we are not truly alive.
– J. Bugental
There’s a mess inside you: You clean the outside.
– The Dhammapada
Never become a slave to your own thinking and your own self. Understand that you are continuously changing. But, in which way you will change is your free will.
– R. Papian
Final Words
Self-awareness is the essential building block of inner transformation and spiritual awakening.
Remember: without self-awareness, there can be no emotional, psychological, or spiritual growth.
Without self-awareness, we can’t experience the joy of living in healthy relationships, finding meaningful jobs, or even just enjoying day-to-day existence.
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That’s how important self-awareness is. It truly is fundamental to EVERY aspect of life.
So tell me, what is your relationship with self-awareness like? I’d love to hear in the comments!
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Some one once said in answer to my probing about his life style that he was “proud of his own humility” His humour not mine. But sounded very well suited to the person. Whom knew how to talk in high language, but thought nothing of who he was as a person. Very self destructive in nature yet full of the awareness of life.
How often do we come up with these good intentions, where we start out with self important concepts that we feel are right and well placed for the moment, only to discover mid way by someone else’s concept which changes our awareness completely as it makes us re think our values and pull up the shirt tails of our awareness into a new light.
One personal experience was with my neighbour. A very narcistic person who’s replies to my conversations were always cutting pull me downs to her ways of thinking. Which made me very annoyed and negative towards her presence. This continued for awhile till I took time out to replay our conversation in mind several times, looking at both the positive and negative on both sides. To discover how to handle narcistic people. Along the way though I fell head long into discovering that I was at fault too. As heavy Caring for my wife had left me with some deep depressive and negative approaches and judgemental concepts which I had failed to see happening within. So when this was revealed a transfer or shift happened which changed my awareness of how to handle my neighbour from angry feelings to a calm approach and helped me to seek out clips and reading material to help my subconscious to re wire itself out of judgements and negativity towards life.
So thanks Sol and Luna for reminding me of this shift or transfer in awareness. As it seems we are never to old to lose some pride and find humility harmony and peace in new awareness.
“As it seems we are never to old to lose some pride and find humility harmony and peace in new awareness.” – well said John, well said. To continue learning is to continue living. When we aren’t humbled, we’re usually in a state of unaware and blind delusion, which is really like being a zombie. Much better the stings of self-awareness than the drug-like stupor of unconsciousness.
This is the thing that that is most important thing to me in life. I loved reading about it!
♡
I love you guys ! Y’all helped me a hell of a lot but I know I still help understanding thoee like I read & take notes but there’s nothing like one on one time . Lol okay imma go but Thank You guys so much I love y’all
Thanks so much Kenisha, I really appreciate your affirming words!
hi, love the article, but am puzzled by this quote from you. can you help me out?
Quite simply, self-awareness is recognizing your inner landscape. On the other hand, self-understanding is about using that self-awareness to figure out something about yourself. Do you see the subtle difference?
Yes, self-awareness is about that open presence (being aware, which is usually passive), but self-knowledge is about taking that awareness and using it to some purpose (it’s more active). Both are two sides of the same coin. I hope that makes sense. :)
I have been self-aware for awhile, but at times, I just didn’t know what to do with it. Being a sensitive person, if I entered into or shared my self awareness with people I cared about, it was told I was going to deep or seeing things too differently. I guess it is called gaslighting in today’s world. It did control me and my thinking because I was put aside for the inner work I was doing. If I tried to explain, the hole got deeper. In a way, my self awareness and attempts to share it was so different from my family, I was pretty much accused of being self-centered as I tried to grow. I am learning to not to do this with these people. It’s better for everyone. Those are my boundaries to protect my slow inner discoveries. I will share my growth with my journal until I can find some safe people to share with. Hopefully that won’t be a long time. Your article was very helpful especially with the shadow work. and balance.
Hi Margaret.
What you share about not having safe people to share your self-discoveries with I have experienced too in the past, so my heart really goes out to you. It’s such a painful thing to be gaslighted into believing that “you’re crazy,” “self-centered,” or “there’s something wrong with you” for looking within. In reality, such a rejection of your experience shows how much these people need to do their OWN inner work! (But unfortunately, as always, not something we can control!) I am inspired by that part within you that was wiser and didn’t listen to the words of such people, and continued your inner exploration. Setting boundaries is so needed and necessary and I truly hope you find that person or group of people in-person to be able to share with. For now, I hope that sharing here has been a good outlet for you. With love and support ♡
People can only go as deep with others as they have with themselves
Thanks for your efforts, I truly enjoy discovering about all the articles and tests on this website, I am very curious about the unknown, naturally.
We often become self-aware without realizing it, even before knowing something called, spiritual awakening.
I remember the very first self-realization, not so long before, when I discovered that I am not the mind, but the ‘observing self’, exactly after that, I got excited so much, ‘Yay am getting enlightened very soon!’
without considering the traps in the journey.
However, I am trying shadow work now, I met very shadowed parts of me, like the most dominant one:
Regarding that I am usually an extremely absent-minded teenager, I asked myself, ‘Why do you like to escape reality?’ I waited for a bit to reflect and to meditate, and so, I realized, from the reply of a part in me, that the cause of this problem is that it hates deeply everything I see, hear, or live in general, a deep hatred and resentment from the people I see in street, or even my family, so it prefers living in imaginations, and that explains my unease too.
So, as a solution, I start practices that help me embrace reality how it is.
And yes! For the projections, It is funny how I feel myself loathing those ‘conformist’, and how they do not go out of their traditions. But of course, I was just suppressing the part of me that wanted appreciation from others very badly…
Thank you so much for sharing this Haytam. :)
What I love about this discussion and the topic of self-awareness, in general, is of course, the shadow! (I feel like the Morticia Addams of spirituality haha)
When you mention the shadowy part of you that hates everything, I can relate to that because I’ve met that part within myself too! It is indeed such a shock to come across such a dark part, the part that truly despises everything and everyone. That is why, as you say, learning through practices such as meditation that we aren’t our thoughts and feelings is *so* crucial. If I hadn’t realized that my thoughts and feelings don’t define me, I would have truly suffered from this meeting of such a dark part. Self-awareness, meditation, and the discovery of the shadow are all so intertwined; one leads to another, and one is necessary to discover the other.
I appreciate your reflections as they’ve helped me to reflect too!
Excellent article, you really covered all the bases. The universe has our backs but life gets in the way. Great suggestions in here. Thank you for re-posting
Thanks L!
So hard to admit I have a problem with self-awareness in the first place. My ego doesn’t want anyone to know! lol
Haha, I know that feeling Enjay! The fact that you’re aware of your ego though is a good sign!
Most amazing and mind blowing self awareness I have had, would be learning that it never ends. I began self awareness in a.a. but had my mind blown by this article! Prior to this last relationship I took a almost 7 year inner journey, finally felt or so i thought ready to try a relationship again. Yet in reading, taking notes, and jumping from article to article that catches my eye…I still had some pretty deep shitty shit to address. Even though I knew about a few before learning from all you have to offer. But like I said when I was 14 with my own quote living to learn, we shall learn to live. Crystal L.M.
I completely agree, it doesn’t end. And when it does, it’s often just being neglected or ignored, self-knowledge is an ever-evolving thing, though I’m not a fan of the ‘accelerate’ types either who take it to an extreme. Just being aware of the unfolding needs and creating a safe space to let them unfold is often enough.
Know that you’re not alone though in the many layers to address, we’re all in the same boat, though slowly our point of reference, our sense of self, becomes less rigid and static. That state of peace as it all unfolds is where this journey is leading us to.
I wish you well :)
The self awareness that I am exactly where I am meant to be at this moment.