If you’ve ever traveled to a new and unknown country/city, you’ve most likely felt the tingling excitement of wanting to experience as much as you can … but not knowing where to start.
You ask locals, seek out information, and read maps.
In essence, you’re looking for guidance; someone who has already traveled the paths, knows the byroads, and is able to point out the dangers and problems along the way.
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The journey of reconnecting with your Soul (Soul Work) is much the same. Without any map, we need a guide who can give us the right directions, the necessary encouragement, and someone who can help us avoid the clutches of the ego.
The inner journey is the most difficult and challenging undertaking that we can ever make. When most people start the spiritual journey, they make the mistake of using the ego’s voice and limitations to guide themselves.
But using the ego to seek transcendence is like asking a fish to describe what water is: it can’t possibly know what it’s really looking for!
Without mature spiritual guidance, we easily get lost, deluded, confused, and discouraged. In this article, my goal is to help you learn how to find authentic spiritual guides that can deepen your path of inner transformation.
Table of contents
11 Authentic Forms of Spiritual Guidance
If you’re feeling lost on your life journey and need spiritual guidance, let me give you an overview. From a bird’s eye perspective, there are numerous paths available to you. The major ones include:
- Spiritual teachers and gurus (what we will be focusing on in this article)
- Personal spirit guides (Read: 7 Types of Spirit Guides (& How to Connect With Them)
- Spiritual books, courses, and workshops (some, not all, are helpful โ be discerning)
- Dream work (Read: How to Practice Dream Work (& Decipher Your Psyche)
- Learning to trust your intuition (Read: How to Trust Your Intuition)
- Astral travel (or active imagination)
- Automatic handwriting (Read: How to Channel Your Soul Through Automatic Writing)
- Meditation and visualizations
- Altered states of consciousness (Read: How to Induce a Trance State For Deep Psychospiritual Work)
- Esoteric practices such as reading the I Ching, Runes, or Oracle and Tarot cards
- Nature-oriented guidance such as going on a vision quest or ingesting a plant medicine like Ayahuasca
While some of these paths require tremendous commitment (these are usually the best), others require temporary or minimal effort. It’s important to focus on your current needs and desires to determine which paths to follow.
For instance, if you’re a busy mother of three children, maybe abandoning everything to follow a guru isn’t exactly a great idea. As always, be sensitive to your life context and ask yourself, “What is my core desire?“
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Also, the above list isn’t exhaustive (I’m sure I’ve missed something) โ you’ll find gaps, I’m sure. But I hope it has given you a clear overview on the kind of spiritual guidance paths available to you.
So what next?
In the rest of this article, we’ll be focusing specifically on how to find genuine spiritual teachers โ one of the most spiritually healing (but also dangerous) paths out there. Here’s what you need to know:
Why We Need Spiritual Teachers
We may study books all our lives, we may become very intellectual, but in the end we find that we have not developed at all spiritually … To quicken the spirit, the impulse must come from another soul. The person from whose soul such impulse comes is called the Guru โ the teacher.
โ Swami Vivekananda
In the realm of spirituality, true teachers never really teach you anything in the conventional way. They don’t want to provide new beliefs, rules, or information for you to cling to.
Instead, they help you to remove that which is in the way, that which separates you from the truth of who you already are and what you already know in the depth of your being.
In other words, a trueย teacher’s job is to serve as a mirror, until we’re able to realize that the light within them is also the light within us. (This, by the way, is what Shadow & Light as a spiritual service from this website offers.)
In the words of the 6th century sage Lao Tzu:
The Sage has no fixed heart of his own. Those who look at him see their own hearts.
True spiritual teachers are like empty vessels that are filled with nothing. Through them, we experience the limitless, untouched ocean of love that can be found in all things.
Through them, we also become conscious of whatever is blocking our ability to experience light. Whether it be past wounds, mental attachments, or egotistical desires, these blocks become the next part of your inner work.
I can say from personal experience that many spiritual seekers begin with the craving to find stimulating ideas, theories, beliefs, and intellectual discussions. But under the wings of a true spiritual teacher, they eventually end up becoming disappointed.
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Why?
Seekers who are looking for novel or glittery ideas become disillusioned because such ideas are only signposts towards the Truth โย they are not the Truth itself. And in many cases, these novel ideas actually become distractions that mislead us into the labyrinths of the mind again.
In the end, it’s true that the best Teacher is within us, that our ultimate guide is our own Souls. But how can those of us who have no idea what the Soul looks or feels like possibly guide ourselves when we are stumbling through the dark?
For the vast majority of people, a teacher, guru, guide, mentor, spiritually knowledgeable therapist, or even a wise soul friend or twin flame, is invaluable on the path toward a more awakened state.
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How to Find a True Spiritual Guide?
In ancient Shamanic wisdom, we don’t find a teacher; the teacher finds us.
Spirit Animals are one example of this truth: we don’t find our spirit animals, our spirit animals find us.
Once our thirst for answers awakens and we begin our spiritual awakening quest, the light within us becomes stronger, and the stronger it becomes, the more we attract guides and people that support our growth.
For example, it’s common for spiritual seekers to receive guidance from spiritual signs and omens,ย prophetic dreams, and even serendipitous teachings or messages.
Sometimes it takes years for spiritual teachers and spiritual guidance to find us. But when they come, how do we know whether they’re the right teacher for us?
Understandably, most people feel some level of fear when considering becoming involved with a teacher. Deep down we fear being used, exploited, or entrapped.
The truth is that we are only ever trapped by our own desires, attachments, and what we project onto the teacher. If we truly seek liberation, then all teachers are merely vehicles of learning โ and that’s as far as their role extends.
In my experience, you can tell that you’ve found your teacher when you feel an immediate strong and intense link of love for their teachings. Your heart will feel open and elevated when reading this person’s words or sitting in their presence.
But how do we know if these feelings are sincere? How do we know that we’re not just being charmed or given a false sense of security?
Here I find that the Sufi tradition has a wonderful approach where the disciples are allowed to test their Sheikhs (teachers).
Abลซ-Sa’ฤซd Abul-Khayr was a poet and Sufi mystic who was one of the first to describe the qualities to look for as proof in a true teacher.
There are at least ten characteristics of a true spiritual teacher:
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1. S/he must have embodied the spiritual message to be able to have disciples.
2. S/he must have personally traveled the mystic path to be able to show the way.
3. S/he must have become refined and educated in order to be an educator.
4. S/he must be generous and devoid of self-importanceย so that s/he can sacrifice wealth on behalf of the disciple.
5. S/he must have no hand in the discipleโs wealth so that s/he is not tempted to use it for himself/herself.
6. Whenever s/he can give advice through a sign, s/he will not use direct expression.
7. Whenever s/he can educate through kindness, s/he will not use violence and harshness.
8. Whatever s/he orders, s/he has first accomplished.
9. Whatever s/he forbids the disciple, s/he has abstained from himself/herself.
10. S/he will not abandon the students for the sake of the world.
These characteristics are a starting point to help us distinguish between power, greed, or status-hungry “teachers” and genuine vehicles of Spirit that contribute to our evolution.
Unlike other teachers, spiritual guides are faced with the most difficult teaching of all: to teach others the way of ego death and surrender into divine truth. Ultimately, the teacher is a ferryman who takes you from the shores of your ego to the shores of Divine Union.
Conclusion
Anandamayi Ma, described as “the most perfect flower the Indian soil has produced,”ย once explained that a disciple’s attitude is more important than the guru’s.
Ultimately, no one can give us self-realization. We must find it ourselves. An outer teacher can only reveal the real teacher hidden within us.
Even the false teachers we come across on the way help us to learn the value of developing our own sense of spiritual discernment and judgment.
Finding a true teacher and genuine spiritual guidance, deep down, is about discovering how sincere we are on our spiritual quest.
Honest seekers understand that the outer world is only a catalyst for bringing us closer to the truth that is already hidden within us.
I hope this article has helped to educate, empower, and inspire you. Tell me, how do you know when you’ve come across a true teacher?
By the way, if you’re looking for more down-to-earth support and guidance on your path, I recommend checking out our Shadow & Light spiritual membership. You’re welcome to come and go as you please, and I’d love to see you there!
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Unable to figure out how to download and open your stuff on my phone. Guess this isnโt for me.
I want your opinion on these coaches offering spiritual courses online for 8 weeks and costing 2300-5000 is that right? Or am I out of the loop of the cost of spiritual help
Thanks Christine for raising a valuable question. In the cyber-economy that is the online spiritual education industry, there’s all kinds of courses with all kinds of price tags. I’m not sure I’m fully convinced behind the price tag of many of these premium courses, even ones outside the spiritual area, but it seems like the popular thing at the moment with the ‘sales point’ of the price as an investment in your commitment to this learning journey as 95% of paid courses actually never get completed.
Some seem to be able to justify the price, with personal coaching, one-on-one support, real-life gatherings, etc.. but others fall a bit short. Like everything in the marketplace, one must be discerning.
Svaka oseba , ลพenskog ili muลกkog spola, ne treba duhovnog uฤitelja da krene putem duhvnog rasta , jer se u svakom ฤoveku , unutar njegov tela , Boลพijeg hrama je uteleลกena duลกa , koja vodi ljudski Um da sprejeme Duลกu kao deo Boga odnosno da prihvati kao Boga , i prihvati Bezuslovnu ljubav , do svakog stvarstva Boลพijeg , od rastline ,ลพivali do ฤoveka kao bitje na viลกjem nivoju zavesti.
Um je sluga Duลกi , i to mora ljudski um da prihvati Duลกu kao viลกi Ja i da nesluลพi ego , kao niลพi Ja , jer ego se bori da odrลพi svoj poloลพaj, stvara strah i dvome , a to je hrana za ego .
Kada Um prihvati Duลกu kao deo Boga , prihvatio Sveviลกnjega stvranika svega ลกto postoji u Univerzumu, i da izvrลกava volju Godpoda . Ja sam koji sam . Po volji Gospoda Boga tako je , jednom za sve ฤase.
This is a sure path to spiritual bypassing; it’s basically saying because we all carry a spark of the divine within us, spirit, we need no guidance or help, and should just trust whatever undeveloped or immature qualities within us to guide our way. Centuries of religious oppression and terrible things done in the name of God would heavily weigh against this line of thinking.
Mateo, I love and sincerely appreciate how you poked holes in your missive, asking pertinent questions a Seeker would actually ask of ones Self, in the places in the discussion where they would ask. This proves to me that you have walked this path, doubted and returned stronger for having challenged a concept or a potential teacher, but mostly it tells me that you impart Truth to us all. I have been a fan and a follower for a couple of years now, and your missives and wisdom always find me at the right times. I remain a fan, a follower, and a learner who walks parallel to you both.
I appreciate your kind words Ekel, the deeper I go into this the more ways I realize how much of a learner I really am haha. I guess it’s the paradox of this journey; the more I discover, the less I know, but the closer I feel. It’s a joy to be able to learn/teach through my interaction with you guys :)
This was amazing. My thing has been attracting a teacher that can educate me on some spiritual gifts and abilities I have. I havenโt found any other eduction on them. It is scary learning the ins and outs of yourself and basically testing the boundaries and depths of who you are so you can maintain control, without losing your sanity lol.
Thanks Key. It’s always tricky to explore gifts with teachers; the more one explores this path the less important the gifts seem to become.
So the teachers that do explore gifts are often focused too much on these ‘specialness’ aspects that in some wisdom traditions are considered distractions along the way that prevent us from going deeper into the nature of the ‘self’, or our true nature, that which is beyond the ephemeral gifts.
Key, YOU are your greatest teacher. Know thyself. Look yourself up anytime you want to and check yourself out on the sacred path of Looking At Your Charts. Our charts are very personal and tailored to each of us. We can read our charts to learn about our spiritual gifts and abilities, plus they show the shadow and the light side of our potential. They show us how to maneuver weaknesses, and which direction to go towards the bullseye in our life. See: astrology, human design, numerology, enneagram, myers-briggs, discover your archetypes and live them in the light, etc.
I have been with a very famous and well-regarded guru for 20 years and feel more lost now than when I started.
Ultimately, some, perhaps only a hand full of us will come to the conclusion that our best guru will be Love and Forgivenesses as in the true teachings of Christ.
This is the hardest lesson for me, yet I know is the most valuable one.
Just imagine an eagle asking a chicken how to fly because they too have feathers…
Gracias!
Thank you Manu, I feel like Love and Forgiveness seems to be at the center of most major teachings from these religious figures. Ultimately which path you choose is up to each person and their own inclinations, culture, etc, we definitely need to find a common thread within these paths to appreciate one anothers truths but I definitely can vouch for the necessity to commit to one path in order to soar like the Eagle :)
Thank you Sol. This article was very very beautiful.
Thank you Sayidah, I’m grateful to to hear that :)
Good read. Mateo (and Aletheia) have a knack for cutting through the bovine excrement. Though I am wary of the more esoteric stuff, such as divination, crystals and the like, I have yet to read an article by Lonerwolf that has not sounded true and sincere. As for my own teacher… well at this moment all is dead silent. I am challenged by my partner of course, but my inner voice is silent, and I receive no guidance/messages/synchronicities from outside either. Eckhart Tolle says that the universe will bring us the experiences we need, and how do we know that this or that experience is the one we need? Because it is the one we’re having right now, Tolle says. A tad frustrating that, since I cannot discern, conceptually nor emotionally what the lesson is, that is contained in the life experience I am having. It is a bit like Oscar Wilde says: “Experience is a harsh teacher: it gives the test first, and the lesson afterwards”. To me it feels a bit like: life gives me a test, I fail the test, but I get no info on what it is that I had to do differently.
[Sigh]. Well, keep plodding on, I suppose. Perhaps one day the inner resistance will erode and something will shift. It is just that after six months of self-inquiry, study and daily meditation, not even a hint of progress is apparent. A bit disheartening that.
Rik
Thank you Rik for your kind words, I’m happy to hear you find value in most of what we share. Much of the esoteric stuff comes down to using the right conceptual lens to approach them; divination not as a form of predicting the future but as a mirror into our unconscious and how we interpret the ‘messages’ it’s trying to share, hence the psycho-spiritual approach.
I feel that’s really one of the keys we’ve learned, commitment to one path is something we’re rediscovering this year. There’s a million different guides out there, with a million different truths. But there’s very little communication in between them, ‘comparative studies’ if you will. Eckart Tolle is a teacher of the enlightened path, with elements of psychology. Then there’s the full non-duality teachers, or the Buddhists liberation of samsara methods, or the mystical Christians.
Once one commits to one path, one single ‘living philosophy’, it seems to serve as an anchor or structure that allows us to go deeper, to anchor these truths not just in momentary understandings but in a lived embodied perception of them. All paths share commonalities, some paths are more ’embodied’ as we call it, or human, without bypassing our emotions, our human desires, etc.
In the marketplace that is the spiritual landscape of today, it’s hard to feel progress as we’re building a Frankenstein with borrowed wisdom that we haven’t ‘earned’ as Jung put it, making it dangerous.
Not every teacher knows or feels the same way we do. As they range on differing levels of form, ability, style, and experience.
Some are highly advanced intellectually and personally here to engage in higher practice then move on to higher Spirit dimensions.
While others take a while but become full of divine light and love, and as you say become vehicles or vessels of pure compassion to their devotees while they are in the body (or human form).
So some short stay visits to Gurus are for correcting elements of interest or curiosity in ourselves along the way or for pure investigation of one part of the populous are engaging themselves in understanding themselves or the new intentions they seek for a better world.
It’s the same principle as growing up. We need our parents for the early stages of development, then our teachers and higher school educators later on. Each one has elements to give at each stage, some good, some crappy, and not so helpful until we reach a stage of thinking and acting on behalf of our own selves. Knowing when to step in and learn and when to disregard them as irrelevant, greedy for power fame, or political gain.
So through discernment of good from bad or crappy teachers, we can select them or not, even learning what is undesirable from some of the crappy ones, as well as defining the right moves of how much education we wish to engage in with those that are Mystics or divine Sages or just reincarnated beings with Soulfulness and love imparting pure knowledge and love from very humble surroundings.
Conclusion
It is a veritable divine feast these days out there, so be careful whom you sit down to dine with as they may not all enjoy your style and dining habits and may wish to take your mind and emotions for a ride for their own gain and benefits. So be very selective and only dine with those that light the fire within you and meld well with your vibrations.
NAMASTE
Thank you John, I appreciate your wise observations.
I am so lucky to have found Amma and to have received her Darshan. She is the most beautiful spiritual teacher who has planted a seed of spirituality within me, which has slowly grown over the years.
Amma is an inspiration to many, we need more sources of direct connection to the heart like her.